Vaughan's Trip North
by cfishy
Summary: This is the mostly light-hearted tale of what I imagine Vaughan to be up to during and following the events of EOS and KOA. KOA SPOILERS THROUGHOUT. Vaughan finds a large manor in the middle of no where, and the finest stables he's ever seen. The story starts small, but grows into the complex world we know from TOG! Rated T just to be safe. UPLOADING WEEKLY.
1. Chapter 1: Heading North

**Vaughan's Trip North**

 **Hello all,**

 **If you're following me, then you know that I said my next story would be a cross over in both of SJM's worlds thus far. While writing the crossover, I had to answer questions as to where some of the known characters would be, Vaughan was one of those. What I imagined his story to be has been so intriguing to me, so I thought I'd share it while the other story is stewing in my mind. This is the tale of what I imagine him to be doing, and how he lives out his days.**

 **Feel free to review or comment or question, nothing motivates me more. I love hearing thoughts whether they are positive or criticism. Before you ask though, our favorites do make an appearance, but not until chapter 14. This story purposefully starts slow, but the problems the characters face get bigger, as their world expands. POV will be mainly from Vaughan and Holly, but be prepared for any character!**

 **This story and characters were inspired by the world of Throne of Glass, by Sarah J. Maas.**

 **Happy Reading,**

 **Court**

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 **I wrote this for myself, but I thought I would put it here if ya'll are interested.**

 **Cast of NEW Characters:**

Vaughan: Cadre member, and blood sworn to Maeve

Hermod Eldostram: Father to the three Eldostram's below

Holly Eldostram: Eldest daughter, 19

Vili Eldostram: Middle child, 12

Uller Eldostram: Youngest child and only son, 3

Pip: village boy

Miss Lawbent: owner of the sweet shop in the village

Mr. Lester Wiltald: General store owner

Racer: A black stallion

Wrecker: Racers horse brother

Clipper: A white and black spotted mare

Shiny: a black colt

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 **Chapter 1: Heading North**

 **Vaughan:**

Gavriel and Fenrys had split from me over two months ago, and in that time I had done a large circle around the north. Not looking into the deep for Lorcan, but for a great crater or blackened land that his power had the tendency to create. The problem was, the Valg hordes manifested similar powers.

Perhaps there was a reason beyond his disloyalty for Maeve wanting him dead. Lorcan was an arrogant self-serving bastard, but he was a damn good commander. With the new threat to the land I had wondered if his ruthlessness came from being part Valg, but it was not likely since I had seen him bleed red more times than I could count over the centuries.

I flapped onward. This was a pointless endeavor. Even if I found him, it was unlikely I could kill him on my own, and in the time it took to return to Gavriel and Fenrys, Lorcan would be gone. This plan we had was shit.

We only had to wander around until Maeve called us back to do battle.

Because a great battle would come, where we would be, and who would we would be fighting was still unknown to us. Rutting Whitethorn and Lorcan destroying our trust with our queen. Now we will never know shit about plans until we were shipped off to do it.

Killing Lorcan wasn't something I wanted to do. He had taught me too much to want to kill him. Maybe I should stop wandering around the country and pick a spot for him to happen upon. I'd have to find somewhere with plenty of pretty females, or girls I suppose, I hadn't seen a Fae female since leaving Doranelle.

Orynth sat at the bottom of a great mountain range, over the past weeks I have looked as far east as I dare, and along the water line. Today, though I would begin the journey even further North. The best place to hide in Terrasen.

…

Three days later, I decided it was a marvelous place to hide if you didn't mind the freezing cold. Lorcan, would hide, just to make us suffer when we came looking for him.

The bastard.

With every mile I was more convinced about the lands beyond the mountains being a good spot to hide. There were manors and houses far grander than I expected. Nobility and rich who had run from Adarlan. Smart.

Noble girls where usually prettier, but knew nothing of the bedroom. Even hidden away, I doubted they would give up their virtue, not when it could be used to secure rich husbands who coveted that inexperience.

I swooped lower, maybe Lorcan was hiding in one that was abandoned, as many looked that way. Either they never made it to the house, or they had returned to rally behind their queen.

I would love to sleep in a real bed. A real bed for free sounded better than sitting in the trees for another frozen night.

The next house, the next manor, that was where I would stay. Otherwise it would be too dark to see said building.

An hour passed and with the mountains so close, the sun was all but gone. The temperature dropped significantly. Even my bird form was chilled. I flew on, looking for another house, no matter size or occupancy. It was too cold to be picky now.

It took until morning to find a place. Despite my disposal of my requirements, it seemed to be everything I wished. It was large, kept up, comfortable, a few people inhabited it, as there were horses and other livestock.

The question of who lived here was answered soon after I had done a full circle around the place. The back door banged open and a girl tottered out, a small child in one hand, a bucket in the other.

She disappeared into the barn. There was a stable in the front of the house, and a barn to the back. This barn held goats and cows if the sounds and smells were any indication. There was not even an inch of snow and the small child deviated from entering the stable to play in it. Watching him just made me colder.

The girl emerged a few minutes later with a full bucket of milk. She let the child continue playing in the snow, leaving him outside. The reasoning was answered another moment later when she again emerged from the kitchen door, this time trekking to the side of the house where firewood was stacked. She took as much as she could carry, and handed one log to the boy, who brought it inside with her.

A well-practiced routine. This family had serving girls and their families here, they must be very rich. If they allowed children to live in the house with them, they must have space and a kind enough heart.

I glanced at the stack of fire wood again. It was fairly low, perhaps I could offer my wood chopping services in exchange for room and board. That was close enough to free.

The front door opened on my next round of circling of the house, I was trying to glean someone through the windows. The same girl again, she had on another layer of clothing though.

She walked swiftly to the horses, and saddled one. All her movements were efficient, quick. She was obviously cold.

Another person came out the door. A man, quite older. I tipped myself around, and took up a perch on a tree.

"Thank you, Holly." He said then kissed the side of her head.

She seemed reluctant at whatever was about to happen, opening her mount hseveral time before she said, "tell them I miss them."

"If they are still alive." He joked. She bristled.

"They will be, and so will you. You are to advise. You're too old to fight." She lectured.

The old man chuckled and swung up on the to the horse. A beautiful horse, larger than even some of the Asterion mounts that they breed to the east of Doranelle.

"Wrecker, do steer clear of battle." Holly said when she patted the horse's nose. She handed the man a large pack and untied the reins to hand to him too.

"Do not be angry with me, Holly." He said when they were out from under the cover.

She shifted on her feet. "I'm not. We won't be safe, even here, if the war is lost. Besides, we have sat back for too long. Aelin could be mad at us for hiding."

"Then I will tell her about my three lovely children who are all alive, and I will tell Lady Elide about what's in the basement, and Queen Aelin will not be too mad." He announced.

His daughter looked around quickly. Searching for ease droppers even in the middle of nowhere. Luckily osprey were not counted as ease droppers. She did see me though. The odd smudge of white and brown among the green, green trees. Her eyes landed right on me, assessed my size or odd appearance and then continued roving. "If Lady Elide is still alive, yes." She murmured to her father, quieter now.

"Well, we will see. I'm sure Prince Aedion will remember our offer to house the Bane who made it this far north." He patted his mount. "Everything will be alright."

Holly nodded but added nothing else as her father spurred his horse off to battle.


	2. Chapter 2: Introductions

**Chapter 2: Introductions**

 **Vaughan:**

Sometimes when I spent too long in my bird form, I felt jiggly when I tried to walk on two legs again.

I walked up their drive now. Having flown down the hill, only to walk up it in another form. Best to let them see me coming for a time.

The gates were still open, and maybe they didn't shut, from the rusted look of them. The manor was in good shape, for having no staff. The girl I had thought was maid was the daughter of the lord who lived here. She would never saddle a horse herself if there was anyone else to do it. Three children, or so the lord had said, the girl was likely the oldest, leaving her the only protector of the other two.

The snow I had seen an hour ago was gone. The sun had risen and melted it all. The girl, Holly, was still outside. The three horses that remained, were standing on the edge of a field patch. The girl was hooking a large piece of metal to them. Straps led from the contraption to latch around the horses' chests. The smallest horse, didn't quite fit in the harness, and the other two would likely suffer the extra weight for it.

I watched silently, not wanting to scare her. She patted the lead horse's rump. This black one was matching to Wrecker, whom her father rode, led to the way down the patch of garden.

A plow had been hooked to the horses, they pulled it and the machine turned the soil. Smart invention, how it got up here I'd never know. The patch of soil was small, but certainly enough for a full residence here, and they didn't have anywhere close to a full house. The horses knew when to turn and how fast to go. Holly didn't bother saying a thing to them. Well practiced, I supposed. She pulled the upturned roots from the ground tossing them to the side.

When she finished the first row and turned to the next, she noticed me.

Her eyes bulged and her stance went totally straight, alert. A lady even if she was wearing dirty overalls.

"This is private property." She informed me, her tone was clear. Get out.

I leaned against the well wall. "I was looking for a place to stay for a week or so. I could help out around the estate." I said calmly.

She looked me over. My size, my ears. Obviously, she needed the help, being the only caretaker here. She was a lady who would never have lifted a finger if things hadn't gone to shit in her country.

"We don't need help." She evenly. A court voice, or one she used with strangers at the very least. Guarded and calm.

I crossed my arms, letting the bulge of them be what drew her attention. "I'll chop firewood and hunt for fresh game, for everyone at this estate."

"How did you find this place?" She asked, ignoring my offer.

"I'm Fae."

She snorted.

"I have an animal form. I was sent by my queen to hunt down a criminal we believe is hiding in these woods. I was flying over the land and saw your manor. I would like a warm bed for a few nights before I continue further north." I explained carefully.

"What queen do you serve?" She asked quickly. Her sapphire eyes were insanely wide. Sapphire eyes and blonde hair, there was no more noble combination, well at least in Terrasen. Blonde hair was a mark of fire, and blue eyes was the mark of two of Brannon's children. Though half the people in the north had one or the other.

Ah, but did I lie or not. She likely didn't get much news this far north, but she hadn't said a word against Maeve, only the Valg. Maeve would never side with the Valg, so the truth would likely not be too destructive. "Maeve," I straightened fully. She again assessed me.

"How do I know the criminal isn't you." She asked, still calm and kind.

I raised a brow. "I have an osprey form, I was sent north to cover more ground. The one I'm hunting has a wolf form."

She narrowed her eyes, "That's not proof." She shook her head. Her first movement.

"I can offer you none. You know little about the court happenings in Doranelle, and so there is no way corroborate my story." If she wanted to play smart, so would I.

"You were sent North to look for the criminal?" She asked, and I nodded my answer. "Why would you only want to stay only a few days, and not all of winter, surely that the better option."

"I didn't want to assume you were that generous. I will also have to follow the whispers of where he is, I hear something, and I'll be off." I tried to make myself seem not so intimating. There was no getting around the fact that I was high Fae, but she didn't need to know I had been trained to kill since I could walk.

"You'll stay in the southern wing of the house, taking care of your own needs there. I have no real abilities to force you out of my house or off my land. If your criminal comes creeping around, I expect you keep them from this house and the children inside." She informed me. She turned back to the dirt.

"Should I let myself inside or do the children not scare easy?" I asked half-hearted. I expected to watched, aggressively.

"If you remain in the southern wing, you won't see them when in the house." She said with a huff of breath.

I pushed off of the well. "I'll just put my things inside, then start hunting." I told her.

"Check the fish traps while you're out." She called. Not an order, but not really a request.

In the house was warm. Well, the northern wing was warm, the middling rooms was as well. Likely they never bothered with the southern half of the place. It was still warmer than anything outside. I opted for the first room on the ground floor. It was closest to the door and had a window large enough for my bird form to fit out of. I'd just have to get the boards off. I didn't think she would mind. There was no bathing room reserved for me, but there was a shared one with the next room. It was small, but well made. The bed wasn't made, but there were linens in the top drawer of the dresser. Everything was very nice. An insane price would have to be paid to get everything up here in the first place.

I made the bed and little flowers decorated the comforter. I might have to steal the next rooms blankets as well. Or build a fire in the little sitting room. There was no chimney here. After I chopped wood and hunted though.


	3. Chapter 3: Chopping and Cooking

**Chapter 3: Chopping and Cooking**

 **Vaughan:**

Holly, it seemed rose early every day. She tended the whole place herself. When she had said that they didn't need help here, well she really didn't. There was no task, no repair she couldn't do. Though she admitted that she hated hunting and wood chopping one evening.

Her younger sister, whom I had yet to see, sat in her room and sewed ladylike things. Uller, the almost four year old, he informed me gleefully, helped Sissy with everything. Holly hadn't minded her brother talking with me, hadn't warned him that I was dangerous and terrible.

He hadn't a lick of fear, and other than the initial bout of being snuck up on, Holly had yet to give me a whiff of fear either. It was so at odds with every experience since swearing the blood oath to Maeve. People, human and Fae were terrified of me, of all of the Cadre.

To have strangers, strangers who had acknowledged their lack of ability against me, and still not be frightened was refreshing. It was hard to not be in awe of them. It was hard to not like them.

Holly, spent more time in the kitchen than was healthy. Even when she was tending to the animals, she had something baking. She must find some pleasure from mixing and stirring. The smells that filled the manor from her cooking were delightful. Had there been more people in the manor, it wouldn't have penetrated the whole house, but with so few people, it smelled heavenly all the way to my room.

On the third evening, I had chopped the whole tree they had felled for the winter. Holly had taken one look at the piles of wood and been so thoroughly shocked at the completed task, that she had turned back into the kitchen. She likely expected me chop only what was needed for the nights I stayed.

With no one around to spar with, and no formal training ring, the swing of the ax had alleviated the need to keep my body in shape, and worked create aiming challenges. I had taken the logs and set them in odd patterns, hard angles. Tossing axes through it was a release more than I could have hoped for.

I enjoyed the menial labor.

Holly, it turned out turned back into the house to bake me a thank you present. A cake.

Before her cooking I had only been eating fish from the rivers, raw, and in my osprey form. The cooked meats, the steaming vegetables that she had presented each night were the most delicious things I had tasted in my life. Something sweet, something with oozing frosting, would likely top that.

"Vaughan, we made a cake! For you!" Uller chirped. Holly was licking the white sugary frosting from her finger.

I was struck every time I saw her, but with the raw sunlight filtering through her golden hair, well she was gorgeous. She was beautiful, more beautiful than most, even when she didn't wear the form fitting dresses and style her hair at all.

She leaned on the counter and seemed content to eat a slice of cake with her brother and a traveler. Her blonde hair didn't have dirt in it, and it loosely braided around the side of her head. Those overalls she always insisted on wearing were clean for once too.

"We wanted to thank you for your services." Holly smiled slightly, "and I like cake." She was unusual in that she wasn't afraid to make eye contact with me, and more than once I had thought she could read my thoughts.

"Thank you." I said roughly. "Did you frost it, it looks marvelous?" I asked Uller. He nodded enthusiastically and pointed to the knife and plates laid out, waiting for me to dish out.

It was then that Vili decided to descend the stairs.

"I smelled something sweet for once." She drawled. I impenitently disliked her. Anyone who could be so rude to Holly was not someone who deserved respect.

"I don't have time to make sweets all of the time." Holly answered sweetly, more of an apology than anything. I shook my head. I didn't think Vili did anything around here and still had the nerve to criticize her sister.

"I didn't come into the kitchen for the sweets alone." Her sister turn tactics. Vili rounded on me. Holly raised a brow, not looking at me. Vili extended her hand, delicately, like a lady. "I'm Vili Eldstrom, your host."

"Vaughan," I said gruffly, took her hand and shook it instead of the kiss she was expecting. She tilted her head in a predatory manner. I straightened, assessing the wisdom of saying precisely what I was thinking.

"You must be tired from chopping all of that wood, but you are so fit." She mused, dragging her eyes up and down my arms and torso, lower.

"Fae tire much slower than humans." I was reluctant to give her so much as a smile, but I couldn't a smirk, nonetheless.

She seemed to know that smirk wasn't for her, and bristled ever so slightly. Not court trained then. And not used to getting a firm no. "We don't get many visitors here."

"Vili, I think you've been cooped up too much, you should go with me to the village tomorrow." Holly interjected with a knowing look. "Vaughan is our guest and is helping us with tasks father usually does."

"I find it funny he showed up the day father left." Vili snapped back at her sister.

Holly didn't move her head, but looked in her sisters direction through her lashes. I didn't think Holly was capable of yelling. There wasn't one mean bone in her body, but this discomfort between sisters had been growing for a while. I had a feeling that my presence was not going to do this relationship any favors.

"Well, I was wondering if I might continue my search, but return here frequently at night." I directed my question at Holly, who checked to make sure her sister wasn't totally against me being here.

After a moment she nodded. "We would be pleased to have you around." She amended when I didn't respond to the nod.


	4. Chapter 4: Looking for Lorcan

**Hello All,**

 **This Chapter isn't even close to the 1000 word mark, but I thought it was important to have. So I will be uploading two chapters this week.**

 **-Court**

* * *

 **Chapter 4: Looking for Lorcan**

 **Vaughan:**

I took the skies in the morning, I would fly further north today. There might be some hidden community that Lorcan found. It was more likely that Lorcan was alone, in his wolf form so that I might not recognize him. If he was hiding at all.

It was strange that this far north the kill order didn't sing in my blood. It was as if there was no order at all, something had changed perhaps. But Maeve didn't call me back. I didn't feel compelled to hunt. I'm sure if I found Lorcan that would be very different. Finding Lorcan could take decades, and maybe Maeve had accepted that, not making it an incessant and crazed order.

The blood oath had always been a thing I wanted, my father had it before me, but now that I was bound to the same queen, it didn't give me the pride I had expected when she had offered it.

I knew the world was an unfair place. The way Vili lived as a lady and her sister a servant was unfair. Both would be dressed and cloaked in the finest dresses had things gone better a decade ago.

Should this war end and the world be righted once more, I would like to visit Holly's horse farm that she would rebuild. I would visit it and buy a grand horse. I had never really had need for a horse.

The wind cut into my feathers, making it frigid. The mountains and forests all lay behind me. The flat lands, this far north, were nothing but sheets of snow covering the ground. Had I been further east or west I wouldn't be confident there was ground under me at all, but sheets of ice over water.

It was a tundra that revealed no dark wolves on the prowl, and no bipedal creatures.

Next time I went for a long flight, I would head for the North Sea to the east.

I should have checked the village that Holly was going to first. I had flown there a few times, but if Lorcan was just arriving, he would smell me on her and Uller. He would likely kill them, just to save himself.

There was nothing this far north. I was convinced.

I banked hard, and flapped quickly back to the barest of civilizations.


	5. Chapter 5: The Village

**Chapter 5: A Trip to the Village**

 **Holly:**

It was three days to the village on summer roads. This would be our last trip until winter fell completely. Already the frost that gathered each morning looked a bit more like the first snow. It still melted each afternoon. It would be an early winter, and that meant stocking up on supplies, especially if Vaughan was staying with us through the winter.

When I said he would hunt game for us, I hadn't expected the mountains of it he brought in. It was easy for him, and he ensured we had enough to last through the times he would be gone.

Generous and kind for a high Fae. I suppose that wasn't fair. I hadn't met many in my time since leaving court.

Vili decided she would trust my eye for purchasing fabrics, not there was much choice anyway. She liked it when I went alone to the village, it meant I bought all the fabric in the store. The fabrics she didn't like, she would make clothes for me or Uller.

She was constantly full of emotion, hatred, longing, jealousy, and other vile feelings that she couldn't change. I didn't know if the stories I told her about our life before we moved was helping or hurting her. I knew the beginning of her anger wasn't with being forced into hiding, but our mother's death. It wasn't me she hated, it was Uller. She was desperate for attention that I couldn't give her. That was obvious by her flirting with everyone who wasn't related to her.

Vili was why I brought Uller with me, braving the wilds of the north with a toddler. Our mother was old when she had Vili, there was seven years between the two of us, but when another nine years passed when she fell pregnant with Uller. We knew it was a death sentence. She carried him nearly to term, but Uller had to be cut from her. I was near enough the age to bear my own children that I was in the birthing room, but Vili was scarred by the blood and screaming.

She couldn't love him, not until he had a personality. I hoped that more time would sweeten her disposition before Uller realized how cruel she was at times.

Leaving Vili alone was not something I did lightly, but it wasn't the first time. She was capable for a week. Hopefully the manor would still be standing afterwards. Especially if Vaughan returned before we did.

"Sissy, can we please buy pecans?" Uller asked from the top of the horse. We brought the cart, as we did only for stocking up, we made many trips in the summertime. This was his hundredth request for something. We often put in requests for things we knew would never come. Pecans was one of the more plausible groceries we asked for.

Had the village folk not relied on our purchases so much, then we would be more careful with throwing money at things that weren't necessities, but they trusted us, and us them.

Trust was one thing, respect another.

The general store had most things we needed. I handed Mr. Witald the list I had compiled before leaving. He looked it over, then eyeballed Uller who was poking at the candies.

"Uller, we will go Ms. Lawbent's next." I told him. Ms. Lawbent was the innkeeper's wife. She was her own person, who loved to cook and bake as much as I did. She ran a shop for women and children. It had all the things that husbands didn't like their wives buying. More fabrics, books, and treats than I could imagine, especially in a place like this. The middle of nowhere.

"If you buy all this, then he can have a peppermint too. Your boy is a sweet creature." Mr. Witald said gruffly.

I coughed lightly. "Uller is my brother." I didn't know why I bothered, this was the same conversation we had every time I came here without my father.

"Ay, keep telling everyone that. That way you can marry well, my boy don't mind though." He added with a wink. His son was off in war, and likely wouldn't return if his father's activeness was any indication of the son's skill level. Sons were so often not their fathers, and I didn't wish the boy dead. Just this imagined chemistry between the two of us.

"If you could put the things in the cart, we will be leaving in the morning." I smiled tightly.

Mr. Witald kept looking down the list. "We don't have pecans, but we got Hazelnuts."

"That will work." I forced myself to smile. I left a stack of coins on the counter. Likely a little more than half of what we owed, as per usual. Not that they didn't trust us to pay. The only thing they might trust, now.

"And these clothes, what you needing with clothes so large?" He asked when I scooped Uller up to leave.

"We have a traveler staying with us through winter. The clothes are for him." I sighed.

"Your pa isn't at the house though. You shouldn't be having strange men staying in your house without men to protect you." The man pushed his belly up onto the counter to support it.

"We will be fine, thank you for your concern." We pushed out the little shop, the bell ringing much more merrily than I felt. Usually there was more insistence that Uller was my son. Especially when I had to carry him bundled.

Mrs. Lawbent's was a bustle of activity, mixing and pouring caramels. I had tried to make caramels once, but Uller had nearly stuck his hand into the boiling sugar and I refused to risk it again. Not for a while yet.

I looked down the row of books while Uller went to play with the toys in the back. The books here ranged from cookbooks and romance novels, and things husbands would easily grow bored of and retreat. In the back, there were tales of heroines and rebellion from oppression, things that were shared and passed around, not charged to accounts. Things that many girls who lived in the middle of nowhere needed to read.

"I got a new book, I think you'll like, but you won't be able to get half the ingredients out here." She boasted.

"I remember when that wasn't so." I lamented pitifully. I shouldn't talk of before, I only brought painful memories of friends who were fighting for everyone right now.

I had lived in the palace, I lived in Orynth for the first years of my life, shoved into tutoring with other royal children, I had caught the flirting of whoever Aelin rejected that day. The Eldostrom's were direct descendants of Brannon, but now we just had a small territory.

Though it was always strange to me that there was three of us of an age of both genders, well four boys if you counted Aedion. Ren had older sisters, much older, and with real magic, but they weren't around anymore.

Ravi, Sol, Ren, and Aedion. Elide, Aelin, and me. That might be left. Elide hadn't been seen since, but according to everyone, neither had I. I had faith that we would all make it back to Orynth.

One day.

…

On the last leg of the way back to the manor a large white bird swopped down and landed on the seat of the cart next to me.

It looked at me quizzically.

I didn't have long to ponder what it meant before there was a bright flash and Vaughan replaced the bird.

"I didn't know you could do that!" I cried. That odd bird had been at our house right before Vaughan had joined us was actually him. "How long were watching us before you announced yourself?" I demanded, perhaps a bit harsher than I meant.

Vaughan quirked up a half smile. He was amused at my lack of knowledge of Fae. I had known they had animal forms, but I forgot. If he didn't want to tell me, then I would just look at the horses. At their butts, because they were pulling the cart.

"I found the manor when the sun came up, I watched for maybe three hours." He reached for the reins, probably seeing that my hands were near blue. I forgot gloves.

I gave him a look. One I hoped said 'don't you dare hurt my horses'. He smiled at that too.

"No luck finding your query?" I shoved my hands under my arm pits, warming them nicely.

He shook his head. "I was sent north to find him. Beyond the mountain range is a good place to hide. I'm convinced he will come here eventually."

My cheeks heated. Did he know who I was. The north was a good place to hide. I've been doing it for a decade. "What did he do?" Vaughan looked over his shoulder, ensuring that Uller was still snuggled down in a bed roll in the cart. Vaughan struck me as the type to always tell the truth, even if he shouldn't or it wasn't pleasant.

My father had kept many secrets from me. The plans for the fall of Terrasen were far more encompassing than I knew when it was happening. Almost none of them worked out though. Aelin had been sent into hiding alone, Elide might be dead, Aedion was practically enslaved by the King of Adarlan even if he defied him in small manners, Ren was who knew where, his sisters dead. Ravi and Sol had been spared from the killing because of their age, leaving them alone as well. None of that was supposed to happen. They were all to come to the manor my father built in secret, with more secrets buried beneath.

"He is blood sworn, as I am, he defied our queen, stole from her, and came to this continent looking for more things to steal. His main crime is betraying Maeve."

"Doesn't she only offer the blood oath to the most powerful Fae?" I asked my toes. Not really sure if I wanted the answer.

"The most powerful and the most handsome." Vaughan corrected me, in mock seriousness.

I assessed his bastard's grin. I saw the malcontent underneath, the shield for what it was. "Can you kill him?"

"Two others were sent to this continent to assist me." He matched my seriousness.

I quirked an eyebrow, I wasn't worried about physical ability. "Wasn't he your friend?"

"My queen has ordered me to kill him, it doesn't matter how you feel when you're given a blood order. I will be compelled to complete the task, the second I see him." Vaughan said the words tightly.

"You don't like the blood oath." I passed, it as more of a question.

He turned to me, suddenly serious. "It is the greatest honor to serve the queen in this manner."

I wasn't convinced. "She's a queen, not the queen. Not here at least." I corrected him.

"You mean Aelin of wildfire." He prompted.

We were talking about very personal things. I had known this man—male for only a couple of weeks and I almost blurted that I was apart of her court. Or would be, when she returned here to fight, when it was safe again.

"Have you met her?" I asked instead.

"Met would not be the word I would use." His eyes went slightly distant, as if he was looking down a road to Doranelle and not to the manor.

Better to tell mostly the truth, and lie only where I absolutely had to. I was sure he was too smart to fool much any way. Plus, it wouldn't matter now. My father would have reached the army by now, and used his name to get him into the castle to help. "I've met her."

"Oh?" He seemed genuinely interested. It was nice to speak someone my age, or acted my age at least. It was so good to just talk to someone who wasn't related to me. Maybe he was compelling me to speak and share my secrets. I didn't really care. I had talked to only family and a handful of villagers so rarely. Somedays I went the whole day speaking only to Uller.

"Aelin always liked pretty things, so my father gave her a horse for one of her birthdays, but her parents thought the horse was too big, and too dangerous. My father brought me to court as well, because I was very good at riding." I smiled at Clipper's butt remembering how afraid everyone had been when I rode past a hundred times as fast and without saddle or helmet. I think it was the only thing I ever did something better than Aelin. Horse riding. She didn't want to muss her dresses or muck her slippers.

Horses could be pretty, but getting them there was a lot of work. The fact that we had kept so few horses was proof of that, and they were payment for the manors secret construction.

The workers were given warhorses to ride down the mountain and to their deaths. The horses bought their work, and the war secured their silence.

Had everything else worked to our favor, it might have been worth it.

Vaughan seemed to sense my happy memory had faded back into something else. "Clipper and Racer are the luckiest horses to have someone so skilled as their owner."

"Maybe they will rebuild our horse empire after the war." I sighed and leaned back into the wood seat. Clipper had a colt two years ago, and was again pregnant. I loathed bringing her on this trip, but Racer couldn't really do it alone, not without straining. Wrecker was gone, my father ad rode him, and Shiny was too young still. Clipper was the only option, even though she was due in two months.

"Anything that can be spared is being commandeered for armies. Horses will be valued." He would know, I suppose. Having survived wars over and over.

"How old are you?" I asked despite not really wanting to know. I watched him anyway. Wanting to know the whole truth to how he felt about being immortal, not just a number.

"I'm one of the older blood-sworn." He stopped talking after that. I drummed my fingers on the wood to demonstrate my waiting. The side of his mouth quirked up again. "I'm in my sixth century."

"Oh, that's it?" I asked faking disappointment.

He turned his head to say something incredibly indignant, but saw the joke written all across my face. "How are old are you then?"

"I'm almost in my second decade." I said impertinently.

"And you're not married, you haven't had any kids." Vaughan asked, mercifully not glancing at Uller.

"I'm being saved." I said evenly.

"For?" He urged me.

I cleared my throat, suddenly tight. "Terrasen needs much for this war, I'm one of the only ladies left, even if my father is a minor lord."

"Sold for troops?" He clarified, stark still.

"Something like that. It is the only thing I can offer Aelin during war." I mused.

"What about the bows that are everywhere?" he asked.

"I vomit every time I shoot something, I don't think I would do well on a killing field." I drew my brows together. Trying not to picture it.

"I think you can do anything that needs to be done." He patted my hands.

We continued talking the whole way to the manor. At least until Uller woke up and showed him the clothes we had purchased, the bright shirt Uller picked out because he thought Vaughan would like the blue color. Vaughan offered to repay me, but I refused.


	6. Chapter 6: Apple Orchard

**Chapter 6: Apple Orchard**

 **Vaughan:**

There was much to be done for winter preparations, even if it already seemed like winter had come. I had awoken one morning to Holly on a ladder nailing the rest of the shutters shut before the winter winds came to rip them off. I offered to do it. I always offered, she rarely accepted my help. And when she did, I knew it the most difficult of the tasks, ones that she truly needed help with.

The following week, she and Uller spent all of their days in the orchard. Picking up half frozen apples, for them or for the horses.

Uller had taken to climbing the trees, content to shake branches and let them drop into a basket or our heads. Holly had a hard time telling me to be elsewhere. There were many trees. Maybe her father had chosen this place so the horses would always a snack nearby. The trees hadn't been planted by humans, but had grown naturally. There weren't neat lines, but a jumble of limbs and trunks. Making them all the more fun to climb.

There was a crack that set me reaching for my blades, carefully concealed so Uller didn't grab them by mistake. But Uller had climbed onto a branch that couldn't hold his weight. I watched, too far away to do a thing, as Holly dived for Uller's head.

She wrapped a hand around it, so when he thumped into the hard earth, it was her hand that was spilt open, not his head. She had insane reflexes for a human girl whose main exercise was walking horses.

The tang of blood instantly shoved up nose, confirming my fears.

Uller screamed, though I knew thanks to his sister, it wasn't in pain but shock.

I scooped the boy up, getting him off of the cold ground. Holly's hand was bleeding and bleeding, but she didn't look at the blood dripping to the ground, instead she started comforting her brother. Reminding him of his foolishness all while trying to calm him.

When he settled, I took Holly's hand and healed it. Her knuckles had spilt, and her fingers were bruised, but it was better than his head.

…

 **Holly:**

I always liked baking.

Now with someone who seemed to offer only praise, it was my favorite thing to do.

Vaughan loved anything I cooked. Uller hated most vegetables and Vili apposed crusts, father had not liked fish, but Vaughan had not one complaint or request.

Not that I couldn't be amendable to those requests, but it was something rewarding about Vaughan actually enjoying the food. Of course, there was always the chance he was pretending to enjoy it, Fae were very good at that to spare us humans of our feelings.

I doubted it for some reason.

"What's this?" Vaughan asked upon entering through the kitchen door.

"Apple pie!" Uller was elbow deep in peeled and spiced apples. Mixing chunky things like the apples was easier for him to do with his hands than anything. I really could use some lemon juice, but there was no way lemons would be this far north.

I was rolling out crust, supervising the apple mixing. Vaughan and Uller started talking about sweets. It reminded me of a time Aelin and I snuck out of our rooms and into the kitchens. There was a very small nook in the pantry where we would hide after stealing things off the counter. I wonder if she remembered.

"That blue looks so dashing on you." Vili said, entering the kitchen only to get herself another pot of tea.

Vaughan coughed. "Thank you, Uller picked it out for me."

"We match then." Vili said with a wink. I looked over her clothing, it was black dress with white and red flowers embroidered all around the cuffs. She did the needlework herself. Not one stich of blue.

"You're not wearing blue." Uller toted.

Vili smiled sweetly, the prefect smile for a lady. "My eyes I mean."

"You all have blue eyes." Vaughan turned away from us and to the bowl of apples. Vili, took that as her rejection and turned her nose up as she stalked out. She only wanted attention, but this flirting was bit too much for Vaughan.

I went back to the baking. There wasn't much left to do. Put the crust in the pan and the apples in the crust. It felt different, these last steps, having someone watch me. Uller didn't count, he was helping, well he was trying. He made things messier, but that was part of being a kid.

Every movement, I felt Vaughan staring and staring. I was paranoid. Of course, he was watching me, I was doing something in a room with no other movement. If I looked up, I bet he would be eyeing the pie. I didn't look up though. I was too nervous. I didn't want to know what he was doing. If the door to the kitchen didn't squeak I would think he had left on his silent Fae feet.

When we put the pie in the oven, Uller ran off to do something else. Leaving me alone with Vaughan. He had stopped asking me how to help, and simply did the chore that needed doing. Beating me to it, he did this now, washing the dishes. I helped, drying them and putting them away. The things he did most were the chores I dreaded. Wood chopping, and hunting. I could muck out stalls all day, groom the animals, feed them, I would garden, but wood chopping put me in a foul mood. Vili usually did all of our laundry, claiming something about her delicate clothes. I didn't like putting my hands in near burning water and left it to her, without complaint.

"I am constantly impressed with your cooking." Vaughan said suddenly, drawing me out of the routine. I took too long to say something, so I just smiled at him when I took the next bowl. "Both of my parents were warriors; my father was a blood sworn before me. I spent most of my life in war camps or out scouting. I've had more raw fish than homecooked meals. It has been a pleasure to be here."

"You're leaving?" I asked, truly shocked.

He chuckled. "No, I'll go look for Lorcan once more, but the order to find and kill him has been reseeded."

"So you'll be onto another assignment?"

He tensed at my words, soft though they were. "I don't know."

"You could stay, until you're called away." I offered, holding his gaze.

"I would like that." His candor dipped lower. "As long as my presence here isn't putting you in danger."

I latched on to the fear, I did not need to be thinking about his huskier voice. "How could that be? You can just kill anything that comes from Morath."

"Morath is not the only threat." He said, breaking away.

I wanted to roll my eyes at his dramatics. "Stay as long as it's safe then." I put down my towel and walked out. I was being stupid.


	7. Chapter 7: Looking for Lorcan, Again

**Hello all,**

 **Thank you ALL so much for the support and kind comments! I'm getting close to finals week (its week 8/10) so school has been very demanding and I haven't been working on this story as much. I will say that we are a few more chapters until things REALLY get going, I am so excited for what ya'll think! this chapter is bit on the tame side, as we have to keep the timeline up with KOA. Enjoy!**

 **Thanks for all your love and support,**

 **-Court**

* * *

 **Chapter 7: Looking for Lorcan again**

 **Vaughan:**

I flew west, south west. There had to be some clue about something. Even if I had to go into a tavern to get the information. The North was a good place hide, but it also meant any information was over a month old.

I flew over the Staghorns and to the first town with more than a few rickety buildings thrown together in one summer. Winter was deadly to mortals in the best of places.

The people here must have been more used to Fae than rest of this continent as they made no comment on my size, nor my order. I missed Holly's food. I missed her company and the intense joy of Uller. I even missed Vili flirting so terribly. It would not be good to talk people who weren't so cheerful.

I went into the tavern, the surest place to get news and gossip. I had bought the meal on purpose, to show them the money I had. "What news do you have?"

The gruff and overweight barkeep huffed. "Depends what your allegiance is."

"Against Morath." I clarified.

"Hmmm." The barkeep leaned on the counter. "That's all the living." He was skeptical, but I couldn't clarify without knowing what Maeve was up to. The people of the north were so loyal to girl who had never done anything for them. Though she won Rowan's undying loyalty in only a few months. Queen Aelin had Holly's loyalty from one playdate, so she said.

It was clear that Holly would give anything for Terrasen. She had said, when I brought up how she felt about being sold for troops, that she would marry Duke Perrington himself if it kept Terrasen safe.

"I am not a citizen of Terrasen, but I do believe in Aelin." I added at last.

The barkeep nodded. "I admire honesty." He pulled a piece of paper. "Can you read that? No one in this town can read the fancy writings."

 _Terrasen calls for all able-bodied people. To fight against the horrors of Morath, and the Valg King Erawan. No matter nationality, race, or gender you are needed. We send out this call of aid in the name of Queen Aelin Ashryver Whitethorn Galathynius, King Rowan Whitethorn Galathynuis, Prince Aedion Ashryver, Crown Prince Galan Ashryver, Queen Ansel of Briarcliff, and all of Erilea._

I read him the note. He thanked me, and muttered something to his son who, though very young tottered out of the tavern of his own accord.

"They're fighting. The battles have already begun. Queen Aelin is there sometimes, and sometimes not. My boys are all in the Bane, I was too, until General Aedion sent me home to my grandson." The man let out a rattling cough.

I took a long drink of the ale. Something I surprisingly didn't miss from my times at Holly's homestead. "Who is winning?"

"The gods will decide who wins the war." The man said. Meaning he had no idea. I thanked him and took to the skies again.

I could head south and find out more. Likely there would be information the closer the fighting, but if Morath was on the march, I didn't want to leave Holly, Vili, and Uller vulnerable. I had flown for a few days, I could make it back to them in two if I didn't stop for the night.

I caught an updraft, taking me directly back to the manor. The day Holly had split her hand protecting Uller from the ground, I had smelt something dangerously alluring in her blood. I had been drawn to that specific manor in the middle of no where for a reason. I would not, could not, leave someone I had grown to love alone if Valg monsters were marching on Orynth.

Holly was a lady, I knew that. She was likely more important than she let on if she thought she could be bartered for troops. Any significant amount would need a highborn noblewoman. She had spoken about Aelin out loud very little, but it was clear she knew her, perhaps better than most had.

I didn't need to know her last name, if I found a book on generations, I could narrow it down. It also didn't matter who she was, how much money or land she'd inherit. We could live in the stables of her majestic manor for the rest of our lives. I would marry this strong headed, brilliant girl. Even if I knew so little about her, I knew what mattered.

Our lives. I had always gone into battle knowing it could be my last day, but never had the end seemed so attainable. Holly was mortal, and even though she had no clue about my feelings, I knew her last breath would be mine.

There wouldn't be an us until after her father returned, until after she was freed of any marriage arrangements. Until she loved me.

In the chilly flight I allowed myself to delve back into my memories of Holly. She loved her horses dearly. The mare, Clipper, was pregnant. Holly spent much of her time walking the mare and carefully watching her gait and steps. There was one day where all three of the horses where let out to the small space that was clear. Holly and Uller where teaching the littlest one tricks and commands.

There was a bliss to this little family feeling safe enough, comfortable enough to have fun, to play. It was so at odds with the rest of world. Holly knew what was going, the sacrifices being made by her father, by her court, her people. It was a sweet time watching them be happy, contributing to their happiness. Even Vili had come out for that excursion, walking with Clipper dogging her steps. Racer was nibbling on whatever bit of the ground that wasn't covered in snow. It was beautiful thing to watch them be, to watch her laugh. For Uller to climb up onto my shoulders and shriek with delight when he could look Clipper in the eyes.

I wanted to be a part of their happy family. I wanted them to love me as much as I loved them all. I wanted Holly to be free to follow her heart, and I wanted her father to love me as well. I had never wanted things so domestic. I had never wooed fathers, or cared for little brothers. I had hardly ever needed to woo females. Holly seemed flattered by the attention, the help, but she was not amatory.


	8. Chapter 8: Lester Comes Calling

**Chapter 8: Lester comes to see Vaughan**

 **Holly:**

There was a lull in the raging snow. Giving us time and much needed space to walk the horses. They were getting antsy. Clipper, especially, it wouldn't be too much longer before the foal came.

I was just finishing cleaning the stalls while Vili was walking them when it became very clear there was something wrong outside.

Clipper came totting into the barn without Vili, who was yelling something I couldn't understand with the wind. Racer let out a pealing scream.

Dropping the rake, I ran past Clipper who was not pleased with the commotion. There was no injures I could see from the glance I got. At the corner, by the door, my bow and quiver sat. I hadn't touched them since Vaughan had moved here. I grabbed it up as quick as possible. I slung my quiver over my shoulder and nocked an arrow before shoving out into the cold.

Three men stood tall, holding a fourth by the arms. Little Pip.

Pip, whose mother was the mid-wife who delivered Uller. Only Pip wasn't so little, sure he was scrawny, but he was near enough a man. And he was bloody.

"Vili, get Uller and go find Vaughan." I hissed at her. Not turning my back to say the words.

I heard snow crunching. "He's not here," her warm breath hit my ear.

"Go into the woods and call for him when you are far enough away. Don't come back, I will find you or Vaughan will." I whispered back.

The middle one crowed. "Sweet, Holly. We have come to see this man that has moved in."

I didn't have to ask how they found this place. Pip was one of the only people alive who had ever been here.

The largest one on the left added, "where is he? We want to have a chat." It was not the manner of people who wanted to chat, but to kill.

"You are trespassing. Leave now." I commanded. Drawing upon every line of steel from my ancestry.

"That's not very ladylike. Invite us in, we can wait for the bloke to get back. He can't have gone far in this snow." The closest one took a few steps forward in his speech.

"He is a visitor to my estate, you were not invited. This is your last warning before I lose an arrow." I drew the bow back.

"You would shoot at me, for paying you a visit?" Lester asked, slurring.

My fingers were cold, but I shot an arrow, landing it right in the joint of his shoulder. He let out a cry of pain. "You will leave this place and forget how you got here." I said icely.

"You know, I always knew you lot were a rich, fancy people. I think its about time we take what you really owe us." He grabbed at the space between his legs.

"I don't want to kill you, but I cannot allow you return with more men. If you don't leave now, I'll have no choice but to take your life." I chose my words carefully, not letting the fear show in my voice. It had been a long time since it truly mattered how I presented myself. I should have known better than to say something in the village, especially to such a hateful man.

"You fancy yourself a noble lady, or a wildling?" One seethed. I loosed an arrow, tearing right through his throat. Then another through the man I didn't recognize. They fell to their knees, dropping Pip. There was blood gushing from their throats where the arrows stuck out. My arrows I killed them. I killed them. I killed them.

"What did you do you crazy Bitch!" Lester screamed. He couldn't return to the village. It would lead to a slippery slope where all my secrets were exposed. Somehow, I nocked a final arrow.

When he turned to run back out the gate, I shot the arrow through his heart. Pip moaned, begging for his life. He couldn't get up to leave even if he wanted to. They had injured him too badly.

I dropped my bow. I had killed with it. I had killed men.

…

 **Vaughan:**

Holly dropped her bow into the snow and then keeled over and vomited. Red stained the snow, and light was fading.

I dropped down from the air lift I had flown into, and turned back to my Fae form. Men had threatened her and had scared her. I hadn't gotten here in time. I had stopped where Vili was crashing through the forest, holding Uller wrapped in a blanket I recognized. Vili had been trading off screaming for me and panting. Uller had only tears. I had landed and turned, Vili spilt the story of what had happened, and I was off again before she had even finished. I should have known Holly would put herself in danger before her siblings. I should had known she was in danger at all.

Except she handled it. Like I had expected of her. She could do anything that needed to be done, and this, these deaths, were necessary. It still set me simmering. I would need to hit something, do something to get this fear and sense of failure out of me.

"Holly," I laid a gentle hand on her back as she heaved her supper again. She jumped, but didn't push me away. She still smelt like fear. When she stood, her eyes were watery.

"I killed them so they couldn't find us."

I nodded. "You protected yourself."

"And Pip, look what they did to Pip." Her voice cracked and croaked.

The boy on the ground was bleeding profusely, where he wasn't cut, he was bruised or broken. "He'll be on the mend for a while, but he'll heal, because of you." I gripped her hands. They were ice. "Let's get him inside and warm, then you can go find Vili and Uller." She needed direction before she fell apart.

She nodded and stumbled through the snow to Pip. I could easily carry him myself, and I did. I scooped up the skinny boy and had Holly lead us through to where she wanted him. I could tell the blood that had soaked onto him was not something she wanted on her carpets. We laid him in the stables, nicer than most inns I had stayed at. She brought blankets and medicine. I healed the open wounds and set his bones, but I wasn't a great healer, like Gavriel.

"I'll go find Vili then," she said suddenly, tearing her eyes from the pile of wet and bloody clothing we had taken off of Pip.

I handed her my cloak, "she was following the river."

Holly's hands shook while tying the front of the cloak across her shoulders. "The river, right, the river." She was saying to herself. Maybe I should just have her lay down now. She was still wide eyed, and with the bodies outside she would see them hard and cold. The blood near frozen.

The bodies were the reason I wanted her to collect her siblings. I would disintegrate them. Holly stomped her way through the snow into the forest beyond the house without a backwards glance.

Meave liked to collect powerful and pretty males. And while I'd like to say I was both of those things, she coveted me for my unique power. I could turn anything with a bit water in it to mush, to droplets. I could turn the bodies to nothing, but red with a wave of my hand. The problem would be the large red stain in the snow.

I'd have to shovel that out. Better to move the bodies as they were, then turn them to mush. I carried them beyond the front gate, and into the craggy rocky bit of the surrounding forest. Returning for each of the terrible men that had ruined this little haven. I shoveled as much red snow as I could into tin trough and dragged it far enough that the red wouldn't be seen. Better to move it before it refroze in the night.

The black horse, Racer galloped wildly around the flat area. Either the blood or the lack of women was unsettling. Upon my sixth and final trip to the dump of bodies and blood, I found that the horse had led itself back into the stables, and set to inspecting his pregnant horse girlfriend who was calmly waiting for Holly to put her back into her stall.

What oddly behaved horses they had. Surely no normal horse owner commanded this level of obedience. Even horse trainers could not get this unless they were the Daghun or the Asterin horses. The horse had to be special and the owner had to be well trained in treating horses. I suppose Holly and these three, soon to be four horses were special enough.

In my fascination with the horses, Holly, Vili, and Uller returned. Holly wrapped the blanket tightly around Uller and carried him inside. Vili came to tend the horses. I was glad that while Vili didn't like to get her hands dirty she was made with the same steel Holly had been. I was sure Uller would be just well in time.

Vili checked on Pip and stored the horses, without comment. When she gestured for us to go up to the house, I followed. "Do you love her?" Vili's cheeks were cherry red, but I doubted she was embarrassed.

"I do." There was nothing else to be said about it.

"I have never seen someone move so fast, and while you're Fae, I can't imagine you would be so…tuned in for someone you didn't care for." Vili tucked her hands into herself.

I cleared my throat, unusually tight. "You all have shown me nothing but kindness."

Vili smiled to herself. "You don't love someone for their kindness."

"Ay, but it adds up into a love for most." I told her. I had ever been in love, real love? I didn't think so, there was lust so powerful it might be called love. Holly had not given me anything but food and a few shirts and I was noticeably adoring her. Hopefully Vili noticed things that Holly didn't. I never even slept with the same female for long, and certainly never kept faith to one for very long either. Yet here I was, waiting for Holly to give me every little bit of herself, however long it took, and she would be my last.

As if she had read my thoughts, "She has no clue."

I turned serious, "make sure it stays that way." And Vili chuckled at that.

…

 **Holly:**

I forced myself to stop moving and sit. To drink tea. To warm up. I was chilled to the bone, once I let myself feel again.

Uller tucked himself into bed. The terror had taken a toll on him and he was ready for bed early. I tucked the blankets in tight all around him. Cocooning him in blankets. I set the fire high too. He had been out in the cold almost as long as I had.

When Pip woke up, he likely be mad we stripped him. We warmed him again, but he was in different clothes, warmer clothes. He'd have to stay here of course. I don't know why we didn't have his whole family staying with us before. His mother passed last winter, and his father in the first war, now all his brothers went down to join the Bane. He was too scrawny, and someone had to look after their mom. Pip had no one now.

I guess he had us.

I found myself pouring cup after cup of tea. Vili excused herself. Likely burying all of her worries in between the pages of a book or the folds of some dress.

I felt the presence of Vaughan like a blanket had been set around my shoulders.

When he sat and the cushions sank deeply. He was much heavier than me, and much too close for proprieties sake. I suppose propriety didn't matter if I had just killed three men.

"The first person I killed was a rapist, he pleaded for mercy, my queen told him that his victims had asked for the same. She ordered me to do it. There is a stream in that throne room, and his blood mixed with the water." He kept going, telling me about the throne room, about killing, about getting over it, and not really getting over it. Slowly I let myself look up. I stopped having paralyzing fears about my choice to kill. I stopped wondering about the way the red spread into the snow, I stopped hearing the sound of the arrow landing in flesh, or the gurgling of men choking on their own blood.

I started hearing about this wonderful live he had in Doranelle, about having a purpose. I wondered what it would be like to run my fingers through his hair, to kiss him. I thought about posing all my questions, even the more brazen ones about why he chose to stay here. Why would he stay here if his life with his queen was so grand, so honorable? What would it be like to live through queens and kings and see kingdoms fall and rise?

He talked until the teapot was empty and my lids were growing heavy. The fire was delightfully warm in the sitting area, and the blankets just as nice here. Slowly I slid to the side, using Vaughan as a pillow and slept. Fingers threaded through my hair moving in a soothing pattern long past when I knew they were there.


	9. Chapter 9: Pip

**Chapter 9: Pip**

 **Holly:**

As Pip recovered, we fell into a new pattern. That was life after all, constantly adjusting to a new normal over and over.

At dawn Vaughan, Uller, and I tended to things, then we cooked breakfast. The mornings were spent playing in the fresh snow. We would warm up, then eat lunch and have hot drinks, spending the rest of the day reading or playing indoors. The snow limited our playing abilities. You could only play until frostbite started to set in.

Luckily my father thought books were one of the most important commodities, we had plenty. Plenty I haven't ever gotten around to reading.

Vaughan was impressed with the little library. He took an excruciating long time looking through each title, and making a stack. He gave no reasoning for why or what he was doing. It was just a stack of books, and when Uller asked what he was doing, he gave a vague answer.

"Holly," he called from between the shelves. "Have you ever played hide and seek in the house?"

"Sometimes, but playing with two people isn't easy." I answered back. Uller was playing with his toys on the ground before the fire.

"Well, how about three people?"

Uller lit up at that idea, and we snuck out of the library without answering, knowing that Vaughan could hear us. He likely could hear us throughout the whole house. We ran down the hall, down the stairs and in into the coat closet off the main entry. The coats and their hangars pricked at me, so I crouched down to Uller's level and we waited for Vaughan.

We traded off hiding with Uller, I found them under a bed in an unused bedroom, then in the small storage space in the attic, I hid with Uller in the pantry, in Vili's room, and in the bar room. Uller then wanted to count and told Vaughan and I hide together. We hid in another abandoned room, one at the end of the hall. Even I could hear Uller calling for us as he banged into each room. Hide and seek taught him how to hide, a skill I never wanted him to need. It was better that he was prepared just in case.

I sprawled across the bare mattress, stretching out.

"Tired?" Vaughan asked from his crouch behind a chair. A ridiculous spot to hide as he didn't fit behind the chair.

"Always," I responded with a lazy grin.

He blew out a breath. "After supper you should rest then, I'll finish things up for the day."

I shook my head. No way he was going to take care of my house without me. "Maybe I'll skip the whole staying up to read by candle light thing tonight."

Ever since I killed those men I have had a hard time falling asleep. Vaughan had moved into a room on the northern wing, so he was closer, right across the hall from me and Uller. Vili liked her space, but she was closer, better protected. Even with him closer I had a hard time falling asleep without seeing the faces and the blood and the arrows. So I read until I fell asleep. I made me more tired, but likely less to relive the horrors.

…

 **Vaughan:**

Holly was doing remarkably well for someone who had killed for the first time. A little loss of sleep was normal. I wish I had gotten there just a bit faster so I could have kept her from having to do that.

She baked more, after putting Uller to bed she would knead bread until her candle burned low enough to flicker. Or she would read, which was not good for her eyes.

Tonight was different. She was truly tired. Tired of being scared all the time. Tired of pretending she was still perfect and happy. Tired of cooking meal after meal, even if she loved it so. Something had to give soon, and I hoped it was the war. I hoped her father returned and helped her. I wasn't sure how to.

After Uller went down to bed, the house was silent.

I lay thinking about my stack of books. They all had some meaning, but until Holly figured it out, I wouldn't say.

The faucet in Holly's room began drumming out water. Cutting the silence with loud splashes.

The water came out hot or cold. Something that was only common in the most advanced cities. To have this out here was amazing, and odd. Holly couldn't explain why the water was warm when the warm nob was turned, only that it was. She told there that there were many things here that shouldn't be, and I shouldn't go poking around. I took that as another one of her secrets.

The water filled the tub, I knew because the sound changed. The faucet was turned off and the water was swirled around, likely she added some soap or scent to it. Did she use a certain soap that made her smell like the wildflowers and spices, or would she smell different than usual tomorrow.

The water went still and so did the house. In the silence I swear I could hear the sound of clothes on skin. Of course, she was undressing to get in the bath. I should pick up a book or something, not listen to her bathe. Only I would still hear it—her.

The water tinkled again, a sure sign she was easing herself in. If this continued every night I might have to move back to the other wing of the house. To give her privacy and to keep myself from doing something stupid.

It might have been ten minutes of me listening to Holly soak, listening for the tiniest movements, on edge. It might have been hour before the water started draining away, or many hours. The water drained out and wet towels slapped onto the floor. Her bed creaked a few times, and that was it.

When I realized she was asleep, all the tension in my body leaked out. I was straining in areas I shouldn't have been. This attraction had to be reeled back before Holly felt uncomfortable. She was kind, not looking for someone to love. She wouldn't be able to welcome someone into her heart until she knew she could. Until the war was over and the debts were paid. If it came to that, if she was promised to someone else, I would write to Maeve and pay whatever sum, so she might love who she chose.


	10. Chapter 10: Sunny

**Hello ALL,**

 **I'm so excited for this chapter, because it means we are SOOO close to getting to the favorites coming in (their first chap will be 14!). Chapter 11 goes right together with this one so I will be posting again tomorrow! Thanks again for all of your love and support! Don't forget to message or review, I love hearing your thoughts** **more than anything.**

 **-Court**

* * *

 **Chapter 10: Sunny**

 **Vaughan:**

Clipper was due any day. Vili and Holly never left the mare alone. Holly had taken to sleeping in the stable next to the horse. Listening all night to the sounds, waking to rub her down at all hours of the freezing night.

Most horses have their young in the spring, but Hermod, their father, had many tricks that he was working on to get the breeding earlier. When the war was over, they needed a way to make money, and they couldn't do it without more horses.

Holly had shown me the extensive records of parentage. They took things very seriously, until they only had three horses. Wrecker, Racers brother was the father of the colt they already had, and this one. Racer wasn't fond of Clipper. Apparently, horses had types.

The colt, Shiny, was going to be black as night just as his father and uncle. This one coming, Holly hoped wouldn't be as pure black, she missed the variety of horses she once had.

Uller changed his mind about what he thought the foal would be every five minutes. He said the horse would be purple and green. Holly rolled her eyes and said to think of names instead of things he couldn't control. It also became apparent that Uller had named Shiny, and very young Holly had named Wrecker, Clipper, and Racer. Her signature was the -er at the end of their names. She advised Uller to keep up with his Y ending. She told me that it didn't matter what they named the horses, the owners would change them, it was ending sound they remembered, the tone of voice, they answered to.

All the anticipation was driving me up the wall. I wanted to see the baby horse. I had never seen one be born myself. It was their excitement that drove me as well, but it seemed like an important thing to have missed out on in my several hundreds of years.

Vili called from the stables for Holly, who scooped up the stack of linens that had been sitting on the dining room table all week. Water had also been sat boiling on and off, depending on how things were progressing.

Vili was trying to coax Clipper onto the ground. Holly set to helping her. They had moved Racer and Shiny to other side of the barn at the beginning of the week. Clearing out and opening the whole half of the stables for the new horse. Being able to re-open the stalls to any size was an ingenious trait.

Clipper huffed violently and Vili patted her head over and over. Telling her what a good mother she was, what Holly was doing, and hundred other things the horse would never understand. Holly was handling things further south.

Over hours, they pair of them coaxed the slimy, bloody mass from the horse. Only it wasn't just a mass, it was alive. It squirmed and explored the area around it. It nuzzled Holly and its mother. It was life.

Holly told me to go get Uller, who was delighted to meet the little horse. The foal stood upon Uller entering its space.

Seeing a horse stand for the first time, was incredible. Seeing Uller's face when the horse came to meet him, to smell him, was even better. These first's were beautiful. They were perfect.

Uller waited, letting the horse come to him. It nuzzled his hand. On wobbly legs, stumbled back to his mom. He was all black like his brother, but a white splotch on his rump, shaped like the a raying sun.

"Can I name him?" Uller asked in a whisper yell. He was excited, but knew to be calm around the new foal. Or at least was trying to be calm around him.

Holly nodded. Vili crossed her arms.

"Sunny!" He declared. Vili uncrossed her arms. Holly began cleaning herself and bit of the area.

There was new horse in this piece of paradise.

…

Everyone else had gone to bed, and yet I found myself checking in on Holly. She hadn't said she was going to sleep in the stables again, but hadn't come in yet.

I found her leaning against the metal bars of the door. Watching them sleep and be horses. They had let Shiny into the stall with them. Hoping they would get along better if they were introduced early. They had played much better than most brothers.

"It makes me feel kind of insignificant." She said softly.

I hadn't realized she noticed my approach. "New life is a precious thing across all species and races."

"It isn't the only thing we have in common." She pushed back from the bars to look at me. Did she mean in general or us?

"I think its beautiful." I smiled. They were coming more and more easily.

She didn't say anything, but just looked. Maybe she was assessing me, my smile.

"I have never wanted a family. I never wanted to raise a child who had to be skilled in killing. Seeing this, this new beginning, I feel like there just might be more goodness in the world than bad. It makes me rethink that wish for a family."

Without missing a beat, she said, "I don't think I'll ever have my own child."

"Why not?" I pressed.

Her eyes dipped to the ground. Right then, not the question to ask.

Holly pursed her lips and didn't look up. "It is a great shame for women to admit that they don't have regular cycles, it means they cannot bring heirs into the world."

I reached for her hand. "You have a sister and brother for heirs," I whispered.

Holly looked up, shocked. "Not if I'm made to marry for an alliance. What would a lord, or a prince say then, what would he say after five years or ten? I suppose it wouldn't matter as long as the war was won."

"I promise you if your lord is cruel to you, in any way, I'll kill him and anyone would rise against you or Terrasen," I swore.

Tears pooled in her eyes. "That's a very hefty promise."

"One I will keep with my dying breath."

Holly's grip tightened around my own hand. She was steeling herself for something, I didn't need years of training to know she was standing on a choice and was about to do something she had weighed heavily. "I like you, Vaughan. I would like you to always be a part of my life, but your queen will call you back soon, and my father will send me away. It is unrealistic to pretend we can be friends for too much longer, no matter how much we wish it."

I couldn't accept that. "Do you believe in fate?"

A tear leaked out of her eye. I tilted her chin up.

"The winds didn't blow me here for your cooking." My voice was hoarse. Every muscle of my body was tensed just to keep myself restrained. She smelt so good. Wildflowers and sweet spices filled my nose, filled my mind. I wanted to know if she tasted as sweet.

She was exhausted, the birth might have put her mind off of the intruders, but she still hadn't been sleeping right. I would have to send her to bed for all of our sakes.


	11. Chapter 11: Blue Blood

**Chapter 11: Blue Blood**

 **Holly:**

Vaughan's fingers were so gentle on my chin. Making me look at him, because I needed to. I needed to tell him the truth. No matter how it made me feel, he needed to know.

And fate. Yes, that seemed to be the right word for whatever this was. Him being here. The war happening. If there was a future for us, it would be one I would like very much. More than I would ever admit, especially to myself. I knew the heartbreak of accepting this blooming romance only to have to move to the southern continent or the Western wastes would destroy me more than almost anything else. In the end I would give anything, if meant keeping Uller and Vili safe, keeping all the children of Terrasen safe.

I leaned back. We were getting too close.

With everyone else in bed, the booming sound of wings drew my attention. Just as easy for me to hear as Vaughan.

I dove for the torches along the stables dropping them into buckets of water. If they couldn't see the lights, they would fly over the manor.

Vaughan ran from the stables, likely to the house. When the lights were out in the stables, I snatched up my bow and quiver, dust had once again collected on them, and quietly as I could, shut the stable doors.

Outside of the walls, there was the little to dull the sound of the wings. Or the terrible reptilian screech that grated against my ears.

I nocked an arrow. And looked around. They were close too close. Our little spot had been well hidden from prying eyes, but from aerial views we were a clear target.

A wyvern, no, three wyverns circled the manor. Terrible dark riders atop their mounts.

"Holly," Vaughan screamed. I whirled and forth dropped from the sky right at me. The great beast's mouth was wide open. I shot an arrow through the roof of its mouth and hopefully through it head. Even if my arrow did hit through the bone, muscle, and sinew, it didn't stop its great momentum. I rolled to the side before it could crash into me.

The beast drove into the ground, its spiked tail whipping wildly. I got my feet under me, and ran.

I shoved through the front door of the manor.

"Vili, Uller." I screamed. "Pip!"

They were already up. Tugging shoes on.

A guttural scream came from outside, the only male sound belonging to Vaughan.

"We can't keep running. Those are witches and wyverns they will find us." Vili argued. She hefted Uller, who was crying.

"One wrong lash from their tail will destroy the house. We don't have a choice but hide in the forest." I shouted at her, grabbing little shoes and shoving them onto Uller.

"It's the middle of winter. We will freeze." Pip said snatching blankets from the couches.

"We are not arguing. GO." I pushed them to the kitchen, to the back door.

Another scream from out front. Pip paled. Vili only gripped him by the arm and hauled ass into the forest.

Four on one, or rather eight on one. I couldn't leave him, even if I could only shoot an odd arrow. I took the stairs two at a time. All the way up to the highest level. I pushed open the window and took aim. The witches weren't looking at me. They thought we ran or were huddled in the corner.

I couldn't. I wouldn't let Vaughan defend this place alone. There wasn't enough room in the clearing for all four of the witches to land. Indeed, the one I had shot at was dead. The rider hacking at Vaughan, ax and sword, against two mighty swords.

I pushed the window open slowly, careful not to draw attention. Two were circling above, waiting for room or opportunity. They had correctly prioritized Vaughan as the real threat.

I sighted one when they began their circle again. I pushed out a breath and fired. I sighted the other in the air. The wyvern, under the rider I had shot, was none the wiser.

In the moment I loosed the next arrow, Vaughan unleashed himself. The wvyerns, throats were turned to puddles. The riders still in the air were crunched under their falling mounts.

The first unseated rider was the only one remaining. She took her bow, still secured from her back and turned from Vaughan. She took aim. At me. Shit. Before I could even process moving the arrow thunked into the eaves, scraping the side of my head.

Vaughan called after me. I couldn't breathe much less think of a reply. He pulled himself up onto the first roof, then scaled the next. He was covered in black and blue blood.

Blue blood of witches.

My mother had blue blood, as Marion Lochan had. They were friends even if Marion was a Blackbeak, and my mother half Crochan. A quarter witch. I was a quarter witch. My mother's witch blood gave her the ability to create life over a few decades.

I didn't bleed blue. I wasn't a witch.

Vaughan touched his fingers to the side of my head. The first red to join the sticky masses on him.

"Come." He said and guided me from little window. He sat me on the main couch and pressed a cloth to my head. My vision swan, black dots faded in out.

…

"Holly," Vili's face came into view. I blinked the grogginess from my mind. My mouth was ashen though. I couldn't say anything. "I'm going to put Uller to bed, then lay down myself. Do you need anything?"

I shook my head. I was supposed to take care of her, not the other way around. She pressed a cup of tea into my hands and left, sweeping away with her bundled blankets and nightgown.

I knew it was him before he even sank into the cushions. "You shouldn't have come back."

He pulled the blanket off of me, and rose to help me up, while I groaned, "you shouldn't have to fight by yourself."

He quirked a smile. "You aren't much of a fighter." I gripped his hands tightly, needing help to stand.

"True. One little scrape and I stopped functioning." and I was up. Woozy, and wobbly. Vaughan banded his arms around me, and I leaned into his embrace. I was a lovesick fool.

"It wasn't little. She nearly killed you." He kissed the side of my head, right above the mark.

"I'll be fine." I whispered back.

"Because I healed you." He brushed his lips against my head again. "Let's get you to bed."

I could tell he wanted to just scoop me up and carry me to bed. I made it myself though, all the way up the stairs, and to my room at the end of the hall.

He lit the fire in my room, and tried to tuck me into bed.

"Goodnight, I'll be across the hall if you need anything."

"Stay." I blurted. It wasn't the blood loss talking, I think.

He turned back and leaned he braced his hands on the bed on either side of me. Drawing very, very close to my face. I set a blank look on my face as he said, "it isn't proper."

"I don't care." I said evenly.

He didn't move, not closer, nor further. I wish I knew what he was thinking.

He blew out a breath, and crossed to the other side of the bed. I burrowed into his side as close as I could get. Grateful for his warmth, and his nearness.


	12. Chapter 12: Winter

**Chapter 12: Winter**

 **Holly:**

"Have you seen the waterfall upstream a mile or two?" Vaughan asked suddenly.

I shook my head. I didn't like leaving the manor, at least going too far from it. I wasn't sure if I was more worried about being spotted by people or animals.

"Let's go then. It's frozen and beautiful." He propped his head in hand, and looked wistful.

I couldn't help my smile. I never could help smiling, not around him at least. We were still in bed. I had asked Vaughan to stay that night, and every night after. We may have been sleeping in the same bed, but we had yet to even kiss properly.

"Pip has taken on most every chore, and you have cooked a glorious meal last night, that will be just as good tonight." He continued.

I sighed through my nose. "I'll get a coat and Uller then."

"No, just us." He said quickly.

It was the first time he ever excluded Uller. Even when my brother came banging into my room every morning he helped burrow him into the blankets between us. My life revolved around the boy. Maybe I should have a break, only for an hour or two.

This far North, it was hard doing anything. Another reason I rarely left our plot of land. My father had had the land leveled, seeded with good soil, and number of other things. It was the odd patch of flat in this part of the foothills to the backs of the Staghorns. If you wanted flat land this far north you had to be very rich, or move all the way to the tundra by the North Sea.

Vaughan held tightly to my hand, likely just as afraid I was going to fall into the frozen river as I was. The top of the river was frozen, and I might be able to walk on the edges, but falling would be too heavy an impact. The ice would shatter, and I might freeze myself.

The wind didn't whip us about, and the rocks held firm as we continued upstream, to the waterfall. Vaughan talked much of the time. Telling me about places he had seen in his many years, about his group of warrior friends, about his mother.

He told me about Doranelle and all the wonderful things I would never get to see. He also told me about the bad. He never sugar coated the places, never made them seem like a utopia, but rather a real place. Places with high poverty once you stepped off the main roads, with hateful people, with rotten rulers.

There was no prefect place he claimed over and over, but this little patch of paradise that we lived on. I didn't have the heart to tell him that I would much rather be down in the freezing mud with my friends. Fighting for my country. I couldn't admit to him that I was terrified of the day he left to go explore these places on orders of his queen.

He painted a pretty picture, even with the flaws woven in, but he made it clear there had always been something missing.

Vaughan led me right to where the river started. A great rockyface rose up, and from it, water would spill. Only it wasn't spilling right now. The water had frozen as it fell. Leaving twisting streams of icicles. Sunlight twisted and shattered through the ice. It was beautiful.

The waterfall was easy to climb up the side. We did, and it gave way to another view. Vaughan might have been looking for his cadre member, but he had found far more in the north.

I sat in the light padding of snow and leaned on his shoulder. It was more to steal his warmth than anything.

The trees were dusted with snow, the river cutting a path through them that you could just barely trace back to the bare spot where the manor was. To the south was the giant Staghorn's. I had spent half my life staring at them from one side, and the other half staring at them from this angle. Would I remember how they looked from Orynth? Here the Staghorn's cradled us on three sides, in Orynth they present more of straight, dividing line.

"What are you thinking about?" His fingers wiggled into mine, just as warming as his voice.

I sighed deeply, "the future."

"Cryptic enough?" He joked.

"I have been dreading and wishing for the day news comes." I clarified. "There are a hundred things that could happen, and I don't know what to do in any of those futures."

"Neither do I."

That's not reassuring, I almost blurted. It was the truth though. I didn't want him to start feeling like he had to say what he thought I wanted to hear. I would always prefer the truth. We sat in silence after that.

As long as the living won the war, we would be alright. As long as the Valg were sent from realm, even if it had to be one at a time, we would be alright. Any other circumstance we could deal with. I could deal with.

Settled, somewhat, my mind turned to the very warm body pressed into my side. It turned and wandered. Vaughan was a Fae male, he was huge compared to me, and terribly muscular. We may have been sleeping in the same bed, but our touching was limited.

And now…

By the Gods, he would notice my heartrate beating so insane. He would notice my breathing. I struggled to force out even tempered breaths. It wasn't like I had never kissed anyone. It had been awhile. It had been a decade. I had kissed Ren and Aedion more times than I could count. They were child's play though. For a long time, I was under the impression that I would marry one of them, so the kissing was premediated. It was a foolish child pretending. Did it count, though?

All I had to do to kiss Vaughan was turn my head and tilt my chin up. He was so, so very close. I should do it. There was no harm to a kiss, and if I wanted to. I really wanted to kiss him. Maybe he felt me teetering on the decision, but he didn't show any reaction.

I sucked in a light breath, turned my head, tilted my chin up. I stretched my finger into the near stubble on his chin. He certainly knew what I was thinking now. He lowered his face to mine so tenderly. I didn't want to pull away or drop my hand. But one kiss can only last so long.

He shifted in the snow, drawing me closer. "I've been waiting for you to do that for months." Months seemed a bit since had only been here for two.

His eye crinkled. They were so dark, a different world than the one we lived in. "Well, I'm not sure what can come of it." I forced myself to say.

"I'm sure we could do that again." He quirked his brow.

I couldn't help to hide my smirk. "A few more times, yet."

He shifted my hips, my body to have better access, "Holly, you're far more precious than anything else in all the worlds." He kissed me again, and it did not end until the sun started to dip behind the Staghorns.


	13. Chapter 13: Binds and Bonds

**Chapter 13: Binds and Bonds**

 **Vaughan:**

A sharp pain, fiercer than any I had ever felt cut through my chest. I let out a bellow that set any animal around running.

There was no blood, there was no wound. What was hurting so utterly bad?

I fell to the ground. Something was wrong. Something was wrong all the way to my soul.

Mates could feel each other's pains. I had never thought Holly was my mate, but if I could feel her pain then- I shot off the ground. I was a mile from the house. There was no way I could fly or run fast enough to stop Holly from bleeding out.

But still, I ran. Every breath was laced with pain. Holly. Holly. Holly.

When the house came into view, I screamed for her, for them. She could not die, she could not.

Pip came flying out of the barn. His fear wafting into my nose. Uller, unhurt and right behind him. Holly's scent was all over the house, I wasn't sure where she was. She had said she was going to bathe while I was out. I shoved through the little kitchen door and ran up the stairs.

The door to her bathing room was locked. I pushed it in with little thought or energy.

Holly was fine she was franticly drying herself so she could see what all the fuss was. I tried to breathe. I tried to calm myself. I had never known such fear.

She wrapped the towel around herself tightly. "What's wrong," she demanded.

I couldn't speak. I couldn't function from the overwhelming mix of lingering pain and relief. The floor was soaked. It looked like she dumped the tub onto the floor trying to get covered to see what was wrong.

"Vaughan," she said sternly. She wasn't angry. She was scared.

"I felt something. I thought you were trouble." I got out.

She looked bewildered. "I'm fine." Holly reached for my hand and sat me on the edge of the bed. She gave me time to order my breathing, my heart rate. "The problem is, if you felt something, and it wasn't me who was hurt, then who was it?"

Maybe she wasn't my mate. Even if loving her wasn't something I had really chosen, it was fated. A piece of my heart, of my soul would be hers whether we were or not. There was no one I was so bound with but…I had given away a piece of my soul, given away control of my soul to Maeve. I had forgotten about Maeve in the paradise of this land, I had forgotten about her because of Holly.

She had ripped the blood oath from me. That's what this pain was, her bond was gone. The blood oath was gone. I had myself back, my full heart was mine once again.

Holly stood there the whole time, wrapped in a towel, dripping onto the polished floors. Waiting for me to say something, to ask for something.

I knew that if the blood oath was then, well… Maeve was selfish and loved to horde things.

Maeve would never free me of the blood oath willingly. She was dead. My queen was dead.

…

 **One month later:**

We had long since gone to bed. Holly had rolled over, curling into a tiny ball that I tucked as many blankets around as possible. It was cold night. I got up and added blankets to Uller and Vili as well.

I couldn't sleep.

Of all the futures I had dreamt of, never had they been so freeing. Never had I gotten out of the blood oath. Never was I free to be with Holly.

Holly had accepted my excuses without much question.

I had to tell her the truth, only I didn't know it. Not all of it. I had to find it out. I wouldn't be able to rest until then.

I prodded Holly repeatedly. "My love, I need you to wake up."

She cracked her eyes open sleepily, a look of drowsy amusement pulled at the corners of her mouth. "My love, that's a new one."

"What would you prefer me call you?" I asked automatically.

"Why did you wake me?" she leveled a look at me. No nonsense.

"I need to tell you something."

She shifted more, propping herself so she might give me her full attention.

"I figured out what the pain I felt was." I started. Holly's eyes went wide. "The blood oath to Maeve was severed."

"Is that a good thing?" She scooted closer, if that was even possible. Eager to hear my plans and thoughts.

I nodded. Maeve will never be the thing that causes us to part. "I want to know what happened. I want to know what is happening with the war."

Holly twisted my dark hair, which had grown long in the winter months, "will you wait to leave until I can write some letters?"

"You're not going to beg me to stay." I kissed her hand, her cheek, her lips. Gods, she was soft.

She stretched, catlike. "I don't want you think you have to sit around here and protect me."

I fought myself to withdraw my hands from her. "That's not why I also want to stay." I said huskily.

She smiled tightly. She knew I needed leave, knew it had to be soon, but didn't fault me for needing that information for leaving her.

I looked to the stack of books I had put together. I had set them on one of the nightstands in Holly's room. I looked at the titles of the books. One on top the next. Books I would never read. Reading wasn't why I had put them together. The day Holly had kissed me for the first time I had rearranged them somewhat, lining the first letter of each title up to spell out something.

"I can't leave until you figure out why I stacked the books like I did." I kissed the tip of her nose.

She rolled her eyes, "they have been sitting there for a month. I don't think I'm going to figure it out tonight, or ever."

"I'll give you one hint." I offered.

"You're lucky the fire is still high enough I can see them." She moved so she could see them better, rolling halfway over me.

"Only pay attention to the titles." I said with a kiss to her temple.

She stretched again, a move for her brain as much as her limbs. She surveyed the books with scrutiny. "Watery battles and their advantages, Ice capped love stories, Lost in the woods book 7, Lost in the woods book 3, Yulemas at the palace traditions of Terrasen, Orlon the next great king, Uses of the raw catch, Marriage under the Gods, Archery wins throughout history." She huffed a breath. "I don't understand, they are my father's history books mostly, and the survival books Cal Lochan sent with us. They don't have a pattern."

"It's not a pattern, it's a clue that spells something out." I proffered.

She gave me an annoyed look. "There is no word that goes W-b, Watery battles." She started, trying again. "So, W-I, Watery Ice. W-i-l-l-y-o-u-m-a-r-r-y-m-e." realization settled into her face even before she done spelling it out. "Those have been around forever."

"Aye. You didn't answer the question." I huffed.

"I would like nothing more. But until news of what my father bargained to help increase our chances, I-I can't accept." Tears filled her eyes.

I drew her closer, face to face. "Another reason I'm desperate for news."

"I love you." She said with a kiss.

"I love you more." I answered.

Holly worked quickly. Drawing out parchment, pens, and her seal. I hadn't even known she had her own seal.

By the fire light she wrote three letters. One to Lady Elide Lochan of Perranth, One to her father, and a third to give to any number of people depending on if I couldn't deliver either of the first two letters.

Holly talked while she wrote. "I only want Elide to know I am alive, she will convince them to ride north, and only then will they know I am here, alive."

"Why the secrecy?" I asked, sitting on the edge of the desk.

She creased the envelope with a firm hand and poured the wax on it. "It's a game that we girls used to play, surprising each other. Elide will facilitate this for me, and you too I suppose."

"It is an honor to help the Lady Eldostrom." I picked up the sealed envelopes, the crest was clear. An oak tree, with the back ground aflame.

She handed me the last letter. "Don't go calling me that, just yet." She reached for my chin, and I leaned into her hand. "I will miss you." She breathed.

Dawn was breaking and I wanted to get going soon. Daylight was a valuable thing.

"I will miss you more than anything." My throat got too tight to get the words out fully.

Holly pushed out of her chair and into my arms. Her mouth was on mine. Her arms around my neck. My arms around her waist. There nothing in the world but the desk I pressed against, and Holly. Holly and her body, her lips, her hands.


	14. Chapter 14: OSPREY

**Hello all,**

 **The time frame might be just a bit wonky, but let's just go with it alright?**

 **Towards the very end of KOA, there is a part where the fae males of the court 'sniff the air and grin' after Aelin says something about 'training the next generation of magic users'. Or something along those lines. A page later she blushes about having kids with Rowan so…. I haven't seen anyone talking about it, but I am convinced that means she pregnant. So, I'm taking that and running with it! Even though she will be pregnant in the story, I would love to know if you think that I'm reading too much into it or if you** **agree with me.**

 **Check out pages 949/950 of KOA for what I'm talking about!**

 **Thanks always for the love and support!**

 **Happy reading,**

 **Court**

* * *

 **Chapter 14: Osprey**

 **Elide:**

It took a while for everyone to leave Orynth. I had made several trips to Perranth and back during that time. It was King Dorian, Yrene, and Chaol who left last, saying the longest goodbyes, even though they would move closest.

The road of rebuilding would be difficult. There was no money, and no one to loan it either. Adarlan had no money to gift back, the witches had done something with it, no one knew, not even Manon. Tough many of the witches had flown off, not willing to follow Manon, and likely those missing witches had the money.

I walked the castle and city battlements as often as I could. It was important for me to see that the bodies were gone, the blood washed away. It was important to remember too. I also marked spots in need of repair.

Aedion would have done it, but he was busy with wedding preparations, and a hundred court things that I couldn't help with. Lorcan might have been teaching me to read, but it was a slow process, and legal letters were not where to start.

The big news, Aelin told me before she even hinted to the others. I didn't have a prenatural sense of smell, but for a week Aelin had been pregnant, and told not a soul, but me. She had been waiting for them to ask, to smell it and ask. Apparently Chaol's wife, Yrene had thrown that off quite a bit.

It was exciting. It was a new beginning.

"My wife." Lorcan said, coming from behind me.

"My husband." I answered back, leaning into his arms. It was still very, very cold.

He breathed in my scent, our scent now. "Any daring plans for tonight?"

"None I can think of. Dinner, with everyone." I amended. Standing with a brilliant view of the Staghorns.

"Do you see that?" Lorcan asked a note of worry in his voice, that set me looking for the thing. He pointed at a white speck soaring straight at us.

"A bird." I clapped his arm.

"Vaughan." Lorcan murmured. "Go, go get Rowan and Fenrys, or Aedion. Aelin if she'll come." He pushed me from him and towards the stairs, with a sharp voice.

I ran down the stairs, taking them as fast as my ankle would allow. I swung up onto a horse that was parked nearby, a little thing. Only the little horses survived the war, the larger ones were broken on the battle field.

The clopping of hooves on the stone road echoed in my mind until the castle proper came racing up to meet me.

A groom took my reins, but I shouted to the guards on the top step, they could run faster than I could. "Fetch King Rowan, and Fenrys. Now."

I would wait here. Likely they weren't in the same places.

"What's wrong?" one asked.

"Nothing you can help with unfortunately." I raised my chin. I didn't need to broadcast that there was a potentially hostile and powerful high Fae coming here.

"Will you be needing your horse again, milady?" The groom asked, tentatively.

"Mostly likely." I said evenly. Either I would or Aelin.

The groom took several steps away despite my information. "I will stand over there so as to not overhear."

"Thank you." I said without looking over at him. Rowan and Fenrys had to know there was a threat, quickly.

"Elide?" Rowan asked, turning from his hawk form. I hadn't even seen him.

"Vaughan is at the battlements, Lorcan saw him and sent for you and anyone who isn't busy." I said quickly.

Rowan crossed his arms, shifting his weight and gaze towards the battlements. "Is he hostile?"

"I left before he got close. I think we would know if they were fighting though." I informed him. Fenrys bounded towards us, in wolf form. Rowan sent more guards in for Aelin to be brought to the battlements. He would want her to decide about to do with him.

Then he and Fenrys took off towards Lorcan. I had the groom fetch Aelin's horse.

She could easily walk to the battlements, but I could not. She would want to ride with me.

…

They were arguing when we pulled the horses to a stop. We hadn't ridden with much speed. On Aelin's suggestion.

Rowan would likely just kill Vaughan if she came near and he was still a threat.

Indeed, all of his weapons had been discarded on the ground, far from his reach.

"You are?" Aelin asked, lazy, snarky.

The male stood straighter, taller. He was taller than Lorcan. "Vaughan, former blood sworn to Maeve."

"Where have you been?" She asked without concern.

"In the north." He still studied her.

"Where in the north?" She met his gaze for the first time.

Vaughan seemed to huff a breath, exasperated or annoyed. "There are no names where I was."

"Fine, what were you doing in the North?" Aelin amended.

"I was staying at a manor house," He paused, then, "with the girl I love."

Fenrys crossed his arms, and went on the attack. "You were so far north there were no towns, but you were in a manor house?"

"I was told it was very expensive. I was also told it built when Adarlan started testing its power, as an escape house." Vaughan then took to analyzing me. Lorcan growled just a bit.

"Alright, I accept that. Who is this manor owner?" Aelin asked with a wave her hand. She was acting bored, annoyed, cold.

Vaughan crossed his arms in response to her seeming indifference. "I was asked to only tell Lady Elide Lochan."

"Why?" Several of us asked at once.

Vaughan lifted his hands up to show he didn't quite understand. His lover had asked for this though, not him.

I narrowed my eyes. "A game of identities."

"Surprise I think." He corrected, then leveled a look at me. "I have a letter, for you to read, but only you."

I extended my hand. He reached into his tunic. It was a pretty blue. The letter was a little crumpled. The seal was in prefect shape. I knew it immediately.

The shock turned my voice cold. "Where did you get this?"

"What is it?" Lorcan asked, peering over my shoulder. He wouldn't recognize it, though.

"The owner of the manor gave it to me." Vaughan crossed his arms.

"That's not possible." There was no way. There was no way she was alive, no way she was his mate, even if he hadn't said the word it must be true. There was no way the cadre matched up with us ladies like that. I took a step away from the others. I broke the seal, careful to leave it intact as much as possible.

 _Elide,_

 _I know what you're thinking, how are you alive?_

 _Well the fire was fake. The manor Vaughan talks of is real. It's real and you all were supposed to be here. More than just me waits for you here. Please, please convince them to join me in the north, I swear you will not regret it. I told Vaughan little about our game of surprises, but I would love it if you could convince to come north without telling them why. Good luck!_

 _With all my love,_

 _Holly_

I couldn't read every word for certain. It took me much longer than I intended, but the seal was right. Holly had drawn a horse right next to her signature, what she used to do on all her lessons until the tutors smacked her hands for it. The only time she was ever punished. Even if she did plenty things as devious as Aelin.

"Aelin, I know you've been quite stressed, how about a trip north." I asked after I finished it a second time.

"You want me to just drop everything and go north." She looked between Vaughan and me.

"I swear, you won't regret it." I brandished the letter, but didn't let her read it.

"I'll have to leave Aedion in charge then." She sighed, more to herself.

"No!" I said far too quickly. "He has to come as well."

Aelin raised a brow.

"Everyone has to come." I clarified.

"Not lord Darrow." She moaned.

I shook my head. "No, Ren, Aedion, you, me, Ravi, and Sol."

The names where telling ,but it was what Holly wanted. "Why?" Aelin asked.

"Can't tell you." I tucked the letter away for emphasize.

"Elide, now is not the best time," She started but I cut her off.

"Now is the perfect time, you aren't far enough into your pregnancy for that to be an issue, you have sent out the initial orders to begin construction, the snows are melting, and you have to go Suria for that event. Go north from there, and we only have to stay a few days. Plus, you want to get out of the castle. And it give the decorators more time get the living quarters-"

"Alright, we can go." She flashed me a grin, hidden from the others. She needed to get out of here, even I had to convince her to actually go. A crown was another sort of shackle and she needed a break. Holly's return would solve a lot of problems, she would the last vote we needed when it was split, and she would have been studying more than the rest had an opportunity to.


	15. Chapter 15:Racing North (MY FAV CHAP)

**Hello All,**

 **This is My FAVORITE CHAPTER,** SO It couldn't wait to post it! W **ell the second half is my favorite! You'll see! Thanks for all the support!**

 **Enjoy,**

 **Court**

* * *

 **Chapter 15: Racing North**

 **Aelin:**

Lysandra was pissed about having to leave all the wedding preparations in the hands of someone other than herself. I told her she could always postpone her wedding even further or stay. Neither choice was amendable. Whatever this thing Elide insisted we go see was, it had better be good.

Even a week after leaving Suria, Lysandra was still angsty. Snipping at Aedion mostly, he had heard Elide insisted he come and had ignored every word from Lysandra about staying. I had a feeling it also had to do with me being pregnant. Not that I was very far along, but it did complicate things. Mostly it was Rowan it complicated. He had been a territorial bastard, but now he growled whenever some male drew near. Particularly the ones that weren't blood sworn to me. Ren and Vaughan were the only ones this far north, but still.

Vaughan had made some heavy allusions to who his lover was, but I still had no idea who they were. Elide didn't have many friends until recently. Whoever his lover was, she was most likely human. But settling down was the opposite of everything Fenrys had told me about him. His lover was likely someone from Terrasen court, specifically Perranth court. I was desperate to figure it out before. I didn't like the surprises not including me.

"I heard you were quite the ladies' man-or male." I started, drawing my horse up to the front where he walked. Vaughan did not use a horse, he either used his two feet or his wings.

"I had a reputation in Doranelle, yes." He huffed.

"Whoever your lover is must be very lucky then." I jested.

"I am the lucky one." He said too quickly.

I chuckled. "In regards to sex or other reasons?"

"We haven't." He said, aloof. I didn't know if he was joyous at my incessant prodding or the idea of his eventual return to this girl. "I know you will keep asking until I tell you who she is, but you'll have be stated with just that bit of information instead."

Gods! Who was she?

The expression clanged through my mind even more than just the exasperation. I had killed the gods. I had incinerated them. They would never return to their homes or mine. People didn't know they were gone and still used the expression, still attended vigils, maybe it was more out of habit than anything.

There was great debate about rebuilding the only slightly destroyed temple. It was only a debate between me and Rowan. The temple wasn't just a place of the gods, my ancestors, my parents had been married there. I was blessed there. A thousand years of family events had taken place there, but no longer did we need to worship bearers of our fate.

Rowan wanted me to give it a remodel, making it place for the people to go who were in need. I wanted it to be the same, but without the gods, how could it. Maybe this girl would have all the answers to the tough problems I wrestled with.

Travelling was also good for me. Being queen and being pregnant limited my time outdoors, limited my training, exercise. Riding, and riding relatively hard for weeks awakened my soul.

…

 **Aelin, 14 Years ago:**

The horse race was stupid.

I wasn't even allowed to compete.

Elide wouldn't sit with me, she was too afraid after I had burned the rose bushes when Ren punched Aedion.

Holly had kissed Aedion's bruised cheek though. Holly got to compete. Holly got to wear pretty outfits when she competed, but mom and pa never let me, never bought me riding clothes.

I had a nice horse, as nice as Holly's. My horse was golden, Holly's was white. Who would ever want a plain horse next to my golden one.

Yet Holly rode up and down the track to applause. She would make a better princess too, everyone liked her, no one was scared of her. Even Aedion liked her better.

"Stop it!" I screeched at him when his head turned to follow Holly's progress.

"We are here to watch Holly. Don't you want you want to see it if she falls?" Aedion asked quietly.

And that, well, yes, I did. Seeing Holly fall would be the best thing to happen in a hundred years!

"I hope she flies over the top of her horse!" I cheered.

"Hush, Fireheart, that's not kind." My father chided.

A loud shoot rang out and Holly's time was started. Her little figure bounced up and down with the thundering of the horse. She must have an incredibly strong grip to not fall off. She would be very hurt if she did fall though.

Suddenly I didn't want her falling, she wasn't afraid of me, and Aedion liked her. Not having her around wouldn't be what I wanted, just that she shouldn't be better than me at things.

Her horse took the corner sharply and Holly let go and grabbed the first flag, shoving it onto the pole she held in the other hand. The horse seemed to not need direction, and as she attached the flag it came around to the second one. Holly snatched the flag, not holding on at all. The crowd shrieked and clapped.

The horse rounded on the next turn and Holly raised the two flagged pole high, earning more applause.

She snatched the third flag and her horse hit the turn hard. I could see how slanted he got to make the tight turns so fast.

Holly had to drop the little pole into a small hole at the speed she was going. I had seen her practice, but never had she been going so fast.

The horse she rode went faster and faster, speeding right towards me.

Holly was going too fast to fit the flagpole into the hole. She would lose! I closed my eyes, just when I thought I could be her friend, she goes and makes a silly mistake. The crowd sucked in a tight breath and squeezed my eyes tighter.

Cheers erupted all around, it was deafening.

Aedion, Pa, and Mom were all on their feet shouting with glee.

Holly was the last rider, and so on the blackboard across the pitch, her time was being written. It was the smallest number, the smallest time.

Holly had won. The youngest competitor had beat out warriors and her own father.

The Lord Eldostrom lifted his daughter from the horse and set her down to lead the horse to the ceremony.

I pulled between mom and pa, I wanted so desperately see Holly. I would have her be my friend. She could teach me about horses, and we could have tea, and read together. She would be much nicer than Aedion or Ren.

Down on the field, Ren was already there, handing Holly flowers. She seemed draped in flowers. Did winners of horse races always get so many? Her mother held some, her horse had a blanket of flowers, there were so many, all different colors.

Aedion gave her the large sunflower he had brought. She thanked him absently, struggling with all the praise.

"You made me a richer man, little girl." Lord Lochan said clapping her on shoulder. Holly gave little Elide one bouquet of flowers.

"Holly!" I screamed and ran to hug her. I smashed the flowers a bit, but didn't mind. Holly was going to be my best friend. She would do what Lady Marion did for my mother.

"I want you to be my best friend." I declared.

"I can't, I already promised Elide she would be my bestest friend." Holly's eyebrows raised so high.

"I am your princess, you have to be my friend." I argued.

"What if we all were friends?" Elide asked pulling the petals out of the flowers nervously.

"That's sounds good!" Holly chirped and promptly dropped the flowers to hug us both.

"Forever!" I screamed.

"Forever!" Elide and Holly echoed.


	16. Chapter 16: The Arrival

**Chapter 16: The Arrival**

 **Aelin:**

It had been a long trek and I was more interested in a hot bath than whatever tantalizing thing they had in store.

Each day Vaughan would fly further than we could see. I wondered if he would leave us in the wilds to find ourselves out. Though each day when he returned, he spoke softly to Elide, who would then tell us all how far away we were.

On this return, Elide announced there was a decision to be made. We could camp tonight and then reach the destination in the morning, or we could continue on in the dark for another couple hours to the destination. My query was whether there would be baths and beds. Elide looked to Vaughan, who, for one of the only times I had seen it, smiled and said there would be, and that there would be good food too.

No one argued after that, and we loaded back up on the horses and headed into the darkening North.

The dense trees gave way to a beautiful iron wrote gate. With metal horses and flowers twinning. The gates weren't locked, only closed. Whoever this belonged to had built a small manor, as manors go. The stables were nearly as big as the house, sitting in plain of view of all the windows.

A small garden patch that looked ready to plant lay to the side of the entry's walkway. Vaughan led us into the stables. Even more impressive inside. The wood and the cement floors looked as if it had been built recently, not more than a decade ago. There were only four horses in the stables. Strange, maybe there was more in a different section of the building.

Vaughan, who had opted not to ride a horse, showed us where to house them.

"I'll go wake our host." He said with a calm cadence, but practically ran out of the stables, towards the manor.

Rowan helped me down from the horse, then led the beast into its stall. Everyone was tired. I shot a glance to Lysandra, still in Ghost leopard form. She ignored me. Whoever this host was, she didn't trust it. Perhaps it was Vaughan she didn't trust.

Ren was inspecting the other horses. Vaughan hadn't said we had to stay in the stable, but it seemed like he intended us to. Maybe Ren was trying to figure out who lived here before Elide shared.

The only sound was the creaking of leather straps and hay being stepped on. So, when the shout when through the night, even Ren and Elide straightened. Doors slammed then there was the unmistakable sound of bare feet thundering down stairs.

Another door was banged open then, "ELIDE." The voice was worried and that set everyone reaching for their weapons, but Elide. Elide moved towards the shout, almost to the door where Vaughan had slipped out when another figure, likely the owner of the voice, slammed into her.

They wrapped their arms around each other and the force of it caused them to topple.

Breathlessly, the girl, as that was all I could tell about her in the dim stables repeated "I can't believe you're here. I can't believe you're alive." I couldn't tell much about her, not with her latched around Elide. Lorcan was standing right next to Elide, unsure what to do. And the girl was just a glint of golden hair and female body, quite bare for a night in the north. Any hope of figuring out who she was, as I was sure I did know her, was lost when Aedion pushed Lorcan aside and caught the girl's attention.

"Aedion," She cried, and launched herself at him. He caught her and lifted her up and spun her around. That was enough intimacy to set Lysandra to shifting. I noticed how Vaughan's dark eyes glinted at the intimacy as well. He held a coat loosely, waiting for her to detach.

Ren, who was also closer, seemed to figure the puzzle out. As soon as Aedion set her down, Ren took his hug. The girl leaned back from his embrace, holding Ren at arm's length. "Oh, Ren, I always knew you would be more handsome than Aedion." She laid hand on the bottom of his scar, just brushing his jaw.

There was only ever one girl who preferred Ren over Aedion.

"Holly?" I asked. Her attention flicked to me, then to my slightly swollen belly.

"Of course, you're still the prettiest of us." She wiped at her tears and then approached, albeit slower. She gripped me in a tight hug, and I felt tears pricking my eyes. She was alive. She was alive. Our court was whole.

"I didn't realize Elide's surprise would make me cry so much." I coughed.

Holly smirked. "Oh, I'm not the surprise, I've just been looking after it."

"What?" Half of the group asked. Elide among them.

"I'll tell you about it in the morning. You all smell like the road. I'll warm something up while you all bathe." She gripped my hand tightly and looked around.

"Holly," Vaughan proffered the jacket. Indeed, she was wearing her nightgown, and was barefoot. She smiled shyly but slipped her arms into the holes of the jacket.

"Vili will be very pleased to see you." Holly said pointedly to Aedion. Who cast a glance to Lysandra.

"Vili is your littler sister?" He asked, scratching his head. Good cover I suppose.

Holly nodded. "She tried to get my father to arrange your marriage when he left, but she is still a child, even if she's obsessed with you."

"Holly, about your father." Ren started, taking her hand.

"I know, if he's not with you, I know." She made herself smile lightly.

"He saved me." Ren croaked. Then he knelt before her. "He shielded me with his life."

"Ren," Holly's throat bobbed. "My father frequently would say that the child were made to inherit the Earth. How could we do that if parents don't protect their children?" She smiled just a bit, "I am glad you are here."

When he didn't have a reply, Holly shepherded us towards the door, and into the manor.

She set to telling us what rooms were best. When Fenrys tried to justify sharing a room with Ren, Holly refused, saying that there were more rooms in the house than people, there was no reason to share unless they planned to enjoy each other's company in bed.

Fenrys blushed and ducked into his own room.

I was grateful for the bath. I was very grateful for Holly.

…

 **Holly:**

I had never felt so happy. And yet there was a pounding sadness within me.

My friends, my court had been tortured and enslaved and ruined by their trials. I had sat here, cursing the laundry and bleeding from chopping wood poorly. I had sat around and experimented with baking and never once going hungry.

They were supposed to be here with me. They weren't supposed to have suffered, but they did. Now all I could offer them was my cooking, and a warm place to sleep. When the other lords had been keeping Aelin from the throne, my father or I could have swayed the vote. I could have helped. There were a hundred ways I could have helped. Now I would. I would endeavor to be worthy of my friends and my queen.

Vaughan bathed quicker than anyone I had ever seen, well not that I watched him. He was down and in the kitchen with me in what felt like moments.

"Holly," his gravelly voice caused a shiver. I was baking the bread I had left rising overnight, and sautéing some vegetables from dinner. I had tossed all the fish into a dish and was baking it. The bliss of having two ovens.

There was little to do, but prod the vegetables along. Little to distract me from his wet hair slipping into his eyes.

He tipped my chin up. A long lingering kiss was laid onto my lips.

"I missed you." He breathed, lingering close enough each word tickled my lips. I pressed up on to my toes and kissed him back. I wrapped my arms around him and luxuriated in the realness of him. It had been too long since we had last been close.

"Excuse me, Lady Holly." I jumped back from Vaughan. No one had ever called me that. I turned to see Lady Lysandra with her arms crossed.

"Is there something wrong?" I asked.

She eyed the vegetables. "I wanted to chat." I brandished the wooden spoon, pointing to the bar seat. "You should know that Aedion and I are to be married upon our return to Orynth."

"Congratulations." I said evenly. This was clearly an attack, not in invitation.

"I think you should tell your sister before she does something foolish." Lysandra smiled, but I could swear it was more a bare of teeth.

"I think my sister is in love with my stories of Aedion. He is a very different person now, bigger for one. If you think your relationship is threatened by a child, then maybe you shouldn't be getting married."

"That wasn't my intent." Lysandra eased up. "I don't want her to be embarrassed."

"It doesn't matter what your intent is, my sister is not a fool. If you snip at her like you just did to me, she will bite back. I will not warn her to mindful of your feelings, she already knows how to conduct herself with civility." I lidded the pan. "Dinner will be done in twenty more minutes, perhaps you can let everyone know for me. I wouldn't want to make anyone think I was interested in my friends by speaking to them."

"Lysandra was a nice girl, up until now." Vaughan whispered to me after she had tramped out. "You should be nice."

"Did you ever think you would have to tell me to be nice?" I asked him as I leaned back into him.

I felt him smile even if I couldn't see it.

…

Dinner went well, they ate every bite then some. It seems that even though they were skilled hunters, they had trouble cooking it to an edible state.

"Where is your sister?" Fenrys asked after he polished off the bread.

"She's sleeping. She isn't the kindest when one wakes her, so I thought I would surprise her in the morning." I was leaning back my chair. If I didn't think these people would vanish as soon as I closed my eyes, then I would let myself sleep.

They told me of their adventures, good and bad. They shared their relationships, their new friendships, changes to court and Orynth. It was a lot, but any question I could think of, they answered in their narrative. Tears flowed freely, stopping and stalling stories. They jumped in on each other's stories, telling me everything. The companions I didn't know said little, but they seemed to understand that I would have been there, doing anything I could, had the circumstances been different. They talked until finally they asked after me.

I started at the beginning. "This plot of land was constructed, not merely purchased. The ground dug out and the land flattened. It was a huge secret because we were supposed to be here when everything happened. When Adarlan started making moves, our parents decided that as soon as this manor was done, we would move here and wait until we were old to do something about it."

They looked shocked. I looked to Ren, "your sisters were to bring you here. They were going to leave school the following week, collect you and head north." I looked at Elide who had tears shining on her face still. "Your Mother, was to take you, Aelin, and Aedion. But before she could gather you all, other things happened." I cast a glance around, looking for people I knew were not here. "Ravi and Sol?" I asked weakly.

"They are in Sidra, both fine." Aelin assured me with a pat.

"They were supposed to be here too. We were supposed to be together." I whipped the tears off. Gods, I could do nothing but cry today. "How about some cake?" I made to rise, but Vaughan beat me to it. Rushing off to get the cake.

"What else happened, where is your mother?" Aelin asked gently.

I cleared my throat and began again. "To buy the silence of the workers we gave them all a horse." Ren swore softly. HE knew how much those horses were worth, and how much we loved them. I paused, but continued. "Then they rode back over the mountain and onto Therlis. We decided to stay. To hide. My father was going to join everyone once the children arrived, but no one else ever did, so he never left. There is another reason that we decided to stay, every time there was whisper of a way we could help we debated it, but there was always that other reason so we stayed."

"After a time, my mother informed me that she was pregnant again. She was old when had Vili, but she carried the baby to term. We didn't want to inform people of where exactly we lived, but the birth was difficult and father rode into town and brought back a midwife.

"My brother's name is Uller, he's almost four, but my mother didn't survive. The woman vowed to keep our place secret, but like the men who worked on the manor, the secret didn't matter long, she was killed by some sickness. Pip, was her youngest son, his brother's joined the Bane and left him alone to care for their mother. The townsfolk knew, he knew where we lived, and were eager for more money. They forced him to show them where we were hiding, and none left alive. Pip resides here now, but others did not live long after finding this place." I glanced at Vaughan, who had just reappeared with the cake.

"Witches attacked the manor after, but they, also, didn't live long, then Vaughan felt something in blood oath and asked to leave. I was never his keeper, but he took the note to Elide." I finished, skipping so much detail.

"What is this other reason you stayed here?" Aelin asked, no nonsense.

I cast a glance to people I didn't know. I had kept this secret for long, could I really believe that they were trustworthy. If every word of my friend's tales were true, they were as trustworthy as I was.

"The land around the manor was leveled so a great iron vault could placed beneath us." I said the words slowly, chewing each one. Weighing how much it gave away.

"What is this vault for?" Aedion asked, equally measured.

I looked to each one of them, hoping that I was not about to make a mistake. "It contains all the wealth of Terrasen."

"Bullshit," Ren spit.

"It's dark still, and the doors are hard to open, I'll show you in the morning, but the vault has money from each of our houses." I pressed my shaking hands on the tabletop.

"How-how much?" Elide asked

"It divided into our houses if everything hasn't collapsed from their piles, but I alone have millions down there and Eldostrom house was not the richest." I pressed my hands flat to keep them from shaking.

"How could they have moved the all of that up here without anyone knowing, without me knowing?" Aelin asked disbelieving.

"Men used to be very loyal, and there is no one here to witness." I sighed. "The village I talked about is more than three days away."

"You've been protecting our wealth." Aelin asked with a chuckle. "They really did everything to protect us."

"It's a future, a future without struggle for Terrasen." Rowan whispered fervently.

"Kinda puts your mating gift a little lower on the gesture list, huh?" Fenrys elbowed Rowan, who in turn growled.

"It's not a gift. It was always theirs, we just kept it safe. I would have much rather had my friends here." I said in the low tone I used to correct Uller.

"Forgive Fenrys, he just hates surprises." Lorcan mussed.

"You must hate working for Aelin then." I muttered.

By the time we finished talking, the sun was coming up.

A door off the main sitting room, to which we moved after the cake was fully destroyed, opened revealing Pip.

"H-Holly?" He asked, tugging unknowingly at his shirt.

"There will be a few more horses to feed this morning." I called my spot between Elide and Vaughan.

"Y-y-yes, ma'm." He hurried out the door to complete his chores.

"He's a cute little thing." Elide whispered. I snorted lightly.

Shortly after Pip had woken, Uller followed his usual routine of waking me, only I wasn't in my room.

He was still a bit short to take the stairs as a normal person would and thus, slid down the stairs using the railing to help him.

Then at the bottom stopped. He could see all the people. All these strangers.

"Sissy!" He yelped.

I twisted around the back of the couch and called him over. He placed himself rigidly in my lap. His fingers gripped the hem of my blanket tightly.

"Uller, do you know who this is?" I asked and pointed to Elide.

He shook his head. Edile extended her hand to Uller, who took it.

"I'm Elide."

He had no words to offer in his terror of so many people however. "Do you know who that is?" I asked and pointed to Aelin who was sitting next to both Rowan and Aedion.

Uller's eye flicked from Aedion to Aelin. I could see the problem sousing out in his mind.

"The Queen!" he cried bursting my lap and over to her. "You're sissy's friend too!"

Promptly ignoring Rowan he clambered into Aedion's lap and to Aelin. Aedion kept a good grip on him though, worried he might be too rough without a warning about the baby growing. A round of introduction began. Uller traveling from lap to lap to meet each person. He was polite with everyone, but when he came around, he settled into Vaughan, drawing the blanket to his chin.


	17. Chapter 17: Fenrys' Marriage Consulting

**Chapter 17: Fenrys' Marriage Consulting**

 **Vaughan:**

Holly sidled off to bed soon after Uller went to help Pip. She told us that someone had to catch something for dinner, and disappeared upstairs. The other's followed her lead and went to take a nap before supper. I think she could tell that while her friends were excited to see her, they had been travelling hard to get here in a decent amount of time. They would not ask for an excuse to stop catching up.

I followed Holly's scent to her room. I was desperately looking forward to holding her again, to relaxing again.

But-

Holly's face was wet with tears, she had wrapped a great fur blanket over her shoulders, and curled onto the floor by the fire.

"Oh, Holly," I found myself saying before scooping her up and pulling her into my lap.

"Once I started crying, I just couldn't stop." She whipped at her face.

I kissed the top of her head. "It was all a lot."

Holly pushed the tears back to get out, "my father is dead, Orynth is a ruin, my friends suffered various forms of torture for years, but they are alive. They are alive and took time out of their lives and rebuilding for me."

I smoothed her hair. "The friendships you made when you were young are still strong."

"I wish I could give them more, be worthier of their loyalty, their love." She blubbered.

"You could not be more deserving. I know telling you what an amazing person you are, won't make you feel better. When you return to Orynth, help Aelin run the country, she is tired and she hates the lords. You have a way with people. Help her, help them all in ways that matter for the long term." I smiled at her.

She nodded. "I doubt Aelin had time to learn many of Terrasen's laws being an assassin."

"Do you have them memorized?" I asked playfully.

"Not word for word." She elbowed me.

I kissed her again, she tasted so sweet. I was never going to get tired of this.

"I was wondering." I said, breaking off our kiss. Holly sat up on her own. "Have you had time to consider, who you might want to spend the rest of your life with, now that you are free to choose?"

"You are the only person I have ever wanted to marry." She lowered her lashes, not quite meeting my gaze.

"Then I will bind my life to yours when we wed. As Elide and Lorcan did." I pulled her close again.

She shook her head, accepted the kiss but didn't reciprocate. "What if we have a child ,and I die in child birth? Will you leave them an orphan? There are a hundred other ways I could die, cutting your life even shorter."

She clearly didn't understand that it wasn't about the years. I retorted. "I have lived for six hundred and forty years, Holly, that's not short."

"It is by Fae standards." She shot back.

Tears pricked at my eyes. My soul felt bruised form her refusal. She had to understand. "It wouldn't matter if I lived only ten more minutes, if you are not in this world, I couldn't be either."

"Grief is a normal thing." She took my head in her hands.

"It would be far more than grief." I growled, and pulled away from her.

Holly stood and backed into her dressing room. Pulling her usual overalls out and stepping into them, urging the whole time. "I'm not arguing over this. I made my decision, I won't let you bind yourself to me. I have things to do though, I'm not arguing."

"Holly, please, let's talk about it." I reached for her, but the dressing room was a bit away, I didn't want to crowd her.

She blew a long breath. "I've said how I feel. You have disregarded it by telling me I don't understand. I have work to do, and many other emotions to work through. We can talk about this tonight." With that she marched out of the room, sweaters and overalls on, night gown and coat discarded on the ground. She slammed the door on her way out.

Before the door quit rattling, "are you sure this is about me binding my life to yours?" I called after her.

The door she slammed, opened again. "How dare you. How dare you think that I don't love you." She pointed her finger at me, tears pricking at her eyes.

Rage at her indignant anger seethed within me. "Well, you did just get your first crushes back, both of them."

"Aedion is engaged. I am engaged, to you." She raised her voice, the closest she ever came to yelling.

"And Ren?" I crossed my arms. This was jealousy plain, jealously.

"Oh, why don't you and Lysandra have a pity party together." She rolled her eyes.

"You got too comfortable, Holly." I said condescendingly.

I love Ren, I love Aedion, I love Elide, and Aelin. I have always loved them, they have always been my dearest friends. If you're going to have a problem with that, you should go see if Sellene needs a new bloodsworn." She spun out of the room, stomping down the stairs.

…

 **Holly:**

I had never felt so conflicted. Every emotion I could name coursed on high through me.

Was I the stupid one? Was he? I just wanted to scream and cry.

I hardly could do that in a house full of nobility, nor could I do that in house full of Fae.

I turned to the only the thing that centered me without question.

I dropped the sack on the counter and white powder went everywhere. I beat the eggs into the sugar until my hand cramped. Then worked my upper arm muscles by kneading dough. A lot of dough. Fenrys had ate an entire loaf himself. I now went through the steps over and over, making enough bread for dinner at the very least.

"Did the dough did something to you, or are you just always that aggressive?" Fenrys stood in the back door, a deer carcass over his shoulders. The throat torn out, by what looked like teeth.

"I have learned much today." I said evenly. Dropping a cloth over the dough to help it rise.

He laid the deer on the butchering block. Just outside of the kitchen door and called through it, "But none of it made you angry before."

"No," I said sardonically.

He drew the sharp knives at his side. "Who did you fight with, hum, Lysandra? Lorcan?"

"Vaughan." I answered evenly as possible.

"Trouble in paradise." He clicked his tongue chastising.

I offered him a rude smile.

"Vaughan never struck me as the one of us to marry, to be faithful to one partner, to stay in one place." He offered.

I again didn't respond. I didn't trust I would say what I meant.

"Yet he completely taken with you. He almost abandoned us a hundred times on the trail trying to get back to you sooner." Fenrys began the skinning of the deer.

"Likely he just wanted a warm bed." I shot back.

"Your bed?" he smirked.

I narrowed my eyes. "Don't fling that shit at me."

"So, if you haven't ensnared him with your prowess in the bedroom, he must really like you, or your sister, or your brother." He began the dissembling and I had turn away and lean against the other side of the door frame.

"He doesn't like my sister very much, but he does care for Uller." I amended my tone and my words.

"Not enough to act the way he does." He said almost singsong.

I huffed a breath. "We aren't fighting because I don't think he loves me."

"Oh, so you admit to fighting." He smirked.

"Don't be such a prick." I spit.

"You know, I thought you were timid little thing until now." He chuckled more to himself.

"You will drown that thought if I ever start riding competitively again." It was my turn to smirk.

"Oh?" He asked.

"I was very, very good." I traced lines in the grain of the frame.

"Good to know. Now back to the problem at hand." He thumped something down loudly. All serious.

I paused. Aelin trusted him, loved him. What the hell. "He wants to bind his life to mine when we marry, most likely sooner rather than later."

"And you don't want to marry him, or don't want him to bind his life to yours?" He asked calmly.

"He's Fae, he might live for a thousand more years. I won't be the end of that." I argued again.

"I think, my dear," He gestured to the meat before him in jest. "You have already been the end of him."

I blinked my confusion.

"He is choosing to avoid the detrimental pain of living without you, by going out with you, or you him." he explained slowly, as if I was stupid.

"I don't-" I started.

Fenrys held up a hand. "Would you ever force him to stay here. If he voiced the desire to leave, would you beg him to stay, make him stay?"

"Never." I said, confident for the first time.

"Then why would you make him stay in this world when he chooses to go into the next with you?" Fenrys asked.

"Death is-" I started again, but he intruppted.

"No one knows, so don't try to speculate. He wants to be with you, always. That is all." He washed his hands, leaving strips of meat for me to cook with. Leaving me in an even deeper turmoil than before.


	18. Chapter 18: So what's under this house?

**Chapter 18: So what is beneath this house exactly?**

 **Holly:**

After everyone began waking from their nap, questions about the vault made me finally break down my last barrier. I sighed heavily and swiped the cookbook off the counter. And gestured for them all to follow me.

I led them to the barn and handed out unlit torches, which Aelin was not fond of grabbing. She scoffed at them actually. We were going into the iron vault, no magic would penetrate it. Not even her endless wildfire.

"The stables, now." I motioned with a bob of my head towards them. I was nervous. I had lived my whole life waiting to open this thing, and now that it was here… I wasn't so sure. We filed from the barn in to the stables. I led us to the hay storage area. Usually on a lofted floor, this was secondary storage on the ground floor. Waiting to be brought up.

I tucked the cookbook onto a shelf, and gripped the bindings of the highest bale of hay.

Vaughan moved to take it from me, not willing to let me do a thing by myself. I pointed to the opposite corner. Telling them all to stack it against the wall. I moved out of the way, as they tried to overtly get me out of the line up, no one wanting me to do the work either. Aelin, Elide, and I watched as they made very quick work of the pile that was still mostly full from winter

When the floors were revealed, I told them to rip them up. They had built the stables right over the vault door. No one would guess. It seemed like an eternity was held before the full vault door was visible. It was set flat into the floor. Great spokes with no notion of up or down.

I plucked the cookbook up again. Lorcan and Vaughan stood on either side of the spokes, waiting to heave it open. I knelt at what my father had once pointed out as the bottom of the turn style.

I opened the book to one of the last pages. This cookbook was a family one, very old, and had only handwritten recipes. I cleared my throat and read. "When stirring marbled chocolates it's important to do it in a specific order to achieve the desired look. Stir clockwise until there is resistance."

Lorcan and Vaughan each took a spoke of the great iron wheel and pulled clock wise. The wheel didn't go, and their muscles bulged under the strain. A sharp screech of the gears, had them turning until a great clack stopped the motion.

"Then counter-clock wise 6/8th of a turn." I read again. I counted the iron spokes, 8. They turned it so, so slowly.

"I can help with that." Aedion took a step forward, but I held up a hand.

"You can save your strength for the next door, It's thicker." Vaughan gave me an exasperated look. I smiled for the first time since our fight. "3/8th to the right. 5/8ths to left."

There was an audible click of metal on metal. Lorcan and Vaughan began pulling the door up, trying to pry it open. Aedion and Rowan both stepped forward to help them. They braced the door open with an iron rod that unfolded from the inside of the door. The rod was thick, strong enough to hold open a door, but this was just the outer door and it was more than five inches thick.

I reached, again for a torch as an iron staircase appeared. It led straight down until I couldn't see. Aelin looked hesitant to head into another iron coffin. Even if this one was much larger.

"Someone has to stay outside, just in case the door closes, by accident." I said, looking right at Aelin. After what she had told me about what happened to her, well, I didn't think she would enjoy the sensation again.

"I'll take first, then." Aelin offered quickly. She lit everyone's torches before we descended into the iron cage.

The stairs led down thirty feet, maybe more. I wasn't totally sure.

The inner door, while larger than the first, was not as big as I remembered as a child. It was fifteen feet by fifteen feet. The spokes were more numerous, and longer, larger. It took all of them, Ren too, to get the door open.

The glow from the gold off of the fire was blinding and instant. I led the way into the cavern. It wasn't a cage or coffin, this was a whole iron cave. It was as large as the flat grounds above. Filled to the ceiling with gold.

"If you look on the floors, the chalk lines divide the wealth." I told them, lowering my torch. Lines ran around the room, dividing it. On one side of the line a name was written. Lochan. The towering stack was Elide's, Perranth's I walked around the parameter to my section of wealth. Huge, too huge. I had no clue how much was here. How would we even get it out of here. With this I could build a completely new city.

I hadn't realized that Elide had followed me, but she hugged me tightly, tears staining her cheeks. "Thank you."

I waited for them to be done, not that I really needed them to be anytime soon. I sat on the bottom step of the inner vault. The Allsbooks had not sent nearly as much as Elide's parents. But it was the crown, the royal treasury that was most impressive, even I didn't have as much as Aelin would after this.

I came from the smallest lordship though, but I knew that all of my wealth was here, even the money from our horse breeding. Vaughan didn't seem interested in perusing the mounds with everyone else. He instead came to sit with me. Waiting painfully awkward minutes to begin talking.

"You don't love me then?" He asked at last.

I blinked at him. How could he say that? "I don't understand why you binding your life to mine means I don't love you."

"It is my one desire, and you refuse it." He took my hands, needing to be closer to me. They were harder, colder somehow.

"Isn't your one desire to marry me, to love me?" I asked. It didn't matter though. I would have to give in this, Fenrys made a good point, I would never force him to be anywhere, and certainly not away from me.

"Is that your offer then, marry you and watch you grow old? Or not at all?" He growled.

I kept my voice even, without emotion. "It's not. I just want you to be sure before you do it."

"So, we are engaged." He murmured more to himself.

I supposed we were. "I have no ring." I twirled my fingers at him.

"I will send for it when we return to the capital." He informed me, also very emotionless.

"There is a trove here, pick a ring from in there." I said as gently as I could.

He shook his head. "No, no, I will send for my mother's ring. My wife will wear none other."

I nodded at that. It was a better excuse than I expected.


	19. Chapter 19: Vili's problem

**Hello all,**

 **I just wanted to share that struggled with chapter a lot. I wanted to write about siblings fighting, but their dynamic has changed significantly due to their situation. I also thought this would be good transition, a time for Holly to start to figure things out for herself. I rewrote this scene over and over and I'm still not totally pleased with it. I'd like to know what you all would do differently. I want to improve my writing and so I'd some thoughts on this problem. I think part of my problem is that I don't have Vili fully developed, so I have a hard time imagining what she would say or do, whereas what Holly does comes naturally to me now.**

 **Best,**

 **Fishy**

* * *

 **Chapter 19: Vili's Problem**

 **Holly:**

Vili had yet to leave her room since everyone arrived, at least until dinner. She often didn't bother to come down to eat. I brought her some food at lunch, but she commonly skipped meals in the morning, choosing to sleep in.

As much as her lack of help bothered Vaughan, I didn't mind. She helped when I asked, or if she noticed something wasn't done that should have been. She didn't neglect chores, she chose to other things with most of her time.

We had all sat around the table, I spent most of my weaning frustration on the various dishes, now laid out on the table.

"How do you know these people are who you say they are?" Vili asked me under her breathe.

I ignored her. I knew.

"How could the queen of our country, our very large country take time off to come all the way here?" She hissed again.

I ignored her again.

"Vaughan might be lying about bringing them form Orynth, we don't know him very well. Really we should wait for father to return before we open our home and vault to them." She whispered again. I knew they could hear her, likely even Ren and Lysandra could understand what she was saying.

"Vili, that's enough." I said in a low tone, trying to make my point clear.

Abandoning her whispering she protested further, "Father would have never sent them ahead."

I never told her. I had forgotten until she brought it up. I pressed my lips together and tried to order my thoughts. How could I tell her that he wasn't able to come? How could I tell her that he was dead and she could never see him again? How could tell her that she was an orphan? The words swirled and spun around my mind, but I didn't have enough of a grasp on them to say them out loud.

"What proof is there that she is who she says she is?" Vili argued when I still didn't open my mouth.

"Vili." I scolded, "You shouldn't need proof. There is no reason to doubt what I say, or what Vaughan says, and there is no reason to doubt her."

"I don't remember her. I'm starting to think you don't either." She said snappishly.

"Why would you say that?" I sighed.

"I don't want to be conned by him, and them!" She pointed to Vaughan and then around the table.

"We are hosting our queen, my friend, we aren't shelling out horses and coin." I set my utensils down. Before I berated her.

"You opened the vault for them. You opened it without father." Her voice broke. Enough in front of everyone. I pushed back my chair dramatically and waved for her to follow me. They would still be able to hear, but at least there would be some semblance of privacy.

I shut the door to the office we had fled to. "Father is not coming back here."

"I doubt that very much." She crossed her arms, readying for a fight.

"He's dead Vili." I clarified.

She dropped her arms, but balled her fists. "Did they tell you that? How could he have died, he wasn't even going to fight?"

I took a deep breath. "We weren't there, he made a decision to fight, and he died. A lot of people died."

"I don't believe you." She snorted.

I rolled my eyes. "It seems you don't believe things that disrupt your life."

I thought she would blow stream from her ears. "You believe everything, just for the hope of getting you back to your old life. Did you like it better when you could ride a different horse every day of the year and have hundred pairs of riding boots, when pranced around kissing all the noble boys? You can't believe everyone, Holly, you are never going to get back to that life." By the time her argument was finished she was full out yelling.

"And you are never going to get out of your miserable self-isolation if you don't try." I snapped back at her. "I am done with you not believing me, not trusting me. I have done everything I could to help you. If you don't believe they are who they say they are, then ask them. I am sick of you turning all of this negativity on me when I haven't done a thing. Throw it at someone else for a change." With that I left the room and went upstairs to cry.

It wasn't long before Uller came climbing up into the bed.

"I want to sleep with you tonight." He said, burrowing into the blankets.

"Of course." I said automatically. I didn't want to be alone either.

Uller laid between me and Vaughan all night. Separating us, but also keeping us warm. I couldn't sleep. I had run out of tears, but now I just watched my brother sleep, my fiancé sleep. I watched the ceiling.

I regretted fighting with Vili, but she was being stupid. It was probably unsighted anger from missing father, but it still rubbed me raw.

I knew I wasn't wrong, but she had no memory of life before. For her the before would be this, the after would be back in Orynth. Uller might not remember this place at all when he grew up.

My mother was buried here. My father was lost somewhere on a battlefield.

I was lady Eldostrom. I had to be both parents for my sister and brother. I had to be sister too. I had to help Aelin. I had a million things impossible tasks. Of all the problems I thought I would face, this was not one of them.

In the morning I would apologize to everyone, Vili included.

Then I would pack my things, set Pip up to take of everything.

Sunny should be able to make it without too much trouble.

This would work. I would make a plan for each problem and I would conquer each one as I needed to. Vaughan said I could do anything that needed to be done, moving back to Orynth would be the first.


	20. Chapter 20: Conversations from the trail

Hello all,

This is a short chapter, so I posted two today! Enjoy!

-Fishy

* * *

 **Chapter 20: Important conversations from the trail**

 **Holly:**

I made rule with myself when I began packing. I would only pack what was here that I couldn't get better in Orynth, and what was here that I would miss dearly. I made the rule strictest for myself, Uller had it easiest, but he had a fraction of the things I did.

Vili wanted to bring all of her clothes, but I convinced her that bringing more money would be in her favor. She was making dresses with ten year old patterns.

She relented and packed warm clothes.

I brought the cookbook and some clothes. We hadn't been able to bring many sentiment things from our old house as we had to make the fire look real.

I was eager to return and rebuild it.

I was eager to see Orynth again.

…

Uller shouldn't have been riding Shiny just yet, but I grew antsy and itchy when he rode with me. I needed the space, I needed to feel the saddle.

Vaughan still spent most of the day flying ahead. Scouting.

Elide and I gossiped more than we should have, Lysandra joined us more than Aelin did. Fenrys had more to say than Elide.

They took turns answering my questions about the various things that had happened, and where others were. Most queries ended with death or destruction.

After the first day of ceaseless talking, Aelin seemed to kick into gear again. Realizing that she was going back to paperwork and pardons.

She asked me to ride with her, at the front, out of ear shot of the others. She then proceeded to explain problem after problem, asking me what I would do and how to fix it. It was such a sudden switch from her carefree attitude only two days ago, that I wasn't sure what to say at first. After we grew into a rhythm, I would ask more clarifying questions and she would provide me with details that I would use to advise her on action.

I had been right about her not being able to study, and I was glad I could offer her this.

Depending on the topics, everyone or more people chimed in. Often Aelin had to ask Aedion about something. He had been acting as Hand of the Queen lately.

…

A week from Orynth, Aelin pulled me aside to ask me an important question.

"Holly there is much I lack when it comes to being a good queen." She started.

I shook my head. Aelin loved her people, her country very much, and wanted to do right by them. There wasn't much else needed.

"I need someone by my side that knows Terrasen, and knows me. I need someone unafraid of checking me, of reminding me of reality. I need someone to help me with the things I don't know or don't think of." She kept going, growing in fervor

"I will always help you to the best of my ability." I answered calmly.

"I want you and Aedion to split the duties of Hand of the Queen. He will handle the armies and security, you handle the diplomatic and law side of things." She explained.

"I don't know that I'm qualified for that." I said nervously.

"If you're not qualified for that, then I'm not qualified to be queen." She joked.

I let out a nervous laugh.

"Will you do it?" She asked, twisting the reins in her hands.

"Of course," I wrapped my arms around her as best as I could in the saddle.

When Aelin told everyone they all set to offer congratulations.

Vaughan had nothing to say until we were alone. He asked how this would impact our relationship, how much of my time would be spent in meetings. I had no real answers for him, but 'a lot'.


	21. Chapter 21: Orynth

**Chapter 21: Orynth**

 **Holly:**

There was a long road cutting a path over the fields before Orynth. It seemed like it would take us forever to finally reach it.

Once it first came into sight, even Racer couldn't be still. I wanted to hurry on ahead, I wanted to see it. The good, the bad, the memories and the new buildings.

There was only one thing keeping me from seeing if Racer could own up to his name still. He was getting to be on the older side. Uller and Vili would not race. Aelin, well she couldn't.

Vaughan would stay with Uller and VIli. I could race ahead, but I knew Aelin would want to be there when I first returned.

I knew the others noticed how antsy I was getting. They laughed every time I wheeled Racer around to the back of the line. He kept fighting his way forward.

"You know, Holly," Aelin called from her Asterion mount. "I think I have one last good race in me before I'm too big to do so."

"No cheating this time." I said and pushed Racer to line up with Aelin. She snorted her response, but stilled her horse.

"Ladies, please, no one wants you to do this." Vaughan started. "Tell them Rowan."

"I think you will find Terrasen ladies don't listen very well, they all take after their queen." Rowan stilled his horse as well, giving Vaughan a concerned look.

"On my mark then," Ren said, lifting an arm.

"Only if you count at a measured rate." I jested, remembering how he would always cheat and count too fast to process.

I clicked to Racer who tensed beneath me. I pushed up in the saddle, riding to create the least amount of drag and snag for Racer.

"One," Ren cheered. "Two." Uller screamed along. "Three!"

Aelin and I burst forward. I didn't look at her, only the road. It had been well repaired, no holes to break my horse's leg on.

Racer was eager to prove he still had it in him. Aelin's horse didn't feel the fear or passion to run. I could tell, the horse had been trained too much, it lost the joy of running when it was told to do so.

Racer could not outpace him however, they rode side by side through the gates that were opened and cleared through for the returning queen. Rowan must have flown ahead to tell them.

We went slower, considerably, once we were through the city gates, taking our time and letting the others catch up. I was drooling at the shops. Gods, how I had missed having nice underwear. I wanted to cry at the sweet shops, at the tack shops, at all of them. I would be spending all the money I brought down form the manor, which was a lot. Vili was likely just as excited and savvy. I would have to do what father had done with me, give her a monthly allowance to save and spend correctly.

All management skills were built on small responsibilities.

Aelin was called out to, people approached her to kiss her hands, to thank her. The war had touched these people in far, far worse ways than it had me. I could never forget that.

"You're revered" I commented when the lull of people dissipated fully.

"I came marching in to save everyone with an army. It was quite the entrance. You would have been proud." She smirked.

"I am proud." I said automatically. "And I am sorry I didn't help more."

"I would have never wanted you there in the first place." She told me. "If I would have died, and your father lived, they would have tried to put him and then you on the throne."

"The Eldostrom's are not in line for the throne, I never would have agreed-" I started, angrily.

"You would make a good queen, and I would have been dead. Someone has to rule Terrasen who has a good heart and mind." Aelin intruppted sweetly.

"I don't want to be queen." I sighed.

"Neither do I, but here we are." Aelin grumbled.

I drew her attention. "I will help you, help Terrasen. Fortunately, or not, I have a clean background that the other lords will respect. I have studied the laws and histories far more than one should. I can help you, and I will." I vowed.

Aelin had pointed out the library and the theatre that Rowan was having built for their mating present. I was extremely jealous, but I knew she would let anyone inside, so I wasn't too jealous. During the ride she told me about the more problematic rebuilding issues she was facing. I didn't give her my ideas, and solutions just yet, what she told me was surface level, and I needed more info before I started touting my opinion.

"Then everything will be as it should have been." She smiled.

"Better." I challenged.

"A better world." She echoed.

The others caught up to us quite soon. Vaughan set to berating me and my dangerous actions. Aelin thankfully just raised an eyebrow and gave her horse to a groom. I was loath to give over my horses, but I knew they would take good care of them. I would also likely be down here more often than not.

I was not interested in waiting for everyone to unload, and for the first time in a while I didn't have watch or even do it myself. There were well-paid servants who would set up my living quarters and bring my things. I would have to find a suitable nanny for Uller, I would be in council meetings and planning all day, I wouldn't be relaxing.

All that manual labor for a decade, and now the real work began.

I wanted to see the faces of the lords who had hid while my father fought. I wanted to introduce VIli and Uller. I wanted sit in the grand dining hall and have a family dinner. I wanted, above all else, to begin my life as it should be.

There was so much I wanted to do. I knew Aelin dreaded the meetings and the politics of it all, but I had been waiting for this for a decade, I had been learning and reading so that I might do this well. I had to prove to her and the court that I was a valuable person in this, and I had to prove to myself that I could find the solution to any problem. I had prove to my father that he didn't have to fret about leaving us here.

We would build a better world.


	22. Chapter 22: Lysandra Aedion's Wedding

**Chapter 22: Lysandra and Aedion's Wedding**

 **Holly:**

By spring time there was so much buzz about a royal wedding. A wedding that I was partaking in. Aedion and Lysandra had many people acting as their ladies and men, and I was one of them.

Lysandra commissioned us dresses, claiming to throw out the usual matching scheme and urging us to pick whatever dress style we wanted as long as they matched in color and fabric. Which, since they were all made by the same people, were matching.

Aedion didn't ask Vaughan to be one of his men, which was a bit of a sore subject with him. I tried my best to assure him that he needed to take care of Uller instead. Vaughan agreed, but said I had to save many, many dances for him.

I took notes on her wedding, wanting to take the elements I liked and create something even grander when the time came. If it ever came. Vaughan had apparently sent for his family's rings, but his mother refused to send them without meeting me. Which was fine, really, I would have loved to meet his family. The issue was she was so busy with something, that she couldn't come for another year.

I knew it was important to Vaughan, so I didn't push it, or ask for him to consider prodding his mother along or find different rings. We lived almost like we were already married. We slept in the same bed, sat together always, the servants referred to him as Lord Eldostrom. I was hesitant to take that one last step, though. I didn't know what tiny part of me wasn't ready, but I hoped that it would be quelled once we were married. Vaughan hadn't pushed having sex, much. Sometimes when we got to kissing, he had to leave the palace altogether to avoid acting on his desires. It made me feel terrible, but I knew, not waiting until I was ready, would feel worse.

On the day before the wedding, Uller turned four. We all threw him a little party. We had dinner and my friends showered him with gifts. Aelin and Rowan got him a very large set of outdoor games, fit for him to grow into. Aedion and Lysandra got him a set of books about horses, and Elide and Lorcan got him the largest bag of candy and sweets I had ever seen.

It was his best birthday ever, I was grateful for them all. I was also excited for Vili's birthday to come around so I she could feel just as loved. She had been spending time with people her own age, which was as good for her as it was for me. She also had quite the repertoire of boys following her around.

The wedding preparations in the morning took all day. To be fair we spent most of it drinking, letting the servants do our hair and makeup. It was odd because we were supposed to stay separately from the males. Only Lysandra and Aedion followed that rule, and Rowan, Lorcan, and Vaughan kept coming into the room we were using to get ready, to steal champagne and kisses. My scalp was sore by the time the lady doing my hair was finished. I had forgotten how painful elegant hair was.

The throne room, where the ceremony would happen, was covered in flowers. Even in the ballroom, flowers were placed in every nook and hung from the ceiling in strings. Lysandra's dress even had a few live flowers sewn into the collar. Everything was gorgeous. Aelin wanted everything to be prefect for Lysandra. I agreed, this was her first big event as a lady, and it was supposed to be the best of her life. I would want it to be fun and pretty as well, maybe not perfect.

The ceremony was long, but heartfelt. The story of how Aedion and Lysandra came together was important to them, and they shared it with everyone in attendance. I hadn't known Lysandra long, but I knew that there was so much love for Aedion in her heart. They truly adored each other, that had been obvious on the road. After the initial bout with her, she was so kind and sweet, she was wonderful to Uller and Vili even. She made me feel welcome, back into my family that had evolved.

The flowers that I held were heavier than I could have ever thought. I was ecstatic when the dancing and eating began, it gave me plenty of excuses to not hold the flowers.

There was a dance that all the Terrasen lords and ladies were supposed to know. I had taught it, poorly to Vili. I knew it myself, but I hadn't taught Vaughan. For this, he was left out. When the final dance before Lysandra and Aedion left on their honeymoon began, I told Vaughan I had to go find Ren, as he was my assigned dance partner.

"Why can't you dance with me?" He huffed.

I shook my head, confused why he was insisting. I had just said why, "You don't know the dance, it's really complicated, only Terrasen nobility know it. Only a few people here even know it." I said again.

Lysandra had invited many people, and the court, but likely the court didn't know the dance well anymore. They would have only danced it at Elide's wedding, and Aelin's coronation.

There hadn't been many opportunities.

"I promise I'll teach you before our wedding." I tipped on my tippy toes and kissed him. He didn't seem pleased.

Ren bumped right into me, also looking for his dance partner.

"Lovely Holly, let's get to dancing." He said taking my hand. I glanced back at Vaughan, who was already gone.

The dance began with ten couples around Lysandra and Aedion. After each round of the song, partners were traded in a joining hands and twisting sort of move. I would start with Ren, but end four people over.

Which would be Fenrys, I think. Only the middle couple didn't change, which, unless it was a wedding, would always be Aelin and Rowan.

The dance led us around the middle, drawing closer and further apart. It was a dance meant to be watched from the second level of the throne room. Which was why only Terrasen people knew the dance, no other ballroom or throne room had a second level, at least as far we knew. The dance looked dizzying from the floor, and not at all fun. It also was a heavy dance, you were supposed to work up a sweat doing it, it was practically running around the dance floor with someone else in uniform patterns.

It was fun for the girls because we were dropped and caught, and twisted about, but it was an intense workout for the men—males. They all had to be perfect or they would drop someone in the partner trading. For them it was a way to show off.

When the dance started, while I remembered the direction, I was off for the steps. Ren had to keep me from tripping several times. It made me laugh at my own clumsiness too much. By the next rotation, with one of the older lords, I was much better, and by the time I made it to Fenrys I was helping him with the steps more than the other way around. Either way we were most certainly the messiest pair on the floor, and it led to another giggle fest, ending with Elide on the ground, after Fenrys failed to catch her when she was handed off.

Vaughan was no where to be found, neither was Uller, so I figured that they had gone up to bed.

I didn't really want to join them just yet. So, it was almost morning when I collapsed on the empty bed, still in my dress.


	23. Chapter 23: Rumors

**Early Fall:**

 **Chapter 23: Rumors**

 **Holly:**

With Aelin's due date drawing closer, King Dorian, his hand, and his hand's wife were on the way to Orynth.

According to Aelin, I would love all of them. According to Elide, I was missing out on such a great friendship with Yrene. I was eager to meet them, if only to put a face to all the amazing and terrible stories behind their names.

Aelin's due date also meant that Yulemas was coming fast. I knew that once Aelin had the baby, she would stop doing any work at all. Which would leave me with even less personal time, to do things like shop for family.

I took the shops in the city. Elide had tried to tag along, but I knew what I wanted to get her, and so urged her to do something productive instead of shop with me. She had laughed at me, but understood I didn't want her coming on this trip.

I ducked in and out of the shops quickly, since the rain was coming down harder than I ever expected from the clear morning it had been. I was thankful I had brought my cloak that had been treated with water repellant. My shopping bags were getting soggy, and it was time to find a carriage to take me back to the castle.

…

 **Dorian:**

The water coming down the sky was almost as thick as the river below the ship. Aelin loved this country, but every time I came, the elements seemed determined to throw me out.

I was desperate to get to the castle, news about the whereabouts of the rouge witches had come from soldiers in the Fangs. I needed to get to the Fae males, so they could deal with it. I agreed with Chaol that going alone was not an option. Going with Manon or asking her to send troops was no longer an option either.

She had dumped me. She explained that being queen of three people would be too difficult, as she couldn't even unite the two peoples she was queen of at the moment. She didn't have time to fly across the country often enough, and she didn't want me to wait, and she didn't want to wait either. I had a feeling my mother had made some stern comments as well. My mother who had fled at the first sight of danger, had thrown rude comments at the most deadly creature in this world.

There wasn't enough time in the day to get all of my work done, I knew she would feel the strains of duty even more. Everything made sense, it just sucked.

Choal and Yrene had pushed everything out of their schedules so we could go to Terrasen a week early, so I wouldn't mope about the castle any longer. At least that's what Yrene had called it.

After the ship docked, we hurried up to the castle, fighting the rain. Aelin was waiting just inside the doors, not even in the throne room.

She launched at me, and wrapped me in the most awkward hug I had ever been in.

"I'm glad you came early!" She whispered trimly.

"Me too." I got out between squeezes.

The others appeared from their various places in the castle to greet us. All making sweet comments and telling us what we missed from Aelin's cravings or Fenrys' pranks. They took turns holding baby Nehemia, and cooing at the three month old.

"Holly should be back soon." Lysandra said when she finally passed the baby to Elide.

"As if rain will stop her from having all of her shopping done." Aedion smirked.

"I think we should wait here, until she gets back." Aelin smiled deviously. Likely to pry the bags form this poor girl and see what was inside.

They were being oddly obvious about their eagerness for Holly, Aelin's hand, to return. I expected nothing but a terrible setup.

Rowan pulled Aelin back towards him. "She likely thought of that already."

"I'll just have to go searching through all of her things." Aelin said simply.

"She definitely thought of that already." Fenrys added confidently.

Just as they were about to start listing all the places they would look for Yulesmas presents the great doors opened and a red cloaked figure hurried into the hall. She carried no shopping bags though.

"I knew it." She said as crossed to us dripping the whole way. "Don't bother to bribe my servants Aelin, I didn't get you anything."

"But you will." Aelin crossed her arms.

Holly untied her cloak, and someone automatically stepped forward to take it from her. she looked a little shocked when the page grabbed it, but recovered quickly. Instantly challenging Aelin, "and you will never find it."

"Doubtful." Aelin gave the girl such a warm smile. I hadn't expected Lady Eldostrom to be so young, or so like Aelin. Human Aelin and this girl could be sisters.

"Where is Vaughan?" She asked after surveying the whole group.

Various counts of 'I don't know' went up around them. Who was Vaughan was my question? They might have planned to set me up with this girl, but I already couldn't complain.

"This is Dorian." Aelin said suddenly, as if forgetting that I had never met her. She shook my hand lightly. "And Yrene and Choal." Holly shook their hands as well.

Holly sighed, "I have the veteran's bill to finish before the last meeting tomorrow, but then I'll join you all for supper."

"I'll help." Aedion offered.

…

 **Holly:**

Aedion and I sequester ourselves in my office. Reading and changing the last bits of the bill before the announcement tomorrow. It was the last changes we would make to the funding of the soldiers either in the Bane or other. The Bane had no war to fight and had been leading the construction effort everywhere. Now that winter was close, we couldn't do as much construction, and we certainly didn't have the money to pay them for work that wasn't getting done. We came up with a different bill, to fund the soldiers barest living expenses through winter, and to fund living expenses for those unable to find other work due to injuries in the war. It was a long time coming, but we got there before winter, which was our goal.

Tomorrow we would pass it, then ride out to the living quarters we had built for the Bane who were working construction, or unable to afford something for themselves, and announce it. There would be a party and it would be Aelin's last public appearance before the baby.

There was a knock on my door, and one of mail runners brought me my accounts from spending today.

While Aedion flipped through the document one more time, I approved the payments.

"This isn't right." I said. I looked at Aedion not even realizing it was in shame. The price, there was no way I spent that much. Almost five figures worth.

"Hmm." He asked absently.

The bill had come from a place a didn't recognize either. The bill was addressed to Lord Eldostrom, so Vaughan must have spent it, but where and what on. It just said services rendered under the itemized list. It had been accruing for nearly a month, starting the day we arrived here.

"Do you recognize this place?" I handed Aedion the bill.

"Woah," he said immediately.

"I know. What is it though?" I asked again.

"A brothel." He answered and folded the paper back up.

"What?" I asked stunned.

"They are expensive." He said tentatively, before he handed the paper back to me. I could tell something was stirring in his mind.

Not even a moment after I had folded all the documents away, he rose. He looked ready to shout what he must had pieced form the paper. I was more concerned with Aedion telling everyone, than my own feelings. Vili had told me the rumors and my insides felt gutted then. Now I was just numb. The king of Adarlan was here, and Aelin was about to have a baby. Now was not the time to start a huge fight or even suggest I was upset.

"He doesn't love you the way he should." Aedion said deadly serious.

"I will deal with it after things get back to normal. And I will deal with it with Vaughan." I said folding the paper up and shoving deep in my desk.

Aedion stood and knelt before me, growling before he could the words out. "There is never going to be a normal again. Is that why you let him tell you what to do, what to wear? You can't be alone with Ren or Fenrys, Holly. He is jealous and he is stifling you. If you think things will ever go back to how they were when you two were alone in the wilds, you are deluding yourself. Let me throw him out. Let me send him on his way for you." He was kneeling before me now, tears in his eyes. "If you don't give me permission, I will send him away the next time he breathes wrong. I will never forgive him for betraying you."

I had never thought they noticed. I had thought they all were accepting of Vaughan. The most I had heard was Fenrys' comments about him never believing Vaughan would settle down.

I whipped at the lone tear on my cheek. "Aedion, Vaughan and I haven't been intimate. He likely goes to the brothels to service himself."

"Unacceptable." Aedion snapped. "I never touched other women after I met Lysandra, it was a year before we even kissed. If he loved you, he would wait a century for you. It was same for Rowan and Lorcan."

"It's my choice not to have sex, Aedion. He shouldn't have to suffer—" I started in a lecturing tone.

He interrupted with a growl, then launched back at me. "You know better than that. You know that if he really loved you, he would never even think about someone else. If he was your mate,-"

"He's not my mate. Not everyone gets a prefect relationship." Jealousy and heartbreak and truth all thrown into those two sentences.

He softened significantly, "then don't settle for the first one. Ren would be infinitely better than Vaughan."

"I don't want to marry someone I'm told to." I shot back. Tears were streaming down my face now and I couldn't get them to stop. "I want to marry someone who loves me and who I love." My words were weaker than I wanted. He knew the truth then. I might love Vaughan, and he might love me, but there were little things getting in the cracks every day, forcing us further and further from that bliss of my mountain manor.

"I'm sending him away." Aedion said and stomped out of my office.

I took off after him, screaming for him to stop.

…

 **Dorian:**

Normally, they ate dinner in a great hall with servants, lords, and visiting people. Since this was a family dinner, we ate in a smaller dining room. Lots of the chairs were still empty, one for Holly, Aedion, and three more. I wanted to sit near this new addition to Aelin's inner circle. For political reasons, of course.

Before we even got drinks poured, I knew something was happening because all the Fae in the room went still, trying to listen. It was almost a full minute before I could someone yelling after Aedion.

The flew open and Aedion stomped in. He looked around the room and right when he opened his mouth Holly swung around the corner into the room and practically slammed in Aedion. She slapped her hand over his mouth.

"Stop making trouble." She shouted at him.

He glared at her. She leveled a look at him that could have set Aelin on fire.

"Fine." He said at last. And plopped down in a chair hard enough to make it groan.

Holly pushed her long hair behind her back and took a seat as well. She was wearing overalls, and from the front pocket on them she pulled speech cards out and handed them to Aelin.

"You might want to add something about international relations if your friends will be there tomorrow." She said with a bit of a pant.

Aelin eyed the cards, the state of them at least, I had never seen more crumbled cards.

"So lazy that you don't even write your own speeches anymore?" Choal asked with a grin and an attempt to ease the desire for answers.

"I would never write a speech ahead of time, and Holly is much more eloquent than I could be making something up." Aelin smiled and began serving herself.

"Where has Vaughan been all day?" Lysandra asked no one in particular.

"I sent him to check the location where the witches were last spotted." Aelin answered. "I don't expect he'll be back for a bit yet."

"And Uller and Vili?" Elide asked Holly.

"At some party for one of Uller's classmates." Holly answered.

"Why didn't we go to that?" Fenrys asked.

"Because the queen and company showing up to a servants house is overwhelming. Vili said even I couldn't go." Holly smiled sadly.

"You've become a tyrant if the servants are afraid of you." Elide joked.

Holly picked up a roll and chucked it at her. Lorcan caught it before it could hit Elide, and bit into it.

A round of laughter filled the room. I had missed having this vibrancy in my life. Chaol and Yrene were sleep deprived at best. Hollin and Terrin had moved into the castle and filled my days with more problems than joy.


	24. Chapter 24: Building a Future

**Chapter 24: Building a Future**

 **Aedion:**

Holly was late. No one really wanted to get started, and not waiting for the Hand, when the Queen wasn't to be in attendance seemed wrong. Ten more minutes though and a slew of terrible things would be said about Holly. Everyone had read our draft of veteran's bill before the meeting today, and Aelin had already signed it, just so she didn't have to attend. There was really nothing to debate, it was already a law. Maybe that was why Holly had neglected to attend.

Ren seemed like he was about ready to go looking for her. She likely was in her office or her rooms. Though there was a chance she had gone out on one of her horses and lost track of time.

This was only a small council, Lysandra wanted to attend, and no one dared say she couldn't, but her presence wasn't necessary, and her voice wouldn't be heard if there was a vote.

Lord Sloane was leaning on the window eaves looking out at the courtyard, muttering something only I could hear about women. My temper was growing increasingly more pressed.

The guards in the hallway threw the door open and Holly shuffled her way in. "Thank you all for waiting for me." She smiled, but it was strained under the weight of the books she had brought.

"What's this?" I asked.

"Population records. The issue we face today, is feeding everyone tomorrow." She quipped.

"I don't understand. We are talking about the veteran's bill." Ren drawled.

"Yes, well. Summer is over. We can rebuild farms, transport fertile soil where we need it, but nothing will be growing in it until spring comes back." Holly explained. "We have produced only a tenth what we have in past. Our population is estimated to be at half what it was ten years ago, but those numbers still don't match."

"You bring a large problem to for us to face." Lord Darrow folded his hands in front of him. doing his best to remain unfazed, and imperious. "What are your suggestions?"

"I believe I'm supposed to ask that of you." Holly said a bit too snappishly to be called polite. Darrow had used every opportunity to intercede her authority. He didn't feel as though she was old enough, smart enough, or connected enough to be Hand. Though there was not issue that she had failed to fix or present numerous suggestions and solutions to.

"I think we should start buying food." Lord Darrow answered.

Holly nodded. "King Dorian has informed me that there is to be a treaty between all the countries that fought in this war. I suggested to him to include a discounted rate for needed items. I suggest we use our ties to countries less effected by the war to alleviate what will be a famine throughout winter."

"Our people will starve without food." Ren started, but Darrow intruppted what was likely the rest of his thought. "And we don't have the money to buy enough food."

"Ardarlan was only destroyed in two places, but their population was decimated. Someone should have sent our farmers to his land to help alleviate this food strain before it began." She looked to everyone, disappointment clear. "Now it will cost everyone."

"Aelin won't let anyone go hungry." I said to sooth things.

"She has no control over merchants taking advantage of food scarcity and subsequent rising prices. Even if we pass a law today about it, it will happen in places that we can't enforce." Holly grew in passion, making it clear we were out of options.

"So, we pass the law and do our best." I offered.

"Not hiking food prices through winter, for one year only, to be revisited next fall." Lord Darrow said penning it.

Holly nodded to this as well. "It will cost the crown, but not the people. We pay the extra imports and pay for the difference in what a merchant would usually pay in buying from Terrasen farmers. We have to look into those values though, without the farmers knowing why, so they can't change the numbers on us."

"Yes, and we will have to reach out to our allies for food."

Holly cleared her throat. "I've already done that. It takes a month to get letters to Wendyln and longer to the southern continent. We don't have two more months without rationing the whole city."

"So, they will send food without negotiating a price?" Sloane grumbled.

"We are still recovering from war, I'm sure we find a way to pay for it." She said polite as can be.

"Yet you didn't fight in it, my dear." Lord Sloane smirked.

"Did you?" She asked too sweet.

"I am too old to fight, surely you understand." He showed his teeth in his fake smile.

"My father was older than you, and died. Ren's grandfather was older than you, and had a similar fate. I think that your unwillingness had less to do with your age and more about self preservation. If you continue to value yourself, your wealth, and your name more than your country, there will be no people in your territory left alive to make that money for you that you so love. Be grateful for the braver men and women in this world, lord Darrow. I would hate for you to be best there is."

Holly snapped the book shut.

"Aedion send out some of your officers to get the values I requested. They will meet with me to gain better instructions of what I want." She ordered. "Lord Darrow, pen the law and present it to Aelin as soon as possible."

She tapped her fingers on the table thinking a moment before her orders were complete. "Ren have your friend, Nox Owen, prepare to ride with the declarations of the law everywhere we can reach. I don't want people starving because they live too far out for us to police. Also have them start watching their food intake. I don't mean to scare with them with rationing, but limiting themselves a bit won't hurt."

"Yes, ma'am." We all answered.

"And what is my job, my lady?" Lord Sloane asked.

"I have been here for months, so seeing as though that is the first time you have called me by title, not some sick endearment, I have no reason to trust you. If you want more responsibility you have to show me that you will work for Terrasen's future, not your own betterment." Holly said simply. She heaved a reassuring breath. "Are there any other questions?" She looked everyone in the eyes, making sure there was no doubt in them at all.

When she made it around the table, she dismissed us. Meetings had gotten significantly shorter with Holly in charge. It was a good thing, but I knew that she was doing the research and work to make up for the time not spent debating. Of course, we had a healthy debate when the answer wasn't as clear as today. Even Aelin wasn't confident enough to end a meeting in ten minutes. She wanted to hear what every person had to say, whatever eventuality could be. Which was good, but wasted time that needed to be saved for more important issues.

Aelin had never interrupted Holly, or controlled meetings when she was there. She trusted Holly more that the advisers, and often Holly would stop their argument and summarize it in a sentence, ask if their argument was well summarized, and would move along. She didn't let others argue the same exact thing, and had no slack for what people felt like. She wanted facts, she wanted logical predictions, not opinions.

I was impressed, to say the least.


	25. Chapter 25: Aelin's Labor

**Mid- Autumn**

 **Chapter 25: Aelin's Labor**

 **Holly:**

Lorcan, Fenrys, and Vaughan returned from the mountains covered in blood. Blue blood.

The witches who had defected after the war were dead, not one witch escaped. The same couldn't be said of the Wyverns, but they wouldn't be as destructive without direction.

Everyone had mixed feelings about this final remnant of the war finally, finally being done with. It was good for morale, but I wasn't sure we had seen the very last of the Valg. The celebrations were just between our little group, and short. As soon as the males returned and gave their report to Aelin, she when into full labor.

She had been contracting lightly for a few days, but as if this one last thing was enough to reassure her enough that the world was safe for her little one.

The whole castle was thrown into a dizzying whorl. We sequestered ourselves in Aelin's suite, which was massive. Aelin lay wherever she felt most comfortable, and Yrene and I took turns sleeping. Aelin was clear that someone she knew, and knew well, would be the one to deliver this baby. I had helped with more foals than I could count, but Fae births were complicated. I didn't mind being the one to keep an eye on Aelin so Yrene could sleep, though.

Food was delivered ever other hour, so much that even with so many people we could barely eat it all. Window washers found excuses to be cleaning the queen's windows three days in a row. Everyone wanted to know about the child before it was officially announced.

When I wasn't keeping a stern eye on Aelin or sleeping, I was thinking about the announcement party, or I was thinking about what I had learned about Vaughan. I had confronted him about the bill, and he had explained his actions as a need. When I didn't satisfy him, he needed to find it other places. It wasn't ideal, but I supposed that relationships between immortals and mortals rarely were.

Lorcan and Elide were mates. Aedion and Lysandra were mates. Rowan and Aelin were mates. Vaughan and I weren't. He also made that fact very clear. We were never going to have a perfect relationship.

As many times as I told myself that, well, I had neglected to give Vaughan any affection in recent days. I blamed it on our proximity to the others, we all slept in the large sitting room. Being intimate wasn't an option at the moment. I blamed it on exhaustion. I blamed it on stress. He kept pushing, and knew once this baby came, I would run out of excuses of not wanting to take that last step.

Maybe if I did it, he would stop going to the brothel.

I must have zoned out completely, because Aelin was asking something for the fourth time.

"Holly," Aelin said again, sharp enough to pierce my thoughts. I adjusted myself back into the real world with a shake of my head. "I need to tell you something."

"Hmmm," I mused.

"In my will," She started with a shaky breath.

"I've read your will. You made me. Remember." I countered.

"I guess I have a fear of unfinished business." She smiled just a touch.

"Well, you will happy to know that I will remain Hand as long as I am allowed. And I will never give up serving Terrasen, even it takes me to an early grave." I drummed my fingers on the table top. "Want to play cards."

"I'll cheat," she said bluntly.

"I'll still win." I challenged.

"How can you win if I cheat?" she raised a brow, but moved across from me.

"I guess you'll have to find out." I smirked and began shuffling.

After the first round, Aelin was howling with anger. She was pissed that I had still been able to beat her. From her noises it was unlikely you could tell whether it was the labor pain or the pain of losing.

Others came in to see what the fuss is. Most joined us in playing, some still watched.

Vaughan was no where to be seen, but I figured he was working on how to pay for his charges at the brothel, as I refused to pay them. That or he was avoiding Aedion, which was understandable. Aedion was not forgiving about the issue, but I had least kept him from sharing my business with the others.

…

 **Vaughan:**

Holly was desperately sad. I needed to do something to show her that we were still in love. That I was who she was meant to be with. It wasn't like she had any other options. She was terribly busy all of the time, and while it had been grating on me, once she committed to me again, everything would be fixed and back to normal.

Back to how life was in the manor. We should summer there, just us, alone. That sounded like the best thing for us.

Holly and the others were sitting playing cards, and laughing there, she was so utterly gorgeous. Everyone knew it too, I'd have to make sure to watch that king. The rumors about him were supported by my colleagues stories, he had wandering eyes and a sense of superiority that led him to cross lines. I wouldn't accept that with Holly.

"Holly." I called for her.

She quickly looked up and then handed her cards to someone else.

"We need to talk." I said when she was closer. I wrapped my fingers around her arm and pulled her away from the others.

"What's wrong?" She asked, and pulled back on my hand. "I can't go far, Yrene is asleep. I have to watch Aelin."

I growled deep in my throat. "You don't have to do anything they say."

"I said I would be there so Yrene could sleep, so yes, I have to." She said too sharply.

"You have to listen to what I have to say." I said instead.

She crossed her arms and waited.

"You haven't been around, but even so, I'm sorry for my actions." I admitted, though it didn't feel as good as should have. Anything for Holly though.

"I haven't been around because I have a demanding job. This isn't going to change very often, if you can't handle that then we shouldn't be married." Holly kept her arms crossed and her tone was forced to even. She would try her best not to give away her feelings, but her scent and rapid heartbeat told me enough. It was obviously a bluff, she wouldn't want us to call off our engagement for anything. Even so her word ground at the last of my restraint and lost my temper. Saying those words weren't right, suggesting we part wasn't right.

"Not everything is a political debate. You have to work for love." I growled at her.

"I am willing to work on it, if you will as well." She softened slightly. That was progress, I guess. I would use this to catalyze fixing our relationship.

"Yes." I grasped for her hands. "Anything for you."


	26. Chapter 26: in-fighting

**Mid-Autumn**

 **Chapter 26: In-Fighting**

 **Dorian:**

After several days of laboring, Aelin was more miserable than I had ever seen her, and I had seen her at some pretty poor times.

Yrene was the only one really qualified to do the job, but Holly had helped with more horse births than Yrene had human babies. Holly and Yrene then took turns napping. We all sat in the living room of the Queen's suite.

Rowan was being even more territorial than ever, seeing his mate in such pain. Lysandra and Elide also took turns napping. None of them wanted to leave Aelin, but Fae births took a long time, and someone had to be well rested when the time finally came.

Holly was laying across the couch with her head in Vaughan's lap. Uller came in. He apparently needed to say goodnight to everyone before he could sleep.

He made to wake Holly up, but Aedion pulled him back before he could, explaining to the boy that he needed to let her sleep. Uller started crying, needing his sister to put him to bed. Vaughan scooted Holly off of his lap and picked the boy up a little roughly and headed out of the room.

Not even five minutes later, Holly was called for. Yrene practically screamed her name from the other room. Holly sprung up from the sleep as if she was waiting for this, and tried to run right into the room. She was dazed from being asleep. Nehemia was playing on the floor with Aedion, as much as the baby could play. He scoped her up off the floor, to avoid Holly trampling her.

She shut the door, that no male was allowed past, except Rowan, with a sharp snap.

It had to be close, there was no other reason for Holly to be needed. Yrene's tone also set me with worry. No other reasons, but bad ones, for the way she called her and for the fact that she was called, at least that I could think of. Or let myself think of.

Rough grunting and bellows came from the room. We all held our breath, winding tight. Waiting for the cry of a baby.

The door to the sitting room opened, from the hall, not the bedroom.

A woman I didn't recognize started bubbling and bowing before us all. She asked over and over for Holly, for the Lady Eldostrom. One of her cheekbones looked sunken, blood leaked from her nose and cheek.

"Vanya," Fenrys gripped her by the arms, shaking a bit more calm into her. "Tell me what's wrong."

"The lord Uller is in danger." She started, tears leaking from her eyes. She didn't get anything else out though before Fenrys demanded his location. She told him that Uller was in the Eldostrom suite. Fenrys disappeared. Lorcan dashed for the door, Chaol took Nehemia from Aedion. Aedion pushed inside the bedroom.

Through the door I could hear the explanation.

"Holly, Uller is in danger." Aedion pushed the breath out with the warning.

"What's wrong?" Her voice was sharper than I had ever heard it.

"I don't know." He admitted.

"Handle it then, I'm a bit busy." Regret and fear laced every pleading word.

"I think you should-" Aedion argued.

"Aedion-" Lysandra snapped. Something must be wrong with Aelin too.

The door opened again and Aedion ran for the other door. The nursemaid followed Aedion, and I was inclined to follow as well. Whatever was happening should be contained to the other side of the castle, as far from Nehemia and Aelin as possible.

I had to run to keep up with her and Aedion. I didn't really know where I was going.

…

 **Holly:**

Aedion had burst in right when I hefted the baby from Yrene's grasp. Blood rushed everywhere, as if the baby had been keeping it all in. I had seen plenty of blood after birth, but horses could afford much more than Aelin.

I didn't bother bundling the baby, but laid her carefully on Aelin's chest. Diving back south to help Yrene. Thank the gods she had magical healing powers.

She told me where to put my hands and what to do. Every second Aelin kept bleeding, every second Aedion didn't come back in to tell me everything was fine, my stress level built.

One thing at a time.

"Okay, go see what's wrong." Yrene said at last. I looked to Aelin who was crying over her baby. Elide and Lysandra were running a bath. Rowan held Aelin.

I dashed from the room. Aelin's blood covered me to the elbows. Other fluids coated my shirt, the knees of my pants.

I ran down the hall, down the stairs, taking the corner fast enough I almost crashed into someone. The halls turned from light green, the walls seemed to grow Oak branches. The door to my room was off of its hinges.

And inside…

Aedion stood with his back to Vaughan, pushing Fenrys back. Fenrys who was shouting at Vaughan. As Vaughan screamed right back at Fenrys. Lorcan had his hands banned around Vaughan, holding him back as well.

Vanya sat at my desk in the corner crying. Dorian stood in the middle taking everything in, his gaze kept going to the door in the bathroom. the tables were upturned and one of the couches had been thrown against the wall, something had been done to produce a similar effect.

"What's going on?" I found myself saying. "Where is Uller?"

"Holly," Vaughan broke form Lorcan and dropped to his knees before me. He gripped my bloody hands, some of it was already drying in flaking bits of reds and browns.

"Don't you dare touch her." Fenrys snarled. He grabbed Vaughan's neck and ripped backwards. He caught himself though and the two fell to the ground and started laying into each other.

Aedion and Lorcan dove for the pair before they could wreck the whole room. The whole rest of the room.

"Uller is locked in the bathroom with Vili." Dorian said tightly.

Whatever was happening could wait until I was sure Uller was alright.

I knocked on the door, calling to them.

VIli unlocked it, candle stick in hand. Something terrible had happened if she didn't feel save in our home.

Uller was just as bloody as I was. Only his was his own blood.

I must have let out some noise. He lifted his head delicately, I crumpled before him. "What happened, love?"

He crawled, painfully into my arms. His whimpers at each movement undid me. Tears streamed down my face.

"Sissy," Uller croaked.

"What happened love?" I asked again.

"I didn't want to go to bed yet, because I hadn't seen you, and I needed you to put me to bed. Vaughan took me, though, and made me go to sleep, and when I kept crying he hurt me. Nurse Vanya, said not to, and then he hit her, and then she threatened to go get you, he hit me again. She called for guards, but none came. She left, but he still was being mean." The story was intruppted by frequent sniffs and crying. I didn't push him, I didn't care if the males outside fought all day.

"I'm going to get someone to heal you. Then we will deal with Vaughan." I declared. "Stay here."

"Holly don't let him fool anymore, please." Vili beseeched me, when I rose to leave.

I didn't have the strength to say a thing back. She had told me about things she heard about him, but I had thought it was jealousy. Now, I couldn't agree more. I had been fooled, at every sign, I had been fooled. No more.

I cracked the door open and looked at the scene. They had stopped fighting, they seemed to be all waiting for me. "Lorcan," I didn't give Vaughan the satisfaction of looking at him. Lorcan cast a warning glance to Vaughan before entering the bathroom.

"Can you heal Uller please." I asked as quietly as I could. He knelt before Uller who squeaked as his nearness.

"He won't hurt you love." Vili said, and squeezed his hand. I leaned against the door, unsure I could I really watch this.

"Sissy!" Uller screaked when Lorcan laid his hands on his torso. I moved next to Lorcan and brushed Uller's hair out of the way. I wasn't sure where I could touch him without hurting him.

"I'm so sorry love. I need you to let Lorcan heal you, then you won't hurt anymore, okay."

He just cried.

"Do it." I said to Lorcan. I turned back to Uller. "Aelin had her baby."

"What is it?" Vili asked.

"The littlest baby girl I have ever seen." I wiped my tears away. Seeing Uller like this hurt.

"Have you seen many babies?" Lorcan joked. I hadn't. This was only the third one I had seen shortly after birth.

"And she can be my friend?" Uller asked.

"Of course." I promised. Lorcan patted my hand, telling me he was done with his task. "I'm going to go talk to everyone, I'll be right back." I was thankful for Lorcan at my back.

Everyone stood at my entrance. I knew I had to do something that I would have never wanted.

"Holly, I want to explain." Vaughan started. I kept my face blank, drawing on the court training and stone-cold demeanor I needed when the lords tried to pull shit.

"I don't care." I looked at him, in his eyes, when I said it. So he would know how much I didn't care about him anymore. He had done the last thing I had ever expected, and something I would never forgive. There were no more chances or fixing things. This was the end.

"You know he acts up all the time. I had to do something about it. Had you given me any attention this week, I wouldn't have been so angry. I'm frustrated with our relationship. I need more of you to state my emotions." He pleaded.

"I think you should be asking for your life, not for more attention. Uller is my brother, he is a lord of Terrasen. I have a demanding job and family. If you're angry at me, you should have spoken to me about it, not take it out on a child and his nurse." I seethed. "You have one minute to leave Orynth, after that you will be killed. You have one day to leave Terrasen, if you ever return, you will be executed."

"You can't do this." His brow furrowed and I thought he would hit me when he took a step closer. Instead he dropped to his knees, "I love you."

"If you loved me you never would have touched Uller." I said harshly, and with bit a relief.

"You don't have the authority." He barked.

"I am hand to the queen," I made a mock of looking around the room, "the queen who is indisposed of. Aedion is captain of security in Ornyth. I think you are the biggest threat here. You are lucky I gave that minute to leave." I snapped.

Tears sprung from his eyes. "Holly, I need you."

"I would prefer to ruin my carpets for some piece of mind, but I gave you a minute. I won't give you the satisfaction to listen you though." I stepped away from him, and back to the bathroom.

…

I was fine. There was no ring to throw at him anyway. He must have always known that we weren't going to work. I had never brought up the mother obstacle to anyone who might know if he even had mother, but it didn't matter anymore. This was the end of the end.

I asked Uller if he wanted to meet the new baby, and he was so excited to. I bathed quickly. When I exited the bath there was no evidence of Vaughan and the fighting. Vanya had been healed. I gave her the rest of the day off and vowed to thank her for helping Uller, and make this up to her.

She of course declared there was nothing I could have done. She was happy to help Uller.

That wasn't true though. I could have done so much better. I shouldn't have trusted the first person that was kind to me. I shouldn't have gotten engaged to the first person I kissed.

The walk back to Aelin's room was very different to the run from it. Fenrys, I could tell, wanted to say something, but I wasn't interested in the words he had to say. In what anyone had to say. Maybe they did kill him. I didn't want to know, and I didn't care.

Aelin and Rowan looked better. The baby was being held by Lysandra. Uller climbed up on the large bed to see better. He climbed right up to the sleeping princess and peered at her face.

"Hello, little baby." He whispered. "Hello there."

I burst into tears. This little boy was the sweetest thing the world.

Uller pressed still closer, until Lysandra looked up for a bit of help. Still he said, "Hello, what is your name. I have to know if we are going to best friends."

"Her name is Rainsly." Rowan offered Uller softly.

"She's my best friend." He told Rowan confidently.

"I'm sure she'll agree with that." He answered.


	27. Chapter 27: Fallout

**Hi all!**

 **I wanted to thank you all for all the support! I also wanted to share that I have completed the story! While you won't read the end for a bit yet, it is finished (maybe not edited quite well yet). As school is almost out, I look forward to working on other projects. One will be A Court of Glass and Shadows, which already some content out. For more up-to-date updates about my writing check out my profile, I update there all the time.**

* * *

 **Chapter 27: Fallout**

 **Mid-autumn**

 **Fenrys:**

After the room was put back into order, and we had all met Rainsley, Holly trudged back to her room.

We all watched her, pulling a reluctant Uller along with her. Vili had some engagement to attend. She was getting popular, and didn't want word to get out about Vaughan. It would, we all knew it was only a matter time. After news of Rainsley was old, then they would notice the absence of the former soon-to-be lord Eldostrom.

After they left, Aedion told us everything he knew had been happening, how the outburst in the dining room the other day was related. We all nodded and hung on his words. It was desperate, sadness, needing to know how to help, how to be there.

There wasn't anything we could really do. Wait for her to recover from the heartbreak. From having her trust broken. From betrayal. Aelin made a comment about Holly never having learned the hard part of governing. Not being able to trust anyone, and most everyone disagreed.

We talked about what little we knew about the attack on her manor. We talked about her, and eventually I couldn't take it anymore. Talking about Holly, and not being there for her, I couldn't breathe because of it.

I left and went to her rooms.

Suddenly nervous, I knocked on her door, but it was broken and swung open by itself. She had brought a bundle of blankets before the fire and made a little nest.

She was crying too hard to hear me come in. I turned into my wolf form.

I padded in front of her, and she acknowledged my presence by trying to stem her tears. I didn't care about that though. I nudged my snout in between her arms curled around her. She seemed to understand because she lay down and cried into my fur instead.

The others stopped in after she had fallen asleep, exhausting herself from sobbing so hard. I would have to heal her face from the puffiness in the morning.

They made quiet comments about how smart and kind I was, but I knew anyone one of them would be in my place. I only got fed up with the discussion first. We would have to fix the door soon to preserve Holly's privacy.

….

 **Holly:**

I knew we were a family, but I was getting annoyed with all of the visits from everyone. It was as if they were treating me like glass. Even Dorian had come to sit with me sometimes. I usually buried myself in a book or went on a long ride with Uller. Dorian was a good rider, but he must have been told to leave me alone when I rode.

There was no reprieve from the mess of feelings and certainly none from the fear that Vaughan would return and hurt Uller.

I needed to find a solution to all of this soon. I would have to get over myself soon.

Vili came to tell me all of the gossip and issues plaguing our great country. She wanted more responsibility, and I had no problem with her taking over the Eldostrom territory issues, I had other things I would have to get back to soon. It felt good to teach her, to advise her. We had a similar schooling, but mine had been more than seven years longer.

…

 **Fenrys:**

Holly had been lost for a few days. She never let Uller out of her sight, and followed him wherever she wished to go. A banker had made an urgent appointment, that had ending with him rushing out of her office quickly. Whatever he had told her, or vise verse, was not appreciated.

There was much hush around the castle, as if everyone felt the blow Vaughan had dealt. Servants now openly talked about how rude he was, lords talked about how foolish Holly had been, other lords talked about wanting to marry her. Everyday Holly spent without talking to us, we all felt. I watched her pretend her vacation was just that, even as I saw the winding tight of her heartbreak.

We let it go on for a while, maybe longer than it should have.

Every interaction, it was clear she was a ghost in her own skin. Dorian and Choal and Yrene, stayed. Their mail and work was sent up here until they returned, it was not the worst thing to continue that for a few more days.

They stayed for a few reasons. They needed Holly's advice. Dorian was working on a treaty for the alliance countries to sign, and Ardarlan was out of money.

They had heard that Holy had miraculously found money to help Terrasen, and we didn't dare tell them otherwise. Holly was a genius at solving problems, even if she could only protect one giant sum on money in her life.

Everyday it became more and more obvious that they needed to return, and yet they didn't push us talking to Holly, asking for her help. I overheard them arguing over hold long to stay for, whether Yrene should talk to her. It was fine as they never actually did anything, until Dorian received a letter from his mother.

"She's undoing all the work I have started." Dorian declared over dinner. Holly didn't even bother to look up from cutting Uller's meat. "My mother is going to destroy everything because she wants me to marry."

We had planned this to get Holly back into the swing of things.

"What do I do?" Dorian made a good show of banging his head against the back of his chair and moaning. Aelin had to bite her lip to keep from laughing.

Holly noticed no one answered him and looked up around at everyone. So, she was all there.

Uller chimed in, "Then get married."

"To whom?" Dorian asked the boy and Holly flinched just a bit.

"Well, Sissy isn't getting married anymore." Uller said and smiled broadly.

We didn't breathe as we waited for Holly to react.

"I don't think I want to be queen." Holly said to her little brother, then pushed out of her chair, and left the dining room.

"Is she mad at me?" Uller asked before the door closed.

"No," we all said quickly.

"She's just heart broken, and her trust was broken too. She loves you very much and doesn't want anyone to ever hurt you again." Elide promptly.

"Well, I knew she liked him, so I never said anything it."

"About what?" Elide asked with a fake smile plastered on.

"About Vaughan." Uller seemed to shrink.

"Did he hurt you before the day we found out?" Aelin asked sharply.

The boy curved in on himself. Uller refused to say anything more.

"I'm sorry love." Elide said before throwing a sharp glance at Aelin to stop with the questions.

"I never liked him." Ren declared.

"Nor did I." Aelin echoed.

"I did," I said quietly. "That was before he was committed, before he was around children."

"We should hunt him down and kill him." Lorcan growled quietly enough that only a handful of us heard.

"Holly made her decision on the matter clear. Exiled from Terrasen. Should he ever be spotted in Adarlan, I will echo the order." Dorian said evenly, the voice of reason.

The door opened slowly. Holly reappeared with a book under her arm.

"King Dorian." She said, and thumped the book down on the table. "I propose to you a solution."

"Just Dorian, we are friends now." His smile was quick and practiced, but genuine.

She flipped idly through the book as she explained, "there was once a time where Wendlyn was new and poor country. Started by humans fleeing the Fae, their leader had no money, for a much-needed army, or transportation away from the Fae. He was desperate." Holly started. "He proposed to all the women with money enough, his hand. They came, and there was a competition, of sorts. Only to compete there was a fee. A fair fee, but in the end, no one could solve his riddle. So, he married no one, but funded an army."

"You want me to do this?" Dorian seemed intrigued, but worried.

"It's a little underhanded, but yes. Your other option is Rainsley, and she's a bit young." Holly said tartly.

"Make the riddle something only Manon could answer." Aelin snorted quietly.

"I think your mother would be pleased by it, but I wouldn't tell the whole truth of your plans." Holly amended.

"Will you be helping with competition?" Dorian asked.

"Only if you can't come up with any riddles." She answered sarcastically.

It was the first emotion other than despair and regret.

"Well I think I'll need help." He smirked.

"You already write me often enough." Holly shut the book with a snap and handed it to Dorian.


	28. Chapter 28: Rifthold

**Hi All,**

 **I wanted to first apologize, it's dead week at school and I have finals next week, so I missed the Friday posting! I'll post 2 chapters today to make up for it! I also was kind of shocked by the response to the Vaughan twist. A lot of people were supportive of it, some were a little confused. I am (always) growing as a writer, but I did try to put some subtle hints since chapter 16 about his jealously. Whether you liked the turn or not, I'm glad for the feedback! I will say that we haven't seen the last of Vaughan, and I have completed all but 1 chapter of the story, leaving us with a total of 41 chapters for this story!**

 **THANKS SO MUCH!**

 **-Fishy**

* * *

 **Chapter 28: Rifthold**

 **Late Autumn:**

 **Holly:**

"I've already made the decision." Aelin lectured. How odd to have an argument with your queen while she was breastfeeding her newborn, with a foreign king on the couch across from her. It wasn't odd when she thought of everyone as a family, but I was still realizing how deep the friendship between everyone went.

"I don't want to go. I have too much work to do as it is." I whined. It wasn't much of argument.

"Dorian's work with the treaty is far more important." Aelin snapped.

"I can't leave Terrasen." Tears sprung from my eyes at the thought.

"You are doing Terrasen more good by going." Aelin sighed. She understood, I knew she did. "You have to go, I need it done, and I need done right."

"Who will do my job?" I snapped back.

"Things will be sent to you daily, and Aedion will handle the urgent problems." Aelin relented to my question even though I had asked it a hundred times already.

I didn't want to go, and she couldn't make me.

"I need this done. Write it in six months, have the summit in the summer." She instructed. "I will order you to go if I need to."

I looked her in the eye. I had no fight, no real power. I had no idea how I would survive this trip.

"I'll leave Vili to tend to the Eldostrom part of things around here, but someone has to teach her, help her. I'll take Uller with me." I finally relented.

Aelin nodded to my demands.

"We leave at sunset." Dorian said as he pushed himself to his feet.

…

Upon our arrival, the people came in droves to see their king.

At the front of the crowd was Dorian's mother. The queen I was meant to trick into this scheme under the guise of me competing and Dorian throwing the competition. Dorian had laid it all out for me, and while I wasn't fond of the idea, I knew his mother would not believe that he completely changed his mind on marriage. He wanted her to think that I knew the answer to the riddle, and that I would be answering it after enough funds were made.

He told me how to act in front of his mother, how to be the perfect girl, Lady, Hand, Queen. I didn't listen. I had gone through the training already. I almost told him, but there had once been talk of me being married off to him in exchange for peace between our countries, I was high enough rank, but still the spare. Elide was to be the most power woman next to Aelin, and together they could have crushed the king, as long as I was distracting him.

I didn't need to be told how to pretend. I had no interest in it either. It was easier to let him talk.

We disembarked the ship. Here, to the crowd Dorian would announce his competition. The first guess is free, but every guess after that was ten gold coins. He didn't want to take money from the poor.

I was excited to hear his riddle, he hadn't told me either, but I would find the answer just for the satisfaction.

He stood before everyone, and for all world he looked like a good king. An eager king, and bit regretful. He explained the premise that one day a week, he would welcome guests, how they would keep track of the women, and the cost of another guess. He then told everyone what the riddle was. "What am I to the moon?"

Choal and Yrene grinned as if they already knew the answer. Well if it was that easy, he would have to marry someone. Is that what he intended?

I guess it didn't matter. It was his life, I just here until summer.

…

Where Aelin did away with all the fanfare, choosing to walk or ride through the city, Dorian made up for it. He put us on an open carriage so we could ride through the city and see all the sights, and all the people.

I was near enough having to mediate when the glass castle came into view. I had been told it was shattered, but now it was rebuilt. It was grossly enormous. Three towers, still under construction, sat to the side of it.

Yrene talked about one of the towers and how it was to be the North Torre for healing, another would be a school open to anyone, and the third would be for science and technology. It was brilliant. The pillars of the country. I loved a good symbol.

They prattled on, talking about the changes to Rifthold the whole ride. I had never been here before, so it didn't mean too much to me. They just kept talking and talking. Soon Queen Georgina dominated the conversation and launched into an interrogation of her son. Why he would ever make such a stupid decision, it wasn't like he let just anyone be Queen. He must tell her the answer to the riddle so that she could choose the winner. And on and on she talked. I was starting to understand his attitude the other day at dinner.

"Your majesty," I intruppted.

She gave me an amused look. "Yes, dear."

"Dorian didn't exactly intend for just anyone to answer the riddle." I gave her a small, but suggestive smile.

She raised a brow. "And who are you."

Dorian moved across the seat to sit next to me. "This is Holly Eldostrom. She is hand to Queen Aelin, and head of one of Terrasen's great houses."

"A lady then?" she narrowed her eyes at my overalls.

"Yes." I answered, a bit breathlessly. A lovesick fool, I wanted to vomit.

"You'll join me for lunch to see if I approve of this match." She said finally.

"Mother," Dorian warned.

It was easy to play along. If this pretending for a few months was how we got her off of his back enough to write the treaty, then I could deal with the attention.

…

Before we got fully settled, Dorian took me on a tour of the castle. A never ending tour in which I wore the wrong the shoes, so my heels were raw before we even half done.

Dorian showed me all of the newly furnished sitting rooms—well everything was newly furnished, and decorated, and built. The witches had wrecked the castle quite thoroughly.

On the way through the halls, Dorian stopped at every servant and guard and introduced me. I couldn't remember where we were, much less who anyone was. I would, however, be more comfortable asking people for directions since I had met so many of them already.

Dorian made a huge deal about our last stop. Telling me how grand, and old, and gorgeous, and hundred other adjectives it was.

The doors to this room must had been fifty feet tall. They are solid, and etched with designs of kings of old. Deep gouges and burn marks ran the height of where one could reach. It looked like the witches had been trying to claw their way into the door, and when that didn't work, burn their way in.

Dorian told me as much, detailing the heroics of the librarians inside. How they held on to the most valuable resource they had here, knowledge.

And when the doors opened, well, I cried. How much had been lost in the past decade? How much knowledge and culture had been taken from us? And this, well, I had never imagined so many books in one place, whole.

I would bet they had anything I could ever dream of reading.

There was all of this strife, still, and yet the books were whole. It seemed like nothing so bad could happen when we had this.

Dorian returned me to my own office, close to his own public office. Because he had two, and his room, which he admitted he spent the most time in.

I knew I was going to be busy here.

Caring for Uller was a fulltime job in itself, being Hand even with Aedion's help in the North took more time than anything, and I would be writing a treaty too, and being the token Terrasen representative anytime someone came for a political visit. I hoped we would be able to make the treaty priority otherwise I would be stuck here for a very long time. I had waited so, so long to get back to Ornyth, and I needed be home. Being sent here had hurt my heart. I needed my family and my friends, but at least this was temporary.

At least I hadn't been sent to some far away country in a trade for troops. I would have be grateful for that. I would go home in the summer if we could get the work done in time. All I had to do was survive until summer.


	29. Chapter 29: Queen Georgina

**Chapter 29: Queen Georgina**

 **Late Autumn:**

 **Holly:**

Over lunch the next week Queen Georgina continued her interrogation. She wanted to know everything. Dorian decided to join us though, to spare me.

He admitted that I had to figure out the riddle as well, but he knew I could do it.

I told her I already had a few guesses, but none I thought was right.

She asked about my hobbies, to which I answered horses, work, and Uller.

Uller was her favorite topic. She was delighted with him. She was desperate for another child, and Uller was young enough to spoil still. I was a bit nervous at the prospect, but she started her list of things to get him with tutors so I really couldn't complain too much. Dorian was brilliant so I knew she would choose the best for Uller as well. I knew bringing him here I wouldn't be able to be around him as much as I would like, but I knew I could function if he had been left with Vili.

Choal's mother had also joined us, and she made a comment about a horse named Farsha that I should met, to see if I could make her suitable. Normally I would have not gone anywhere near horses that were not my own, but I had left mine in Ornyth. My heart was already aching for them.

Dorian said he had sent for an Asterion horse for our engagement present. For that I raised brow at him when no one was looking. He didn't have money for that. That was the point of the competition.

He only shrugged.

On and on lunch seemed to stretch. Queen Georgina tried to set up meetings with wedding planners, but we refused her. In order to keep up with appearances for the competition.

She finally relented when she said it was a good way to make money. Dorian, I could tell wanted to vomit at the idea of taking his people's money. It was really the only way. The only thing left.

The money was evident in my rooms. The rooms I had been given were very bare. Uller's had only a bed and tub. No dresser, no chest, no side tables. Mine had all the usual things, but they didn't look fine or ancient, just bare and basic. Not that I needed such fine things.

"We will have find you a suitable gown for Yulesmas, young lady." Queen Georgina said at one point. To which Dorian told his mother not to worry about it. Again, I was surprised at this. The queen seemed satisfied by it though. She didn't like my overalls, and I rarely had worn dresses since coming here. She seemed to understand this meant something.

Dorian and Choal's brothers appeared from a fold in the garden to steal cakes. They were made to sit and converse politely. They targeted in on Uller and asked if my toddler brother wanted to play with the teenaged boys. Dorian shut it down before I could. I was not interested in them corrupting my brother. Dorian knew I was more protective of Uller than usual, following recent events.

The boys, all three of them, pouted. Hollin tried to kiss my hand, but slobbered on it. I smiled politely, but whipped the spit on Dorian's leg surreptitiously.

….

After lunch we went to the stables to see Farsha. Choal and Dorian led the way.

"I don't mean to scare you, but Farsha is Hella's horse. Truly." Yrene said before disappearing with Nehmeria.

"She's aggressive, but not evil." Choal smirked at his fleeing wife.

"That's a good way to describe Hella's or Lorcan." I joked. They didn't laugh.

The horse was gorgeous. The stable hands stayed close by when we inspected her. The rich black coat looked pristine. Not a war horse, but a warrior herself.

They stayed back a bit, but when I unlocked the paddock, they rushed forward to close it. Choal advised me to let someone else led her out to the track. I demanded a good reason for that. To which he told me that I would be trampled by her. I rolled my eyes.

"Hello, Farsha. I have a few things to tell you." I said to the horse. She seemed to lower her head to hear me better. "The war is over, and warriors must find something else to do with their time."

She seemed to agree. "I would like to race you. I know you will show everyone how magnificent you are, and I promise no matter fast you go, I won't fall off."

Farsha nudged my hand under nose. She huffed and puffed at my scent. She stayed calm.

"Let's go for a first ride then." I smiled at her. I lifted the heavy saddle myself and did all the straps up. That felt like stretching after a long time asleep. It felt like waking up.

I led Farsha out of the stables, and then put my foot in one of the stirrups, but they were set Choal's length.

Several people rushed to help me into the saddle, but all they did was spook Farsha. I had no choice but to swing up into the saddle before they caused her to lose any trust in me at all.

…

DORIAN:

I had never seen Farsha hold so still. I have seen Farsha do anything but bite at anyone who wanted to saddle her, and yet she let Holly do it.

And when Holly led her to the track, they went slow. Something that Farsha didn't do either.

On the next pass, Holly stopped Farsha, at a line. She was talking to her, that was clear, but whatever she was saying it was about her and horse.

Moments later they took off around the track, faster than I could comprehend going.

They ran around at top speed for several laps. This would be Holly's joy then.

She was beaming at Farsha, and beaming at riding again.

"Well, your trails are lacking, but Farsha is finest horse here." She laughed.

"We will make trails for your highness, if it pleases you." One of the stable hands offered, I hadn't realized they had followed us out to see her ride. Holly laughed at that too.

"I'm just a lady. And not one who can order any landscaping." She slid off of Farsha and hit the ground with a loud smack on the cobblestones.

"What's next?" She asked me with just the hint of smile.

"Back to work, I'm afraid." I shrugged and took her arm.


	30. Chapter 30: Return

**Chapter 30: Return**

 **Early Winter:**

 **Two Weeks Later:**

 **Fenrys:**

Holly was having a difficult time here. She went out on frequent walks with Farsha who walked dutifully by her side, not rushing forward or stopping a bit. The changes she had instantly wrought in the mare were remarkable.

I was her guard, but dogging her steps would win no one's favor.

I stood on the castle walls watching them cut a path through the snow on the Dorians newly rebuilt dog track. Farsha calmed down significantly with the snow and Holly.

Their slow path was difficult to watch especially since the guards were training right below me. It was an effort to not call out corrections, and even more an effort to stay up here where I could keep an eye on Holly. She would laugh at me of course, but she was outside the castle walls. I don't think I could bare to tell Aelin that her friend was hurt or worse.

The fiends had had enough time to lick their wounds that I expected the crime rate to rise swiftly.

 **Holly:**

Trudging through the snow was good. The cold air burned my lungs and Farsha didn't mind my blathering about the issues I was trying to solve.

Aelin had sent me south to work on the treaty with Dorian, but it seemed like Dorian was just here to supervise me. He had done no work prior, he hadn't even asked the librarians to pull records of past treaties. I did, but they only had one very dusty book from when all the lands were ruled by fae and witch. The only other treaty in the book was when Elena married Gavin, securing Ardarlan from Terrasen rule.

I had written to the witch queen, Manon asking after her records and received a short response.

" _We have no Iron Teeth records. Here are copies of the Crochan treaties with the humans."_

-Petra

I didn't know who Petra was, but when Dorian saw the note on my desk he launched into a questioning and warning manner. It had come with a very short stack of notes each with a date and name I didn't recognize, followed by the area the witches wouldn't attack in exchange for food subsidies.

Dorian had been incensed I had written to Manon without consulting him, but then again, he wasn't my king. It was clear he was angry more at bringing up Manon, and not that I sought out information.

Whatever that subject was, it wasn't mine to pry at. I didn't want him asking about Vaughan after all.

When the treaty summit was drawing near, I would have to talk to him about, make sure whatever his issues were wouldn't interfere with our future.

I talked to Farsha about the difficulties with Uller. He was adamant about spending time with the older children, which I didn't particularly want him around them yet. He was so sweet and pure and Dorian's brother was the opposite. Dorian's brother however, had always wanted a younger brother, and Uller was the perfect victim. Only every time Uller told me about their adventures they weren't the terrible exchanges I had braced for.

I resigned to letting him spend only one a day a week with them. They were far from the same level of tutelage so I didn't have to worry about them then.

"Holly." A male voice said. I looked automatically to Farsha, but she couldn't talk. The voice was not female, or even horse. "Holly."

I spun around in the snow, startling Farsha who trotted around me to get in the same position.

Vaughan stood in the snow. No footprints, so he must have flown here.

"What are you doing here?" I asked as evenly as I could. I knew my cheeks were red from the snow and my nose was running a bit.

"I came to see you. To apologize." He took a step forward and Farsha snorted dangerously. She knew I was afraid.

"I don't want you here. I don't to see you. I don't want an apology." I repeated, maybe he would get it now.

"I need to explain. I need you to understand."

"There is nothing to understand, you hurt my brother because you were upset with me not giving you attention. You're a brash, violent, vile person I don't want to be around." I shouted the words. Maybe Fenrys would hear me and come. I knew he was watching me.

"You have to understand that I didn't mean to do anything—"

"I don't have to understand." I snapped, but he kept going right under me.

"to Uller. He was misbehaving and I was stressed from the fight, Aelin's pregnancy, and you not responding to my desires. I hadn't been unwound in a long time, Holly."

"You'll never see him again," I swore.

"It isn't him I want to see." He snapped, his temper drew up too much magic, even I could feel it. That wasn't even the worse part.

I had worried that Vaughan wouldn't care for Uller as I needed someone who might fill the father role should. But having him say he didn't care about him confirmed it. He never loved Uller. He was pretending—for me. He was pretending to be attached my little brother so I would love him more. It was all a lie, not just the intimacy—or lack of. All of it that mattered was a lie.

I didn't bother to respond. I didn't think I had the strength to counter his blatant disregard with something other than tears and threats.

Fenrys can deal with him when I get back into the castle.

"Holly!" He stormed after me, but Farsha reared herself and tried to slam down on him, but he was too quick. At least he didn't hurt her. "Holly! Come back here and talk to me!"

I felt him reach for me, but just before he locked his hand around my elbow a great force slammed him back. He flew to the other side of the track and smacked against the gate.

Guards flooded from the nearest gate, Fenrys appeared beside me, checking me for injuries before vanishing to where Vaughan was recovering his wits.

Dorian and Choal charged out of the gate on horses each.

"I saw him grab for you." Dorian said calmly. "What do you want me to do with him?"

"Just banish him." I hoped my words sounded as heavy as my heart.

The guards parted for me and Farsha and we followed their path of upturned snow back into the castle walls.

…

Yrene wrapped me with more blankets than I could count.

She lectured me about being out in the cold for so long.

When the males came in I couldn't bear to look at any of them and buried myself completely beneath the blankets.

Fenrys turned into him wolf and slid under the blankets. Something he hadn't done for awhile. He normally slept at the foot of my bed, but we never touched, or rarely did. This was meant to make me feel better, but I just felt stifled. I felt watched.

What would had happened if Uller had been there.

"He didn't seem violent, just that he wanted to talk. He would have likely used him to get you to listen, however." Chaol answered. I hadn't realized said the words out loud.

I just needed to be left to wallow in my shame. My foolish, trusting heart. I wasn't a girl who lived in the middle of no where and baked all day. No matter how much I wanted to be that girl. I wasn't. Not anymore. How much had that girl wanted to help her friends. How I had I wanted to leave that place to fight for my home. And I didn't.

I didn't leave because of my brother, and yet I had put him in danger more so.

I was so stupid.

I didn't belong in a court where the king couldn't trust his own mother. Where the only friends I had were standing in this room, and I known them for only a few weeks. This wasn't how my life was supposed to go. It was only supposed to be hard in the board rooms and offices.

"We don't expect you to want to be here when you've only just returned to Orynth." Dorian answered softly.

I whipped my nose and nodded.

"We are going to start working on this treaty, for real, two hours or more a day. Even if it means saying up until morning to get it done." Dorian promised. "The sooner we get it done, the faster you can get back home."

"Alright." I agreed a bit numb.

"And we will have meal together, and do other things together." Yrene instructed us. I nodded again, not quite sure I could say no.

"We will make it work, Holly." Fenrys vowed to me after they all had left. I wanted to believe him, but I just needed a good cry.


	31. Chapter 31: Glass

**Chapter 31: Glass**

 **ONE MONTH LATER: EARLY DECEMBER**

 **Holly:**

Things had changed. Drastically. We still didn't have time to work on the treaty during the days, and so Dorian and I would stay up half the night working on it. Aelin wanted it done by summer, and while she wouldn't want to sign something that wasn't put together well, I knew the sooner there was something formal between the countries, the better.

Life among the Ardarlan nobles was not pleasant. None of prettily dressed girls were fooled by the fake plan. They constantly bombarded me with questions about the riddle, though I had to admit that I didn't know the answer yet. Once a week for twelve grueling hours we would stand in the throne room and hear guess, after guess, after guess. Many the same, the sun, a king, a star, golden, light, a hero, the bringer of light, and on and on and on and on. Some guessed ridiculous answers. Such as a clock, various letters, a tree, and glass.

I thought it had something to do with love. Since I wasn't competing for his hand, despite us making everyone think that, I wasn't too concerned. The money that came from the noblewomen was astounding. Now that we had been doing this for weeks, foreign ladies had come to guess, or sent guessers on their behalf. Dorian was polite but firm with his refusal when they couldn't guess it after many, many tries.

My mail came in only once a week, and was sent back a week later with the same messenger, Nox Owen. There were few people Aelin trusted with the sensitive things I received. She paid him well, and he was as devoted to Terrasen as anyone. I would hand him the completed documents and letters from the week prior, and then set right to work on the new ones. That usually gave a one or two day lull in the work load, since I couldn't stand to not have things complete upon his arrival.

In recent days I had set to exploring the castle. Aelin had told me about the hidden passages and hidden rooms. The new glass portion of the castle had also been built with new surprises.

My favorite room was the new ballroom. The whole thing was glass, you could see through the floor over the courtyard, and above through to the stars. The walls were all one piece of colored glass. The little stage for the orchestra also was glass. There was star shaped clear hole in the north facing wall, one that the Lord of the North stood center in. Though it was far too nicely cut and glittering for home, I felt most like myself in the ballroom. The giant room with no one but myself, usually in the dark. Sometimes Fenrys would come with me and we would lay and look at the stars or the Lord of the North, always reminding us where we belonged.

On this night though, it was Dorian who sought me out. Behind him trailed a rolling tray.

"What's this?" I asked, not quite sure what I wanted it to be what I thought it was.

Dorian spread another blanket on the ground and sat. "I thought we were due for a night off."

"Oh no, I was just on my way up." I said suddenly, I must have forgotten what time it was.

"I thought since Choal and Yrene are away to Arielle, we should have our own excursion away from my rooms." He said with a sweet drawl. So, this was an attempt to romance me. "And after dinner we can get to work."

"Alright, but only if there is desert." I sighed.

Dorian began unloading cart and we lapsed into eating and making comments about the stars, and Yulesmas coming very soon.

When I had finished my meal, I asked, "Why did you do all of this, really?"

Dorian set down his fork slowly, choosing his words carefully. "For two reasons. My mother expects me to be making more of an effort to win you over, she thinks you aren't interested enough, and because there is a group of witches coming to answer my riddle and I need you act more in love with me."

"I don't think I can fool witches, and your mother." I intruppted, a bit indignantly.

"Hench, the dessert, Maybe you'll actually fall in love with me." He gave a dazzling smile.

I offered no quarter to it, merely staring back unimpressed. "That isn't what we agreed to." I was bit discouraged by his request.

He huffed out a nervous breath, well maybe nervous was a bit too far, but at least a strained breath. "I don't know if it is because we both were tragically broken up with at close times, or because you really are the one for me-" He blurted the words. I quickly held up my hand and he stopped. This wasn't right.

That just couldn't be true. There had to be some other impending reason, and the only would be the witches. "You're scared the witches will know the answer?" I asked in disbelief. It made sense. He wasn't really to try and win my heart, but my loyalty. I hated myself for being surprised. He was a Havillard after all.

Wit his first plan failed, he sighed and offered me what I could only take as the truth. "I once told Maeve that there would be only witch that could be my queen, but you are far from a witch. You are kind, and generous, and strong, and everything that a queen needs to be."

My eyes were burning, I wasn't even sure what he really wanted anymore. I knew I wanted to stop talking about it. About _us_.

I dropped my empty plate back onto the cart and reached for the stack of books and papers. "Let's get the tariffs done tonight, there is no reason to get them perfect everyone will argue over them when we have the summit."

"Holly, I didn't mean-" he started but a look from me stopped him.

"I will play the part you need me to, but I have no intention of marrying you." I said harshly. "I won't marry someone who is in love with someone else, or some idea of me."

"I know, but we can't seem like strangers." He added with a plate of some chocolaty looking desert. "Let's make a plan, Holly. One that we are both comfortable with."


	32. Chapter 32: Manon

**Chapter 32: Manon**

 **EARLY DECEMBER**

 **HOLLY:**

My heart was heavy when we went to the throne room, we had added a special day just for the witches to guess. One witch, stood to the side, watching them. She stood too straight, and acted too bored to be casual. She was too beautiful. My fake love interest in Dorian seemed even more odd since he would never fall for me after her. Who would want the golden haired wild child in compared to the eternal beauty of the moon.

"That's Manon," Yrene whispered in passing.

The moon and Manon, I was a fool. The whole riddle was really for her. At least I wasn't actually in love in Dorian, but I still felt that betrayal a bit. I felt dubbed.

This whole situation was shitty. Did Dorian really want me to act like his lover in front of the witch he was in love with. I tried to catch his eye to ask, but there was no way I could, when he was looking at the paper someone had handed him. Likely he took so long to read it, so he didn't have to look at Manon.

The witches offered philosophical or religious answers. None of them were right. After the guessing paused for lunch, the witches were invited to join us in the dining room.

Nearly one hundred witches had come to guess, but only ten were invited to the dining hall. The others ate somewhere else, or someone else.

Dorian caught my arm right before going in, and quickly affirmed that he wanted me to play my part of being generously in love with him, and he would do the same. I didn't want to make Manon jealous, it was never my intent to hurt anyone with real feelings for Dorian. This was supposed to be a distraction for his mother and a way to raise money covertly.

Even if she was the one who had broken things off, her odd eyes tracked him, and me. Fenrys stuck close by. Uller joined us for lunch, which was not a normal occurrence, but this meeting was important and he was the third representative of Terrasen, even if he was a child. He asked to sit with Terrin and Hollin, and to forgo whining, I relented, Queen Georgina sat on that end of the table as well.

The witches were quick to pick him out.

"Who is that?" The Crochan on Manon's right asked. She looked like the sort to break bones under light insults. I was fairly confident her name was Bronwen, but not certain.

"My brother." I answered evenly.

"Your parents were human, and had children so far apart?" Another asked, she wore the robes of a religious follower, and was the Blueblood matron. She and the other witch that had spoken to me had not guessed at Dorian's riddle.

Could they smell my witch blood? Should I lie? I waited just a bit too long to answer, so the witch answered for me, "my apologizes, I'm still learning human etiquette." The Blueblood said not unkindly.

"It's just a hard question for me to answer since my mother died giving birth to Uller." I decided to take the excuse they handed me.

"I'm sorry." She said sweetly. It wasn't a matronly sweet, but trying not to scare me before the slaughter sweet.

I nodded, but said nothing more. So much for convincing them I was in love. I was more concerned about convincing them I wasn't the main course. Dorian however used the opportunity to whisper something kind in my ear, making clear we were friends, if not more. If witch hearing was anything like Fae, they could hear what he said.

Yrene's eyes flashed in warning across the table. I knew this was dangerous game, one I really, really didn't want to play.

"How is the Queen?" Manon asked me. Digging her golden eyes into me. She was descended from queens upon queens, but once our ancestors had been allies. I had the blood of Brannon of Wildfire, even I had no magic or fighting skill. I was not her enemy, I was not her prey. I met her gaze, throwing any ounce of trepidation out of the window. We had unofficial peace, but I that didn't mean she should frighten me or appear to frighten me.

"She is doing well, I get weekly updates on exactly how she is recovering from motherhood, updates that she sends to Yrene, but addresses to me so I might hear every very personal detail." I smiled at my joke.

"We heard she had a girl, but will the girl be heir?" Bronwen asked. She kept her face too low to the table so she cold scrape the food into her mouth easier. No one seemed to mind, but I didn't know whether it was polite to look her in to the eye when she was doing it. I did anyway.

"She is named crown princess, I think that Aelin is more interested in the Southern continents way of choosing who is best for the job, so if she has many children, she likely will encourage the most suited to claim the monarchy, and the others to find jobs better suited for their skill set." I recited.

"She said this to you?" Choal asked concerned.

"No, this is speculation." I clarified. We discussed many things before Terrasen's fall, our future children had been one of them.

"You were friends as children?" The Blueblood witch asked. Could she read my mind, or was it the logical flow?

"For a short while, my father didn't want me corrupted by the court. I was only brought there after Marion and Evalin convinced my mother I needed to build lasting relationships, at a young age." I put down my fork. If this was interrogation I might as well eat later.

"I was told it was for another reason." The elder witch said coyly. "The little fire princess had no friends, and she needed someone fearless to be that for her."

"Whoever told you she had no friends was perhaps referring to her lack of female of friendships. Aedion and Ren were brutally finding for her favor and her love in any manner, since the day she was born." I corrected her a bit sharply. I was starting to think that these witches only listened to things with a pointy end.

"And you were friendly with Ren? There was talk of your wedding only a few months ago, but I don't remember who it was to." Bronwen went on the attack.

"Ren was one of the reasons my engagement was broken off." I told them, forcing just the barest hint of a smile.

"Who was it to?" The Blueblood asked, too casually.

"A Fae lord, one of Maeve's Cadre." Fenrys answered for me.

"Oh, one of your blood brothers then?" She eyed Fenrys as if he was meal. "I quite like how the Fae taste. Why ever would you break off an engagement with him?"

I almost spat out my wine. "I don't like to be controlled. I fell in love with him outside if court, but when I returned to court, he was problematic. I have no interest in males who think they can _allow_ me to do anything." I tried to sound wise, but I just sounded sad. They took my words in carefully. Knowing that I wasn't the pretty doll princess that they had thought Dorian had wrapped around his finger.

"Good for you," was all Manon said.

…

The witches stayed the night, but were to leave early in the morning.

I had thought that we were done entertaining them after the dinner meal.

So, I tucked Uller into bed and went to Dorian's tower to work on the treaty. And like every night fell asleep on the floor surrounded by books and charts and records and drafts of the treaty.

When Dorian nudged me awake to a low burning fire and a white haired witch, I was not pleased by the drool on my face, and I couldn't hide my dissatisfaction with Dorian at being woken up.

"Manon would like to chat with you. Privately." He informed me.

I blinked groggily at him, and unbeknownst me, she was already in the room, so I said, "likely so she can feed me to her Wrvyen."

"Holly." Dorian's eyes widened, but his tone was hardly a reprimand.

I realized my mistake as soon as I sat up.

"Abroxs is on a special diet that doesn't involve people." Manon said without blinking, "they're too boney."

I think she joked.

I groaned and stretched. "As long as it's in one bite. I don't mind too much. I won't have to sleep on the floor or couch anymore." Fenrys was likely down with Uller at this hour.

"I told you, you can—" Dorian got out.

I cut Dorian a glance that was clear he would not be suggesting I sleep in his bed, right in front of his ex-lover.

"Does privately include you?" I asked lightly, not so subtly suggesting he get out of here.

He gave Manon the first real exchange I had seen. It was clear she wasn't going to force him to leave, but wanted him to. He quickly strode out of the room and down the many flights of stairs.

"The last time I was in the King's Tower, the castle was still under construction." Manon started. I let her talk. "After the war, I was foolish, and I was broken. I lost much. So, I pushed Dorian away too. He was just as broken and lost. I shouldn't have. But now he has someone who will be a strong, kind queen. Someone who he doesn't have to ever worry about not being good enough, or not be able to find the solutions he needs. You're perfect for him."

"I am perfect for the king, but Dorian doesn't love me." I kept my voice firm and even.

She didn't bother smiling, "He does, but perhaps there is still a passion missing."

"I don't understand the point of this conversation." I said truthfully.

She sat on the arm of the couch. "I want you to know that I am happy for the two of you. For Ardarlan. You have nothing to fear from me. You are the kind of woman I aspire to be, for my country."

"Thank you. I must admit that there is much about you that I also aspire towards." It wasn't a lie.

She didn't say a thing. Only assessed me. My truthfulness. I meant it. I could tell she wanted to say more. So just sat there, waiting as long as she needed to get her truth out.

"The treaty you're writing, will it be beneficial to all countries?" She broke her pride. She clearly didn't want to show that she was inept in legal writing and wouldn't know if something was beneficial for her people, her country.

"Yes, except perhaps in times of war." I answered proudly.

She tilted her head oddly. "The person who starts the war will benefit most."

I nodded. "Yes, but there is a chance for any of us to fall into that."

"Some more than others." She said pointedly. I nodded with a smile. Aelin was hot-tempered.

"The biggest threat I would say is Dornaelle, they faced border issues that have escalated during the unrest, and lack of soldiers. The other Fae countries are brutal to humans and unkind to faeries, not High Fae. Sellene, whom I have written to very little, confesses that she has to forcibly keep her soldiers and border patrol from taking matters into their own hands. That conflict seems inevitable."

"How do you glean that much from a few letters." She asked, interested.

"She is worried, and looking for assurance that we will come to her aide. Should she need it." I shrugged.

"And will we?" Manon asked. A dangerous question. My advice could send hundreds to their death or could send even more civilians to theirs should Sellene's army not be sufficient to hold Dornaelle.

"The treaty will demand it if Sellene asks, should they not only want help in securing borders, but conquering territory, the treaty will not demand support from others. If you chose to help with that effort as well, it would be up to you. I believe from what I have learned about the other Fae countries, Dornaelle is more inclusive and filled with less hate, I don't think it would be the worst thing for Dornaelle to be the only, but much larger Fae country." I explained.

Manon gobbled up my words. "What will Aelin do?"

I considered for a moment. How much could I tell her, and what would actually happen? "If it happens soon, she will send Rowan and Lorcan and whoever else she can to help them, but her army will do little against Fae, broken and tired as it is."

"And what will Dorian do?" She seemed to have been sitting on this question the longest.

I wasn't sure in what situation she meant. "He has no army, but more food and supplies than his people can use. He will likely donate to the effort, but not support the conquering, only securing borders."

The edge of lips tipped up. "He wants to be a peaceful man."

"I think we all could use some peace, to heal." I agreed.


	33. Chapter 33: Yulesmas

**Chapter 33: Healing**

 **LATE DECEMBER**

 **Holly:**

We had cemented our routine by Yulesmas, which threw it completely off.

All my presents I had bought for family were still sitting in my rooms in Terrasen. Yet, all of my family was coming down for the festiveness. Most likely to check on me. It would be Rainsley's first trip away from Ornyth, and I knew that Rowan would keep the ship on smooth sailing, quickly back to land. I was eager, more than eager to see them all.

I could tell Fenrys was excited as well, he was pacing waiting for the time to head down from the castle to the docks to meet them. And when the ship came into view, I knew he was fighting the urge to jump out on to it with his power.

Queen Gorgina insisted on sitting with me in the carriage, I sent Uller in another one, so he didn't have to listen to me gently push back on her efforts to plan my wedding to Dorian.

I had agreed to play this part, not realizing how determined she was.

We would continue to keep this rouse up as long as the money kept being brought in.

"Oh, my dear, I hadn't thought of it yet, but who will be replacing you as Hand in Terrasend?" She asked with a blink. I hated how she said Terrasen. It made me want to grind my teeth. There was no D in the word.

"Aedion, I imagine." I said flippantly.

"But Queen Aelin, knows your plans. She will not be pleased we are stealing such a glorious young woman from her employ." She made a note on her list of things. She always had lists. Lists of color schemes for our wedding flowers for the arrangements, good dates to get married, styles for my gown. I wouldn't be surprised if she had the guest list done already, but compliments she doled out liberally didn't hurt.

I barely heard her as we rolled down and down towards the docks. Soon, so soon I get to see my family again.

…

Over dinner we were exchanging stories of what had happened, and Aelin asked after how our riddle plan was working. Dorian talked in a great detail about our plan to get his mother off of his back, and how no one had guessed it yet. He also brought up that a delegation of witches had shown up, and all missed the answer. His importance on mentioning that the witches would have a better chance of guessing only confirmed my guess for the riddle.

Aelin then turned my attention to me, asking about how I felt about being fake engaged. Dorian looked nervous, and just to exact revenge on sticking me in a carriage with his mom alone, I decided to tease him.

"Oh, well, I know the answer to the riddle, so I'm the one with all the power." I smirked at her. She raised a brow, but Dorian looked surprised.

"You know it?" He pushed.

I rolled my eyes. "Yes,"

"Then what's the answer?" He challenged.

I didn't want to answer. Once I did, I would lose the surprise and the control. If I didn't answer he wouldn't think I had it at all. "The moon is Manon, whom you slipped and called Witchling. She practically sneered princeling at you. The answer is not so cleverly, princeling."

"Oh," was all he said. He sat back in his chair and looked too pensive.

"Is that all you said to Manon?" Aelin asked concerned.

"No, she paid a late-night visit to my rooms, and we exchanged a few hostile words." Dorian smiled sarcastically.

"About?" Yrene pushed.

"She didn't want to talk to me." Dorian said with a damning look at me.

"She wanted to speak with me, but I was in Dorian's room, asleep, she likely wasn't pleased about that." I clarified.

"What did she want with you?" Aelin pushed.

I looked at Dorian. Did I tell him? Sometimes I wasn't sure he was pretending to be interested in me. "She wanted to give her blessing to our marriage."

"The marriage that still isn't happening right?" Fenrys asked. I elbowed him.

"Of course, it's not happening! I can't stand these southerners." I joked.

"Oh, we are in the middle, we are hardly southerners." Chaol retorted.

"Excuse you, I have lived further north than anyone here. If call you southerners, I have that right. And you married a southerner." I smiled despite my argumentative tone.

"Yrene," he started.

"Oh, please she has no defense. She lived in the southern content." Aelin chimed in. "We still love her though."

"There's nothing wrong with southerners, except when they complain about the snow, and the cold." I waved my hands dramatically.

"You sent Uller out without a jacket, what did you expect?" Dorian asked indigent.

"He has been in temperatures twice as cold, and was just fine." I argued back.

"Oh, trouble in paradise." Aedion joked form the other end of the table.

But that word. Bliss, paradise killed me. So, I dropped it. I dropped the funny jokes and engaging in conversation unless asked a direct question. I dropped it all and found an excuse to slip off to bed early.

…

"Tell me what happened." Aelin demanded once we were mostly alone, it just us and Elide.

"What more is there to say?" I furrowed my brow, worried.

"I meant about sleeping with Dorian." Aelin clarified with a wave of her hand. Baby Rainsley was fussy and she was pacing up and down before the fireplace.

"I haven't slept with him." I scoffed at the suggestion.

'What?" Elide and Aelin asked together.

"We just work late, as we have many things to get done." I explained.

"Dorian's reputation is long, and notorious. If you aren't sleeping together, everyone must think you are." Aelin warned.

"That's not what I want." I sighed and reached for the bottle of wine.

"What is really interesting," Elide started, "is that he is giving up his space to hold his nefarious interactions for you."

"For the treaty." I corrected.

"Well I didn't send you south for the politics." Aelin winked.

I rolled my eyes.


	34. Chapter 34: Uller's Birthday (Again)

**Hi ALL!**

 **I wanted to say that this chapter is a total odd one! It's not needed for the plot of THIS story, but if you'd like to read AOGAS, then the conflict that is presented in this is important. If you don't plan on reading anymore than this story, then I invite you ignore the big the picture of it, as it won't be touched as much as it should. That all very vague, but read the chapter and you will understand!**

 **Thanks for all of the support!**

 **-Fishy**

 **(PS only 6 chapters left!)**

* * *

 **Chapter 34: Uller's 6** **th** **Birthday**

 **Three Months Later: MARCH**

 **Holly:**

Uller's fifth birthday was even bigger than his last. I feared that we might be heading down a road of elaborate events that we would struggle to top each year.

Everyone was very kind, and Queen Gorgina, most of all. She had arranged it all. Once she told me, she ordered a whole carnival to come for Hollin's birthday, but I had desperately pleaded for something less extravagant. She had plied me with many excuses in her planning such a party, telling me that she was so excited to be able to plan her future in-laws parties, and how she would love to start planning a wedding. It was difficult to say no to her without sounding rude or discounting her.

The courtyard was more colorful than I had seen it. Somehow all the flowers were in bloom the first days of spring, and flooring had been rolled out over the lawn so we could dance.

Everyone floated and flocked around. The lights were insanely bright. Every glittering piece and jewel was mesmerizing. There was a buzzing surrounding the dance floor, and I was glad for the dark red flowers around the top of my dress, they hid my sweat.

I wanted Uller to remain kind and down to earth, not become as Hollin had. I was worried, to say the least, and being stolen away every few minutes by lords and rich men to dance was not helping my nerves. Dorian would always cut in after one song, but I each time I was getting more frazzled. This was supposed to be about Uller. I had been here since November, and now Uller had to spend another birthday away from everyone. We had missed Vili's birthday, I wouldn't miss his because I was too busy. My own was approaching too. I wouldn't spend two in Ardarlan. I would return before the leaves changed.

For this event the queen had a dress delivered to my room. One which I had to wear, otherwise it would be rude. It was white, and strapless. I had to keep pulling it up by the very bright red flowers lining the top. It was a very lovely flowing sort of gown, full of layers of tulle and gossamer, but the waist was tight, and though a ring of Eldostrom red flowers went around the whole top, the middle had a sheered section cut to display things I typically didn't. I felt gorgeous, I got hundreds of compliments, but I also felt on display, a pretty doll.

The night never seemed to end, and if one more man asked me to dance, I might cry.

Eventually it did end.

I slipped from the hall after Uller had fallen asleep. Coming to my own rooms I collapsed on the bed, still bound tight into my dress.

"Well I didn't realize how taxing parties were for you." Dorian's drawl made me groan.

"I was having a bad day." I tried to hide from the light, it was better not to look at them.

"I saw." He pushed off of the wall, and crossed to me. "Shoes," he gestured to my feet. I swung them up, and Dorian slipped the heels off my feet and dropped them to the ground. I rolled over too, this wasn't just a curtesy visit.

"Why couldn't you declare no one could dance with me." I groaned. I already knew the answer though.

"Well, if you actually want to get married, or even just engaged." He smirked. "But my queen will have to entertain sometimes." He sat on the bed and rubbed my feet.

"Sometimes." I smirked.

"Where are all of your servants?" He asked, concerned.

"Cleaning up the party, or sleeping." I guessed.

"Alright, I'll leave you if you're feeling better." He didn't move though.

"No, you can stay, then we can finish the military aide section of the treaty. Plus, I don't want you stop massaging me." I struggled saying that much, with this tight dress. First order of business was to get out of it.

"And you can't get out of the dress yourself." Dorian guessed.

"It's a backwards corset, so I don't think you could get it either, without ripping it." I challenged.

"Roll over." He commanded, dropping my feet, much to my discontent.

"I'm feeling unwell. Suddenly." I blurted.

Dorian stopped with his flirtatious touches, thinking I wasn't interested. He pressed his hand to my forehead. "What have you eaten today?"

"I ate the lunch you were supposed to attend, and I snacked at the party." I choked out.

"Is the dress too tight, are you starving yourself of air?" His words were more concerned than I felt.

I only blinked at him. I didn't feel well, that was all I knew. Dorian whipped at my face. His hand was a blur of red and the room swirled and darkened.

…

"The bindings of the corset were lined with pricks of poison. You were almost killed, Holly. It was only Yrene's quick work that ensured you'd live." Dorian explained when I woke.

I didn't say it. How could I? Dorian's mother was difficult, but not murderous. How could I allow her to do it again, though.

"Your mother." I coughed. He leaned in, too close. "Your mother gave me that dress."

"I know and we have already chatted with her. It was part of large order she sent for, from the outer Fae countries. We have uncovered a plot. Action has already been taken." He implored me. I could tell he had been worried. His hair was desirably unkempt and his sword was laying nearby.

"This could start a war." And now I couldn't help the tears that came.

"Likely." He answered sadly.

The only good that would of this would be Aelin returning to Ardarlan early for the summit in couple months. We would have to tell everyone that the unallied Fae countries were sighting our strength together, and likely would lead to some conflict down the road. This could either make or break the treaty. And all of our hard work might be tossed away.

Fenrys was curled around me, in wolf form. I knew he would be angry with himself at missing this threat. It seems that the enemies of Aelin had finally learned a lesson. Swords and open threats weren't the way to attack Terrasen.


	35. Chapter 35: HOOK

**Chapter 35: Hook**

 **A FEW MONTHS LATER: EARLY JUNE**

 **Dorian:**

We had only a short while until the first ships began arriving for the summit. We had all but completed the treaty. We were planning how we would handle the summit, the debates, and well, Holly had no quarter for disorganization. Our plans for the summit had not quite concluded when Holly nodded off.

She was tired, and the longer we drug the conversation on, the more ridiculous her suggestions became. We were nearing the end of our time together and I was desperately worried for that goodbye. I worried that the poison is still infecting her, even if it was slowly. The prickly spines were tiny and went deep, Yrene had found another spine only last week, and she had initially spent a day digging them out of her chest.

Holly wasn't the type to be wooed from gifts sent from afar, and I didn't have the stomach to try and be rejected.

Holly was kind and loving and strong, and smart. She would either change her mind about me or not. I didn't want to push her, and make her even more uncomfortable around me. I did my best to appear her friend, not love interest. Though Aelin had urged me to the opposite when I was in Terrasen.

That visit had taken the worst turn possible, ending with her child brother being beat. I would always blame myself for my actions, they were the tipping of Vaughan.

And after the attack on her life, even if it wasn't directly for her. That type of act started wars, and we were all waiting with bated breath for what the other lords and kings might say once we all came together. It also meant that we needed to increase security.

I couldn't even bare to watch her sleeping figure as I had in the past.

Other distractions that had come along with Holly, served me well.

…

 **Holly:**

There was a shattering in the room, and I sat upright. The lights had all been dimmed and I had been moved to my usual chaise.

In the other room I could see figures moving, giggling of men. A vase had shattered on the floor. A dark haired man, without a shirt. Dorian and Fenrys.

I nearly screamed and I wasn't completely sure why.

I gripped the blanket they must have draped over me. So much for Aelin trying to set me up with Dorian.

On the lightest feet possible, I slipped from his rooms and down the Kings tower to my own rooms. It was a long time since I had slept in my own bed.

I stopped in on Uller. He had grown so much here. Everyday I was busier and busier. I hated missing it, but I knew that if this treaty didn't stand, he would have little choice in his future. If the treaty didn't stand, he would only know blood and blade. Aelin wanted a better world and she had trusted me with job. It might hurt my heart, but I would have to see these few weeks through, until the very end.


	36. Chapter 36: Horse Race

**Chapter 36: HORSE RACE**

 **JULY, THREE DAYS BEFORE THE SUMMIT**

 **Fenrys:**

The first horse race Holly had to be talked into. Mostly it was by Choal, whose horse she rode, but also by Yrene, by me, and by Dorian. She was desperate to ride, to race, but felt like it was too much of a distraction.

Now the treaty was done, barely, but done.

The grand stables that set around the arena that was newly rebuilt was in full bustle. Holly and Farsha were very still in comparison. Dorian set to telling jokes to distract Uller from bugging Holly while she readied for the race.

Yrene and Choal were also there, hovering nearby with Nehemia. I wasn't sure what I should do. Sit with Dorian, or go near Holly, after last night.

I realized she was gone before morning, something that never happened. She liked to sleep in. She must had seen us and left, either out of embarrassment or the need to be gone.

The tension felt like it was building and building. I might burst from it, but the races were going to begin so we all trooped up the stairs to the Kings box.

There were several races being held this morning. And Holly's was the climax, the last. So, drinks flowed and flowed until finally they took up mount along very intimidating horses and riders alike.

This pounding of the drum, waiting for the shot to ring out was more like waiting for two lines of opposing armies to clash than I care to admit. My blood was boiling from the suspense, the intensity of it. No one's life was at risk though, and such I was allowed to enjoy the feeling. I didn't have to dial into that killing calm. I watched Holly closely. She never once looked for anyone, but instead talked her horse.

The cannon signaled the start and Holly and Farsha fell right into the middle of the pack, but as they made that first turn, took on a faster pace. Faster, still they raced, until I couldn't see her hooves hitting the ground and they were flying ten paces, then twenty paces in front of the next horse.

Until Holly crossed the finish line almost lapping the last in line.

Dorian burst from his seat. Screaming and cheering. Everyone roared as the Hand of the Queen of Terrasen reared up on Hellas horse, victorious. The end of the race brought endless shouting and cheers.

No one had expected this, Holly was the only female racing, her horse equally the only female one.

Dorian burst from the box and raced down and down the stairs until the gates tried to hold him back. Being king, they couldn't really do that, and so he jumped the gate, and ran the rest of way to Holly and Farsha.

He pulled her from her horse and, in front half of Rifthold, kissed her soundly.

The cheers had been deafening before, but now, well I couldn't even pick out Yrene's laughing over the din.

They were smiling as the rest of us made it down to the field.

…

 **THE NIGHT BEFORE THE SUMMIT**

 **Holly:**

It was our last dinners together. Before all of the delegates began arriving at least.

I could tell Fenrys felt off, and I wasn't totally sure what issue was bothering him more. I wanted to fix it, but every time I looked at him, I couldn't help but see the planes of their backs, chests. It made looking at either of them difficult, and while Dorian had declared his affection publicly, for me…. I had never wanted his attention, Dorians at least. But I would greatly accept more of his kisses.

And with that thought, well, I guess I finally knew what I wanted.

Yrene and Choal retired early, as they were trying and failing to keep a schedule with their baby. Uller had wandered off hours ago.

This couch, which I had fallen asleep on a hundred times in the last six months. How many times had Fenrys and Dorian been on it as well, doing less innocent things.

Dorian returned from his bedroom, the one room I had never been in, wet. His hair fell into his eyes and his shirt wasn't tied up to his neck.

Fenrys was practically salivating, and I hate to admit that I nearly was too.

This was exactly what I didn't want to happen. And it was exactly what Aelin wanted to happen.

She had sent me away from Ren, who was the only eligible bachelor that I had known previously, someone who I resented just a bit in his role of dissolving my relationship with Vaughan before it had had a chance to be strong. Wrong as it may be, Aelin had known and separated us. And she had sent me to two of the most eligible bachelors in all the world. Damn her.

"Holly," Dorian asked.

I had been staring. "I was just thinking about the last time I saw you without a shirt." I said automatically. Not the tactic I was thinking about, but I guess I couldn't hurt anything. Now that I knew what I wanted.

"When was that?" He asked, humoring me.

"The night before the horse race." I made myself look from him to Fenrys.

"You saw us, then?" Fenrys asked, and he looked more scared than approving.

"I did," I said matter of factly. They exchanged a nervous glance. "I must admit I'm a bit relieved that Dorian had finally stopped trying to get me to be queen."

They both laughed loud and quick.

Even though he had kissed me today, Manon was right. That brilliant victory was about as passionate as we would ever get. We were partners, not lovers.


	37. Chapter 37: Ships ArriveVaughans return

**MID JULY:**

 **Holly:**

We were poised on the docks, waiting for everyone's ships to come in. Aelin and the rest of the Terrasen delegation had come in later than we had excepted them. It was easier to stand by Aelin than anyone else.

The first ship to dock was the southern continents. They had to travel the furthest. The whole family, excluding the sister had come. Half of their vizors and a fair number of servants. They didn't trust us, probably at all. A few Ruks came, and I knew that the first thing Uller would ask, would be about the Ruks.

Nesryn, whom I had never met, embraced half of my family. The others held firm handshakes and easy talks. I had no reason to mistrust these people, but they set my skin crawling.

I had worn a new dress, dangerous as it might be, a new summer fashion, that was pretty and flowing. Queen Georgina had again chosen a dress for me, but instead of Eldostrom red, or Dorian's favorite color, it was green for Terrasen. I was a representative for my country, even if Aelin was here too. I felt alive in green and the flowing fabric made feel like a tiny sprite.

The princes were all too friendly, Nesryn was too friendly too. Maybe it was their culture, but the mistrust shown in their packing and numerous servants countered that theory. They must want this to work, or maybe they really were friends. Lysandra, Fenrys, Rowan, and Lorcan had welcomed me even more warmly. It was hard to know without outright asking, and even then, it seemed rude to ask my friends about their battle comrade's intentions.

Next came the joint eastern continent's ship. We knew that both Wendlyn and the Dornaelle Fae were coming together. It seemed odd, but the Dornaelle fleet had been depleted and I had a feeling that Sellene was more interested in peace than chopping all of her trees down for new ships.

When the ship pulled in, close enough to see, a messenger came off first. They handed Dorian the message then waited patiently for the reply back. I was curious to know what it said, but I didn't dare try to see. I stood straight backed and waited for Dorians verdict on whatever matter it was.

"Holly," Dorian said and got of his place in line to hand me the paper.

 _King Dorian,_

 _My mate and consort, Vaughan, has been banished from your lands. For this treaty to include Dornaelle, I will need you to lift this ban. I assure you, I will take responsibility of his actions._

 _With gratitude,_

 _Sellene_

"Oh course," I said disbelieving. Vaughan was now king consort. Likely would take every opportunity to flaunt it in my face. I looked to Dorian. There was no question though. We needed this treaty, I would never be the reason why it failed. "Increase the guard on Uller, then we can have peace."

Dorian tipped his head to his new captain of the guard who hurried off to do what I bid. Dorian then wedged himself in between me and Elide.

"I know you aren't keen on being a queen. We already have a public relationship." He whispered before, I cut him a glance that stopped his plea for my affections. "Won't it be best to show Vaughan you have moved on."

"I have moved on." I snapped as quietly as I could.

"Holly," He chided.

"I don't want to make him jealous, plus you read the letter, they are mates. There is no reason to think he will cause problems." I lectured.

"Very well," He redirected his attention on the messenger.

The messenger took the longest time to reappear. When he did it was behind all of the royals. Even the Wendlyn King, and advisors had waited for our reply. Dorian's reply. Even though he consented to hear my opinion on the matter, it was him who held all of the power, him who it would always defer to. Not because of anything. But his name, his birthright. He was king, and even I was queen, he would always rule above me. I could never share a partnership of life with such inequality. It wouldn't be sharing a life with someone. I liked Dorian, but there was growing list of reasons why I couldn't marry him.

When Vaughan, on Sellene's arm, drew closer, I reached for Dorian's hand. It was comfort I wanted, not a show. Their sharp Fae eyes watched the movement, and their noses flared likely wondering what sort of company I would keep with the king.

"It is an honor to be here, you have done such a magnificent job rebuilding." Sellene said kindly. "Thank you for lifting the ban on my mate."

"Oh course, ill feelings were why it was placed, and that is no reason to get in the way of peace." Dorian said smoothly. He smiled gorgeously, and gestured for them to make their way down the line of ambassadors and royals.

Vaughan and Sellene walked right past me, ignoring me in the most polite way. I didn't mind though. It was better than a fight ruining all we had worked on. I knew I would be rude if he started to talk me, and so ignoring each other was the best option, even if it was rude.

"A lasting peace, I hope. I won't be travelling all this way every year." The king of Wendlyn chuckled at his, not so amusing, joke. "This is the first time I have left the castle proper in six years."

"I hope this feel more like a vacation than negotiations." I found myself saying.

"You're the girl who wrote the invitations to us all. Queen Aelin's Hand?" The King asked.

I nodded my ascent. I had set my smile early this morning so even the slight in _the girl_ didn't move it.

"I'm sure she gave you the job to distract us all with your beauty, we'll sign anything as long as you're sitting across from us." He smiled at his joke and an uneasy laugh filtered from a few people.

"I actually helped King Dorian write the treaty, it's why I've been in Rifthold instead in the North." I informed him. I was not some pretty doll to dress up.

"Well, I'm sure he was appreciative of whoever gave that order." The king shuffled down the line to greet others.

I felt sick again. Elide reached around Dorian to give me a confidence boost, but I didn't want to be touched or gawked at. Only one more arrival of note then I could change from this revealing summer dress to something else.

The delegations coming from the west didn't bother with a ship, but flew on wrvyens, all of them. It seemed like many people were working closely together without us forcing them so. Manon and Queen Ansel were kind in their greetings, but they were the shortest, despite being late to arrive. I was glad to see Manon, she was one of the only friendly faces. Even though everyone, including her, was thinking I was bedding the king. Though they certainly weren't too far off.

We took to the carriages and winded back up to the castle so we might begin this tedious journey to peace.

It was different world. A united world.


	38. Chapter 38: Dilberating

MID JULY

HOLLY:

Upon arrival at the castle, we ate a fine meal, then delivered them to their rooms. Where they were free to read through the treaty in its entirety. The discussions would begin in the morning.

We mixed up the seating chart for every meal, everyone would sit next to everyone, except I would never sit near Vaughan. At this meal I had the pleasure of being seated across from Kashin, Arghun, and next to Sartaq and Nesryn, and on the other side of me was Fenrys.

I had only one ally in this, and to them Fenrys was warrior turned bodyguard.

They wasted no time in bringing up the treaty. "War would bring our country money. We have weapons and supplies that others can purchase. This treaty is not beneficial to us." Arghun began telling me, smugly, which told me much about him still wanting to sign it, despite the lack of advantageous clauses regarding war time.

Before I could point his fault in this, Sartaq began, "What my brother means to say is that war has been apart of our heritage, and we would like to enter this treaty, even if we might be losing a monetary market, because we know the horrors of war."

"It's a hard choice to shy away for monetary gain." I said evenly.

Kashin cut in, before Arghun could describe just how much he would lose. "Look at that scowl, Sartaq, please let us talk about something more interesting, Holly has been going over this for months, she doesn't want you to pull it apart only after reading half of it."

"I read the whole thing." He said admonished.

The brothers exchange a series of silent looks. Arghun relented. To me Kashin whispered, "I skimmed the second half."

"Well, it is over a hundred pages." I smiled. "I can read the whole thing in an hour, but only because I wrote nearly all of it."

"I thought Dorian helped you." Kashin asked, he was quiet in his questions and demeanor.

"He doesn't like his handwriting, even though its beautiful, so I wrote them all out myself, even if he touted ideas at me. He helped with physically writing the earlier drafts." I admitted.

"Do you do anything fun?" Nesryn asked.

"I haven't had much free time lately." I sighed.

Nesryn leaned between Sartaq and the table, he graciously leaned back. "When I was speaking to Choal about you, he said you ride horses."

"Before my lands were burned, and my father forced us into hiding, we had many horses, which I would often race and just as often win." They had the finest in the world, how I could say I rode horses, and raced without sounding like a challenge, one I did not want that, not this week, not ever.

"But he said you recently won a race." She protested.

"Did he now?" I muttered to myself.

"Yes, it was grand ending, which Dorian kissed you in front of the whole city." She smirked. I set my fork down with a bit of clatter. People looked down to the spot where we were sitting. With so many fae here, they likely overheard everything.

I set my jaw. Was she doing this on purpose? I couldn't feel more embarrassed. I didn't want to say a word, I was afraid that it would sound harsh. I felt nothing but defensive.

The conversation was steered back to the treaty, and I was grateful.

…

I knew Aelin would be expecting me to give her the detail on my conversations, but I couldn't. I didn't feel like complaining, and I knew that's all I would do. Instead I headed up the king's tower, Fenrys at my heels.

I would hide here until Dorian kicked me out.

When I pushed open the door, I found he was already here.

He was speaking before I even opened the door all of the way. "You know, I don't get to share my affection for people publicly very often. I don't want to cause you problems, Holly, but I thought you had changed your mind."

"I haven't." I nearly choked on the word. "It's not that I don't enjoy you or your affections, but you don't get to be public because it causes problems for the other person."

"Why is that, do you think?" He didn't get it then. He didn't hear how everyone always wanted to know what I was doing with the king, who I was to him. He didn't hear the comments about being a "girl", even while others were chastised for saying 'highness' instead of 'majesty' when addressing him.

Maybe I should have just gone to Aelin to complain. Instead I said the words that had been bubbling all day, through odd comment about our relationship or my incompetence as a woman in a man's job. "Only a queen can survive a kings love."

"Well, if that's how you feel," Dorian looked hurt. Truly hurt.

"I am not a queen, and I never will be. I have said before, and I mean it. Don't try to make me one, I will resent you." I told him, taking his hands. "There are other options. I know Manon asked for time, but she still loves you. You're still young. No matter what your mother thinks. You have time to find someone, or time to wait for her. I am not her, and I never will be able to compare."

Dorians throat bobbed. My continued rejection, Manon's rejection must have been getting to him lately. In the quietest voice possible, he said, "I endeavor to be worthy of my friends."

"I don't care about the terrible things you have done. You're here now. You are doing your best to make this world safe, to bring a peace. There is no one more worthy of love and admiration than you."

"You don't know-" Dorian started.

"I wasn't there, and that will forever be one of my shames, but I have been told by many people what happened." I said calmly.

"I killed my father." He deadpanned.

I didn't even blink. I didn't know what to say. The truth, though, I knew that was always the best thing. "Your father destroyed my country. He may not have been an evil man, but he was consumed by evil. Now he can be at peace."

"I can't do this alone. When you leave," Dorian started to say, but couldn't continue.

"I'll be three days away. I'll see you for holidays. I'm not going away forever, but I do need to go home." I said firmly. At the end of this, I would go home.

We had tea together then Fenrys and I left. We may not have to work on drafts of the treaty, but there still a full day of work to tackle in the morning. When we were back in my suite Fenrys uncorked an old bottle of wine, and poured me a large glass.

Fenrys chuckled, "I think it's going to be a long week."

I groaned as I threw myself on to the pillows.


	39. Chapter 39: 2ND fav CH and 2nd to last

MID JULY:

HOLLY:

We had spent the week arguing. Dorian thought it would be a fabulous idea to hold a ball, to get drunk and blow off steam. To dance and flirt and celebrate. We had reached a peace after weeks of arguing times, and amounts. For the most part our work wording and compiling had been sufficient, but cost of things changed all of the time, and so we adopted a percent system that also changed with the seasons.

This was not what Dorian and I intended, but it worked, and everyone seemed to agree it was the best compromise. And that was good enough for me.

I was excited about going home soon. I was excited to have accomplished this massive feat.

Still, I felt far from that when, yet another dragged me away from a tantalizing conversation with Elide about what exactly she was doing with Lorcan when she had missed the last board meeting.

As soon as the song ended, I detached, ready to find Elide again. She was standing with Dorian and Lorcan, Dorian was ignoring them completely, staring directly at Manon.

I knew he was in love with her, and no matter how kind, smart, funny, or sweet he was…. I couldn't live here, I couldn't be queen, and I most certainly couldn't take away Dorain's true happiness.

I had proven myself quite good at international relations, time to repair some on behalf of Dorian.

…

 **Later that night:**

 **HOLLY:**

"What are you doing here?" Manon snapped at me. I had gone to the aerie. Well, makeshift aerie for the Ruks and Wryvens.

"I wanted to talk." I tried to lean against the walls, but they were too cold so I stood up quickly.

"We've already talked." Her eyes leveled on me in a threatening way.

"Dorian and I were never in love or intending to get married. It was all an excuse to pass off the competition to his mother." I told her.

She didn't say anything.

Well that wasn't unreeving at all. I wrung my hand together. "I never would have agreed to the circumstances if I knew that someone was actually in love with him. That must have been very painful."

Still she stood there.

"He needs someone to help him, someone he can trust with his emotions and dreams. I think you do too. The people you're surrounded by aren't people you trust intrinsically." I said as earnestly as I dared.

"I've already tried being with the king." Her harsh whisper was swept up by the wind and various bodies flapping.

I took one step, trying my best not to treat like a wounded animal. "You haven't given it a shot as queen who has started to heal."

"You weren't there." She hissed.

"Stories of the heroics of your coven will forever be apart of the history in Terrasen." Even tears filled my eyes.

"He reminds me of them." A single tear striped down her cheek.

"My mother died giving birth to my little brother, and my father died in the war. My little brother will say the oddest things sometimes. Things my father would be the only pne to say. It hurts so bad when those things pop out of the blue. I could be doing just fine, and suddenly my heart squeezes so tight I think I might die."

Manon looked to her wrvyen whose massive head swung into our conversation.

"It hurts, but it helps me remember him. It helps me be stronger. You will live forever, but I doubt you will find someone so utterly in love with you."

"I was taught that love is a weakness." She turned her body back towards me.

"It's not. The only reason the war was won was because of love. The love your coven for you and your people. The love of Aelin for her country. The love of Rowan for Aelin. Love drove this war to happen, and it drove it to an end." I explained.

Manon didn't bother to hide her tears, but baldly said, "I will consider what you have said."

With that she swung up onto her Wrvyen and dropped out of the aerie.


	40. Chapter 40: THE END (3 ending scenes)

LATE JULY:

Holly:

It was the very last day for official nonsense. We were signing the treaty today. We would all sign everyone's copies. It came to about ten signatures a person. There would be no burning of copies to void the agreement. This was binding, and permanent. For fifty years we would have peace, then we would gather again and reassess our strengths and our needs. Where the treaty had gotten holes or no longer applied.

I would not be apart of the next delegation. Aelin, Sellene, and Manon would be the only recurring monarchs. Even then Aelin decided to give up her throne to Rainsley early.

I was upset to be saying goodbye to Dorian so soon, but I was more excited to be returning home. Ornyth was my home, and while Aelin had sent me away to ensure a lasting safety of that home, I needed to go back. For my own sanity, and my own heart, I needed to see the Staghorns and have cooler weather. In all honesty I needed to have my horses back as well. I missed them desperately.

Vili had also remained in the north, and I needed my little sister as much as I needed my own bed and own things.

Cordial jokes and half-hearted offers of diplomatic visits filtered along the lines as we all signed, and signed, and signed.

A whole page of signatures.

We have enacted a peace with a flick of the wrist.

We would have a better world, without fear of others attacking, or no having aide when we needed it most.

Sellene had yet to decide on pursuing the other Fae countries that plotted my death, or someone's. Aelin seemed almost eager to return to the continent and wreck havoc. Her powers might have been less than before, but I knew she would do everything to ensure the safety of innocents.

Rowan was less than pleased with the idea, but he would follow his queens command.

The Fae countries who had morals less than desirable, seemed like the only loose end. Even that seemed dramatic, they weren't treating everyone fairly, but we didn't need to declare war on them as well. Well, I guess it was up to Sellene to decide that.

I secretly hoped that I wouldn't be around when the decision came through.

The world was going to be a bigger place, I didn't have time to waste on such a terrible thing, like war.

…

 **LATE JULY:**

 **Dorian:**

I was pleasantly surprised that my gift to Holly had come before her leaving.

I had wanted to get her an Asterion horse, but now that a tentative war was on the horizon, it proved impossible to get from Asterion.

Manon, however had had similar thoughts, and flew up to my tower one night and suggested how she would acquire them, if only I would present them accordingly. That conversation had led to another, and another. I was glad Holly had stopped visiting my rooms, after the fourth night Manon visited.

Holly's gift wasn't complete. The Asterion horses were expensive even coming from Ansel, though not nearly as expensive as the plot of land I acquired for her, in Terrasen.

She wanted a horse farm, there was not anything I would deny her. Not after all of her help with so many topics.

As much as I wanted her to stay around, Terrasen was her home, and there she would return.

I invited her down to the stables. When she saw the horses, tears pricked at her eyes, and then she hugged me tightly.

I bid her look into the saddle bag where the deed to land was and when she saw the shear number of acres, there was no point in stopping my tears either. I was going to miss her, but being able to help her with her dreams after she had practically handed me mine back, felt good.

…

 **NOVEMBER**

 **HOLLY:**

The Ranch was finished in record time. Construction began as soon as my design of it was done. Construction finished within two months. Farsha arrived only a week later, Aelin and Dorain both bought me two young Asterion horses, and the Southern continent had gifted me a mating pair of Daghun horses. I was eager to grow my horse empire in my spare time. If I would ever have any.

Aelin revealed that she was expecting another baby, and Elide revealed her own pregnancy.

I was so, so happy for our family to grow. Lorcan was snappish even more than Elide, Aelin, or Rowan combined.

Fenrys kept to his role as guard nearly every day. Venturing everywhere with me, and plying me with wine when I wanted to chuck reports into the fire instead of find the solutions and solve them. When Fenrys wasn't guarding, he was playing with Uller or out with his friends.

It was for first time, a truly happy life.


End file.
